


Shalom

by Puniyo



Series: Parallel Universes [3]
Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Supernatural Elements, Dom/sub Undertones, Kinks, M/M, Magical Realism, Masturbation, Murder and Crime, Profanity, Psychological Drama, Religious References, Screenplay/Script Format, Very dark themes, crude language, fluff and lemon, sacrificial sex, to be updated as it goes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-30
Updated: 2018-12-02
Packaged: 2019-04-30 04:01:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 39,319
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14488359
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Puniyo/pseuds/Puniyo
Summary: Javier is haunted by dreams of mysterious murders and he can't really sleep. Not until he meets an equally mysterious Yuzuru, who claims to be an angel...UPDATED AND COMPLETED [02-12-2018]





	1. Chapter I

**Author's Note:**

> Dear readers, as a huge supporter and advocate of purple prose, I decided to 'leave' that behind and tackle what I find most difficult to do - write dialogue. This is my first ever work written in a screenplay format. I'm trying my best to stay faithful to screenwriting conventions but it is a very amateurish piece. Also, certain margins and such are messed up as I post it, so pardon me. 
> 
> *I opted for a supernatural alternative universe this time. And one with quite some references to religion. I'm not trying to offend anyone, far from it, it's just another exploration of mine.
> 
> **This is a work of fiction. In no ways the content mentioned reflect the people the characters were based upon. Have fun!

1\. EXT. FOREST. NIGHT

It’s the outskirts of a city. The trees have full crowns, pretty thick ones, that it’s impossible to clearly see the individual shapes of the leaves. It’s in a hill and the center of the city can be seen. Buildings look like tiny static LEDs of various colors and shades, and less and less are illuminated as time passes. It’s Autumn. It’s a starless night and eerily quiet.

JAVIER, 27, in a plain T-shirt and ripped jeans on the knees, inappropriate for the chilly breeze of the season, walks unsteadily, drunk, as if he had consumed some really bad quality alcohol. He falls to the ground after stumbling over something. 

 

JAVIER

Damn! What the-

 

JAVIER looks at his feet and sees a dead gazelle, tongue sticking out and fresh blood oozing from open guts. A few flies rest on the sausage like intestines. JAVIER throws up – undigested food, peanuts, bile, and blood.

 

VOICE IN THE DARK

Disgusting. You’re crossing a line stranger.

 

JAVIER lifts his head, slightly dizzy, the sour smell of alcohol, digestive juices and his own sweat escalating the sense of sickness in him, but he knows exactly where the voice comes from and he looks at the largest branch of the oak in front of him.

There is only darkness but he knows someone is there.

 

VOICE IN THE DARK

You came for hunting?

 

JAVIER sees, or thinks he sees, the silhouette of a huge cat, and faints.

 

2\. INT. JAVIER’S ROOM. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. EARLY MORNING.

It’s a new day. JAVIER lies in bed, hair disheveled and he is frowning. He is having a nightmare and can’t seem to be able to wake up from it. The light blue sheets are ruffled and there are dark stains of sweat. He moans something incoherent, over and over.

ELIZA, 30, a trained alto singer, star of the latest _Indecent_ play, calls him a few times. JAVIER doesn’t wake up still. She sits next to him and touches his forehead carefully. He is suddenly jolt awake and grabs her chest, ripping a button of her white silk blouse and exposing her collarbone.

 

ELIZA

¡ _Jódase Javi_! What are you doing? Whining like a dog and now this (she points at her chest). Fuck you.

 

JAVIER looks apologetic but the fear and adrenaline still runs in is veins. He sits in bed, taking large inhalations of air.

 

JAVIER

‘m sorry. (He is suddenly very thirsty and his mouth is very dry) Did I go out last night?

 

ELIZA is fixing her blouse with the missing button in front of a small mirror in the room, the upper hem of her skin colored laced bra showing slightly, but she thinks it looks better this way. She puts a pair of clip pearl earrings.

 

ELIZA

 _No_ , you nymphomaniac monster. You came _inside_ even when I told you many times that it messes me up.

JAVIER

You love it when I fill you.

ELIZA

I do. I love you Javi. But I don’t want this anymore.

JAVIER

Are we having this talk again? Come here. It’s still early. I’ll give you an aria to sing.

 

ELIZA sits on the same spot as before. They kiss. It’s a light kiss. She doesn’t want to ruin her makeup. JAVIER hates the overly fake taste of strawberry of her lip gloss either. He is the first one to pull away but holds her hand. She wears a friendship fabric bracelet with a gold medallion. It’s very different from her other pieces of luxurious jewelry.

 

ELIZA

It’s over Javi. I won’t come here anymore.

JAVIER

Do you have anywhere else to go?

 

ELIZA looks indignant and hurt. She gets up, fixes her blouse, her khaki army green pants, and wears black stilettos. There is no remorse in JAVIER’s eyes.

 

ELIZA

 _She_ said she would take me back. She needs me Javi. She has forgiven me.

JAVIER

Who is _she_?

ELIZA

You’ll never understand. She is everything to me.

 

JAVIER doesn’t feel angry or agitated. He is confident that ELIZA will relapse and run back to him in no time. He is more curious about the mysterious _she_. ELIZA ties her hair in a bun and checks for her wallet in her designer bag.

 

ELIZA

You stink like a stray dog Javi.

 

ELIZA leaves the room. JAVIER can smell the cascades of sweat in his armpits and back. The sour smell makes him sick. He gets out and goes to the bathroom for a shower.

 

3\. INT. BATHROOM. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. EARLY MORNING.

The place is immaculate clean with bottles of shampoo, conditioner, gel douche, all perfectly aligned. All the products are citrus fruit scented and this type of sourness actually calms him down. He shaves in brief minutes, his cleaned face making him look much younger than he really is. He turns on the shower spray and the place is soon filled with steam. JAVIER moans of pleasure and relief under the hot water, his muscles unexpectedly sore and his manhood more sensitive than usual. He reaches for it, giving it a gentle rub. He is in the mood.

Suddenly, the silhouette of a BLACK CAT appears on the window.

 

BLACK CAT

Disgusting. Monster. Wake up.

 

JAVIER is startled by the sudden intrusion. He carelessly slips and hits his head on the cold-water facet. His vision fades.

 

4\. INT. JAVIER’S ROOM. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. MORNING.

JAVIER’s mobile phone vibrates and rings. It’s the generic ringtone of any mobile phone. He comes from the bathroom, hand on the back of his head. The name RAYA is on the screen.

 

JAVIER

I hope you have a really _good_ reason to bother me at this time.

 

His own voice makes his head hurt and he has no idea what time it is.

 

RAYA

Can’t friends just call each other? Was the sex that good?

JAVIER

 _Terrific_. And will be even better if you go away now.

RAYA

(pretending to sob)

I got tickets, man.

JAVIER

For what? The Thyssen exhibition?

RAYA

Even the devil couldn’t drag you there. _Los Merengues_ you bastard. VIP tickets with a straight view to Ramos kicking those _wieners_ back to their own town.

JAVIER

I love you brother.

RAYA

Yeah, yeah. Just introduce me to her, will you? This goddess with the power to make your zipper fly open with her gaze.

JAVIER

How desperate are you?

RAYA

For you? Never. For a good fuck? Always.

JAVIER

 _Cabrón._ See you later.

RAYA

Pray that Brian will let me go early.

JAVIER

I pray that you will finally get laid.

RAYA

Yes, pray please. _Hard_.

 

JAVIER disconnects the call. He puts down the phone, the handset smeared with red stains. He looks at his hand, the one on his head just now and is full of blood.

 

5\. INT. BATHROOM. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. MORNING.

JAVIER looks at the mirror while he washes his hand. He can’t see the cut. There is a lump on the back of his head but at least the wound has stopped bleeding and there is only pain. He quickly applies a wet towel to remove the dried blood. He looks at the mirror again and he can see the silhouette of the BLACK CAT in the window again. He turns to the source of the image but it is gone.

 

JAVIER

(pointing at himself in the mirror)

No more drinking parties with Laura and Sonia after work. Get a grip Javi.

 

JAVIER dresses casually, a pair of light blue fainted jeans, an orange windbreaker on top of his Pacman theme T-shirt and running shoes. He shoves his wallet on the back pocket, a simplified rosary as necklace hidden underneath his shirt, keys and phone on his hand.

 

6\. EXT. FUENTE DEL ÁNGEL CAÍDO. EL RETIRO. DAY.

It’s almost noon. It’s Sunday but there are teenagers in school uniform. A group of young university students are practicing tricks on skates and monocycles. JAVIER sits on am empty bench facing _Paseo Uruguay_ , a cup of warm latte in his hand. A street performer with a rather old guitar plays children’s songs. A group of children, five of them, dance around the artist.

They are joined by YUZURU, 23, a fragile looking young man of pale but healthy complexion. His dark hair is a huge contrast to his skin tone and his white ‘you can do it’ hoodie, which is too long and large for his slender frame, almost looks like a dress/robe. He is very light on his feet and teaches the children some sort of Irish tap dance and classical ballet hybrid.

JAVIER doesn’t know his name and has never seen him before. He can’t take his eyes off him and he swears he can see a pair of wings on his back. JAVIER is so mesmerized at the thought that he almost chokes on his coffee when Yuzuru sits next to him without he realizing it.

 

YUZURU

Would you like to join us, Mr. Stranger?

JAVIER

(lifting his disposable paper cup and wiping his mouth with the back of his hand)

Sorry. I didn’t want to stare. It just… I just-

YUZURU

You were looking at me.

JAVIER

Yes. No, I mean, it seems like you’re all having so much fun.

YUZURU

You can too. It would help to clear the caffeine.

JAVIER

It’s decaffeinated.

YUZURU

They always say that. Same color, same smell, same taste. A spoon from the wrong bag never made much difference.

JAVIER

You don’t trust people.

YUZURU

I do. Just not those who drink decaf.

JAVIER

(laughing as resigned to a defeat)

Fine. I was looking at you.

 

YUZURU grins, which makes him look even younger. JAVIER is staring again as he grips the paper cup, inadvertently crushing it slightly as he loses himself in the void of YUZURU’s dark eyes, like two glass marbles.

 

YUZURU

You’re thinking that I’m too beautiful for a boy.

JAVIER

(somehow mocking)

Yes, a _Madonna_ of the oasis of the Sahara, the Salome of the modern era. From which gallery did you escape from?

BLOND GIRL IN VIOLET DRESS

Yuzu! (crying) I want Yuzu!

 

YUZURU stands up and leaves JAVIER without replaying. He approaches the BLOND GIRL, 8, who is stretched at the cement floor from a nasty fall. She is holding something in her hands. YUZURU crouches and helps her get on her feet. They are of the same height with YUZURU in that position.

They are not far so JAVIER can hear the conversation perfectly well.

 

YUZURU

What’s wrong Pauline? Why is the most graceful princess of the universe crying? I thought these tears were only for me.

BLOND GIRL/PAULINE

I killed it Yuzu! I just wanted to play with it.

 

PAULINE opens her hands. There is a butterfly, barely fluttering, with one of the neon blue wings ripped off. It is the size of her palm.

 

PAULINE

I didn’t mean to! I swear! I’m not a bad girl! (more sobs)

YUZURU

Don’t cry my princess. (He extends his hands) Can I have it?

 

PAULINE hands him the torn butterfly. YUZURU gently closes his hands around the animal, as well as his eyes. JAVIER thinks he is going to perform a magic trick but his posture is one of praying.

 

YUZURU

Oh butterfly, butterfly, come back to my princess, for her tears break my heart. Oh butterfly, butterfly, creature of light, come back to me.

 

YUZURU opens his hands and the butterfly spreads open its wings, the blue in its two completely restored wings glowing in an unworldly fluorescence. It rests on PAULINE’s head for a second and flies away. She jumps with joy and hugs YUZURU, kissing him on the cheek. She runs again, chasing the animal. The butterfly seems to play along.

 

JAVIER

(in a slightly louder tone)

Are you an angel?

YUZURU

Yes. (He points at the statue at the center of the fountain)

 

The statue at the center is the eponym of the very place – _Ángel Caído_ , a fallen angel. The statue is on a pedestal surrounded by figures of devils gnawing on fishes, snakes and lizards.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

Do I look like it? (He approaches JAVIER again, who seems ready to leave)

JAVIER

No. (For a brief second, he actually thinks the opposite) You’re too clothed and-

 

When JAVIER looks at YUZURU, the young man is completely naked, a real representation of the statue, a large python running between his thighs and the head of the reptile engulfing his manhood.

 

YUZURU

That’s the worst pick up line I’ve ever heard.

 

JAVIER is startled by YUZURU who is sitting again next to him, just like before. He looks at the empty space in front of him. There is no one there. He looks at YUZURU, his eyes showing a hint of fear.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

I’m sorry. Did I offend you?

JAVIER

(feeling too self-aware)

No. I just- forget it. (He stands and throws the coffee cup in the garbage can immediately next to the bench) I need to go.

YUZURU

Will you come here again?

JAVIER

Maybe.

YUZURU

So you trust fate?

JAVIER

You don’t?

YUZURU

_Maybe._

 

PAULINE is finally back and she calls YUZURU, who goes to meet her without saying anything else. JAVIER watches the two of them holding hands and walk _el Paseo de Cuba_ without once looking back. JAVIER lights a cigarette and walks on the opposite direction, the momentarily naked image of the young angel still haunting him. He finds himself repeating the name YUZU each time he exhales the nicotine veil.


	2. Chapter II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Of unexpected change of plans, golden eyes and death, and conversations at the train.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here come's the second chapter. I don't have much to say this time except that this might because some sort of slow (well medium) burn and that writing dialogue is definitely a HUGE challenge. I'm no expert in religion or forensics so please forgive me for any wrong or not credible information. 
> 
> The usual disclaimer applies. This is entirely a work of fiction and in no ways reflect the people mentioned here. It is purely a work of my imagination which is not soaring much at the moment.

7\. EXT. IN FRONT OF SANTIAGO BERNABÉU STADIUM. EARLY EVENING

The sun is still held high on the sky though its radiating brilliance is already gone. There are numerous large buses, tourism buses, parked just outside the stadium. A few sports cars as well. JAVIER leans on the shadow of a nearby tree on the berm, finishing his cigarette while waiting for RAYA. Although they shared the same first name, they couldn’t be more different. RAYA is more extrovert, his mouth lacking a proper mental filter, but he is honest and one of the kindest souls in the universe. They had been through the same high school and then both stepped into the armed forces academy together.

RAYA, 27, arrives slightly out of breath, his hands shoved in his trench coat, like a typical detective from criminal dramas. A lot of people also swarm from the metro station but JAVIER spots his friend immediately.

 

JAVIER

You’re late.

RAYA

There are always tons of people at this hour. And you’re not necessarily the epitome of punctuality.

JAVIER

(trying to hide a little of his embarrassment because he knows the remark is true)

You know, girls really hate men who don’t know how to read a watch.

RAYA

You _look_ exactly what I had hoped for a date too.

JAVIER

She said I was a nymphomaniac today.

RAYA

(laughing like he had heard a very good joke)

Sorry babe. I’m looking for true love. _El amor eterno_.

JAVIER

Yeah. Anything that can make your little boy pole vault.

RAYA

Hey! It could win the Olympics on the marathon.

 

JAVIER takes one last drag of his cigarette and throws the stub in the ashtray depression on top of the garbage tin. He elbows RAYA straight in the ribs.

 

JAVIER

We hope then you’ll never switch to being a _sprinter_.

 

Both men stop at the zebra crossing, waiting for the traffic light to change green for pedestrians, alongside a group of people, most of them wearing some sort of _Real Madrid_ memorabilia, though there are fans of _Manchester United_ as well. On the opposite side of the street, JAVIER notices ELIZA. Her mascara is all over her face, mixed with tears, and her eyes are lifeless, devoid of any human emotion. She continues walking, even when a bicycle knocks her to the ground. She stays there, still.

The light turns green. JAVIER runs to her, leaving RAYA behind.

RAYA

(Raising his voice) Where are you going man?

JAVIER

(putting a hand on ELIZA’s shoulder)

Eliza, are you okay?

 

ELIZA yanks from his touch with a hysterical grunt. She crawls on her knees. They are bleeding and the blood stains her pants. JAVIER can smell it perfectly, even amidst the different perfumes, sweat, and exhaustion fumes from the cars. He can almost tell how much she is bleeding.

 

JAVIER

(kneeling in front of her and with both hands on her shoulders)

Eliza! It’s me, Javi.

 

ELIZA stops JAVIER, her hand striking his face painfully hard. Some people on the street laugh about the situation and some take pictures with their smartphones. ELIZA goes for a second hit but JAVIER holds her by the wrists.

 

ELIZA

Javi? Is that you? Why are you here? Why is it not _her_? Let me go!

JAVIER

You’re not going anywhere alone in this state.

ELIZA

Let me go! Please. (She sobs crazily in Javier’s arms)

 

RAYA finally reaches them and has deduced who ELIZA is. He exchanges looks with JAVIER who looks apologetic. A gleam of annoyance flashes through RAYA’s face but it soon morphs into understanding.

 

RAYA

I’ll drink a glass of _cava_ for you. Call me if you need help.

JAVIER

Thanks brother. I owe you one.

RAYA

Wait until you receive your paycheck.

 

RAYA winks at JAVIER and helps him lift ELIZA to her feet. She is completely oblivious to his presence. RAYA turns around, one last nod to JAVIER and walks towards the stadium. He takes out his phone and goes through his list of contacts. He remembers that SARA actually lives one block away and calls her.

 

RAYA

(On the phone) _Oy_ Sara, I’m actually standing in front of...

 

Where they were left of, JAVIER hugs ELIZA, who is still crying but less impulsively and more contained. She realizes the red finger marks on JAVIER’s face is her doing.

 

ELIZA

I’m sorry. I’m so sorry Javi. I didn’t mean to.

JAVIER

 _No pasa nada_. Can you walk?

ELIZA

I don’t know what came to me. I’m sorry.

JAVIER

Do you want to grab something to eat? There is a café around here that does amazing _bocadillos_ for my stomach and terrible for your diet.

ELIZA

(smiling amidst her tears)

I’m not hungry.

JAVIER

Let’s go anyway. I want to be with you.

 

They both walk away from the stadium, not an inch of their bodies touching.

8\. INT. CAFÉ LUZ. EVENING.

Most of the tables are empty, except for a family of three sharing an extra-large size pizza, a lonely girl at the center scribbling on her minuscule notepad, and an old couple toasting to some date only known to them. JAVIER and ELIZA choose to sit at the table furthest away from the entrance and the glass panes looking to the exterior. ELIZA is wearing shades and she excuses herself to the washroom to retouch her makeup for damage control. The space is dimly lit, almost too dark to notice the other costumers. It creates an artificial sense of intimacy that JAVIER is very used to. He scans the menu when RIVERDANCE is played. Without realizing it, a smile creeps on his face – it’s the same song YUZURU danced that morning.

ELIZA returns, her face without a single hint she had been crying.

 

ELIZA

Is there something funny on the paper?

JAVIER

(putting down the menu and following all her movements)

No. It’s just a song that I know.

ELIZA

I don’t like it. (She skips the pages for entrées and goes directly for the drinks)

JAVIER

Why? Doesn’t it sound... _cultural_?

ELIZA gestures for the WAITER who smiles politely at her but his gaze falls heavy on JAVIER. ELIZA intuitively deduces the sexual orientation of the WAITER.

 

WAITER

Are you ready to order?

ELIZA

Yes, a _White Russian_. And make that a double shot of vodka.

WAITER

I’m sorry ma’am but the bar only opens at 9. Would you like a glass of wine perhaps?

ELIZA

 _No._ Can’t you just slip this one and open that bottle of vodka?

WAITER

I am really sorry, but-

ELIZA

(cutting his words and holding the WAITER by his wrist, making him almost drop his pen)

 _Listen_ , just write down the name of something else on those white greasy sheets. I don’t care what, put the most expensive bottle if you want, _Dom Pérignon_ , _Billecart-Salmon_ , whatever you can think of.

JAVIER

Eliza, calm down please.

ELIZA

I _am_ calm. Well, dear Mr. Waiter, turn around, get your ass behind that counter, shake it because you do have a nice ass, then open that bottle of vodka, the fourth one from the right I can see clearly, and make that goddamn _Russian_.

 

JAVIER removes ELIZA’s hand from the WAITER. The service boy has his wrist red from pressure from her and JAVIER finds himself caressing the bruised skin as an apology.

 

JAVIER

I’m sorry for the lady. She had a pretty bad day. I would like the household sangria, with extra slices of lemon. And could you please see if your manager would kindly make the cocktail for this distressed lady? I promise you won’t be in trouble. It could be our little secret.

 

The WAITER is blushing, JAVIER finds him cute, and he removes his hand with a final sorry. The young boy says he will try and JAVIER genuinely smiles.

 

ELIZA

He likes you.

JAVIER

(pretending to ignore the remark)

Are you feeling better? Where does all this anger come from?

 

The song in the café changes to Ludovico Einaudi’s EXPERIENCE.

 

ELIZA

I’m glad they changed it. I really didn’t like it. A pagan offering to the sun.

JAVIER

It’s just a song.

ELIZA

I still don’t like it.

JAVIER

So what do you like? _Her?_

 

ELIZA falls silent. When she is ready to speak again, the WAITER comes with their drinks, a glass of sangria and a beautifully layered _White Russian_. ELIZA thanks him and she too apologizes for her previous outburst, the blush of embarrassment on her cheeks a real one. She takes a sip of her cocktail, she closes her eyes at the rush of alcohol through her nose, straight to her temples, and tears well up again.

 

ELIZA

I like you Javi.

JAVIER

You know that’s not true.

ELIZA

I love you Javi. (She is being honest) So much. But you will never be like her.

JAVIER

Who is this _she_ , Eliza? Who is she to you?

 

ELIZA really cries. Her sobs are quiet as she tries to suppress them and diffused along the piano notes of DIVENIRE. JAVIER doesn’t make an effort to reach for her. He doesn’t know why.

 

ELIZA

Have you ever seen an angel?

 

For the first time of the evening, JAVIER averts her gaze as if she was prying in something very private of him. The image of a naked YUZURU appears vividly and the patterns of the wooden floor looked like the python crawling on his pale skin. JAVIER corrects his sitting posture and takes a sip of his sangria.

 

JAVIER

Angels don’t exist.

ELIZA

They do if you look for them. (She plays with the medallion of her bracelet) _She_ is perfect.

JAVIER

She’s your angel?

ELIZA

(shaking her head) I _am_ her angel.

 

JAVIER looks confused. The old couple leaves the café and he is distracted momentarily by the sound of doors opening and closing.

 

ELIZA (CONT’D)

She set me free. I don’t want my wings back.

 

JAVIER swears he can’t see them on her back.

 

ELIZA (CONT’D)

(she takes a last mouthful of her _White Russian_ and the glass hits the table top harder and louder than she expected)

She asked me to die.

JAVIER

Eliza-

ELIZA

I’ll grant her any wish she wants.

JAVIER

Don’t be silly.

ELIZA

Do you think I won’t do it?

 

JAVIER sincerely doesn’t know how to answer so he doesn’t. He changes the conversation to her newest play, to the favorable reviews it has received. He jokes about RAYA’s latest attempts in trying to woe girls, about his own aching muscles from falling too much on the skating rink near his home. All this communicative exchange is too artificial and neither are truly invested in pursuing it. ELIZA nods along and laughs when she thinks she should. JAVIER pays for the drinks and they leave.

9\. INT. JAVIER’S ROOM. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. NIGHT.

JAVIER and ELIZA are both in bed, naked. She is more passionate than before and takes control of the situation. Neither of them speaks or trades sweet words and promises. ELIZA rides JAVIER. Their bodies respond to the love making but both their minds are not there. For the first time, JAVIER thinks she is obnoxiously loud and he wishes she would lose her voice so the high-pitched cries would cease. He closes his eyes.

10\. EXT. FOREST. NIGHT.

It’s the same place where JAVIER first saw the dead gazelle. The carcass is still there but only the skeleton is left and a few patches of gnawed flesh. It is almost completely decayed. He does not feel sick. Instead, a morbid fascination with the corpse attracts him. He walks deeper into the trees until a VOICE stops him.

 

VOICE IN THE DARK

DON’T cross the line stranger.

 

JAVIER stares further in the complete darkness and notices a pair of golden eyes. He trembles at the sight of them.

 

JAVIER

Am I dreaming?

VOICE/EYES

(very irritated)

You! You of all people are asking this. Wake up! This is reality! Your reality!

 

The VOICE sounds very familiar but JAVIER can’t remember from whom.

 

JAVIER

What are you?

VOICE/EYES

I am me. You are you, stranger.

JAVIER

Come out.

VOICE/EYES

I can’t. You’re the one that needs to come in.

 

The pair of eyes disappear in the darkness. A very subtle trail of vanilla is left.

11\. INT. JAVIER’S ROOM. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. EARLY MORNING.

JAVIER wakes up, his eyes refusing to adjust to the sunrays that enter his room. He doesn’t open his eyes, but his consciousness tells him he is not dreaming anymore. The faint scent of jasmine is what makes him raise his eyelids. Jasmine, not vanilla. ELIZA is not in the room and the other half of JAVIER’s double-sized bed is perfectly made, not a simple wrinkle in the sheets. There is no sign that she was ever there. JAVIER is also surprisingly clean, no stickiness running down his manhood or between his thighs. His phone rings.

 

RAYA (V.O.)

Where are you Javi?

JAVIER

(in a rather dry/coarse voice of someone who didn’t sleep well)

Home. Where do you expect me to be?

RAYA (V.O.)

Where did you go with that woman last night?

JAVIER

We didn’t go anywhere.

RAYA (V.O.)

 _Where_ did you go last night?

JAVIER

My room. I slept. Is this a crime now?

RAYA (V.O.)

Turn on the TV.

 

JAVIER doesn’t understand the intrusive questionnaire but does as RAYA says. The remote control lies in the bedside cabinet. JAVIER stretches his arm to get it and pulls a muscle, cursing under the pain.

 

NEWS REPORTER (ON TV)

...was found dead in her apartment. The actress was last seen entering the building at 4:16 this morning...

 

JAVIER does not recognize the victim shown on TV. He has a feeling that he should.

 

JAVIER

Who is she?

RAYA (V.O.)

Jesus, Javi! Did you guys fight or what?

 

JAVIER doesn’t answer. He continues listening to the news, which mostly revolve around ‘suicide’, ‘overdose’ and ‘pictures of angels’.

 

RAYA (V.O.) (CONT’D)

It’s that crying lady that slapped you! I’m pretty sure there are photos of you too online.

 

JAVIER lifts his hand to his cheek but there is no residual pain.

 

JAVIER

If this is a bad joke-

RAYA (V.O.)

Wake up you bastard! She is _dead_!

JAVIER

(raising his voice) I got _that_! Stop barking.

RAYA (V.O.)

Fuck you. Are you still going to pretend you don’t know her?

JAVIER

She is not the one.

RAYA (V.O.)

She is not?

JAVIER

No.

RAYA (V.O.)

Is this game?

JAVIER

(almost shouting)

What’s all this interrogation for? Do you think I killed her?

RAYA (V.O.)

(taken aback and changing to a more understanding tone)

No. I- Javi, you’re my best friend. I worry about you.

JAVIER

(feeling guilty)

Sorry. I just feel cornered. (He looks again at the TV with no avail) I really can’t remember her.

RAYA (V.O)

Is this the truth?

JAVIER

I’m not lying.

RAYA (V.O.)

You’re scaring me man. (after a short pause) Brian wants us both in an hour on his office. (after another pause) Try to remember Javi.

 

JAVIER ends the call. He pulls his curly locks as if they would rewind his memories from last night. Gold, vanilla, he thinks of these. The name ELIZA doesn’t belong to him.

12\. INT. SUBWAY CAR. MORNING.

JAVIER sits in the empty seat closest to the sliding doors. It’s one of the worst hours to catch any sort of public transportation. The carriage reeks of all sorts of eau de toilette, grease on leather shoes, hair waxes, sweat and an underground smell of dirt and dust. The stress of white collar, cheap suits workers is palpable, while high school students lean on the metal poles, giggling about the content on their phones. JAVIER looks absently at the people who enter and leave the car. Red hair and freckles, purple-dyed waves, a bald man with the arms fully tattooed, none of them reminds JAVIER of the person he was with last night, if any.

On the station of _Nuevos Ministerios_ , the majority of the people leave and PAULINE sits across JAVIER. She is alone and she looks chirpy, typical of a child. JAVIER recognizes and goes to sit next to her.

 

PAULINE

Hello, Mr. Stranger. (she recognizes him as well and smiles widely)

JAVIER

Going to school?

PAULINE

I don’t go to school.

JAVIER

All kids go to school. Your mommy will be mad if you skip.

PAULINE

Mommy just died.

 

JAVIER is incredulous at first but he still feels guilty for his words, and the last thing he wants is for people to accuse him as a bully, or even worse, a pedophile. PAULINE is surprisingly calm and keeps playing with the butterfly bow on her dress.

 

PAULINE (CONT’D)

But I have Yuzu. Yuzu makes me happy.

JAVIER

Is Yuzu your brother?

PAULINE

No. You saw him. He’s an angel.

 

The image of a naked YUZURU with the python appears in JAVIER’s mind. The python moves all over his body and he sees more in this vision. He blushes at the thought. He wonders if PAULINE has seen the same. Of course not. She couldn’t have had, could she?

 

PAULINE

Yuzu doesn’t talk to people. But he likes me. And you.

JAVIER

Me?

PAULINE

Ask him. He will tell you.

JAVIER

What?

PAULINE

Anything. Yuzu knows everything.

JAVIER

(pondering about his apparent loss of memory)

Because he’s an angel?

PAULINE

(Shrugs shoulders)

Because he’s smart. Father Shem says he’s very smart.

 

The train stops. It’s not yet his target station but PAULINE drags him from his seat.

 

PAULINE (CONT’D)

Come. You want to ask him something, don’t you?

 

JAVIER takes PAULINE’s hand and nods mentally. She looks genuinely cheerful and elated that he is following her.


	3. Chapter III

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Of secret commandments, sensual rituals and leaps of faith.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This has somehow become an outlet of ideas that seem to flourish from my latest cycling adventures. I apologize if it's confusing but everything will be solved eventually.
> 
> Also, I'm not using this to promote or critique religion of any sorts. All the religious elements here serve the purpose to drive the plot forward and not to make any judgement. 
> 
> Enjoy!

13\. EXT. PUBLIC SQUARE. DAY.

PAULINE guides JAVIER to the front steps of a church. The façade of the spiritual building is made of large slabs of stone, worn out from time. The Baroque architecture is still very clear on the columns, on the hoods of the main door and windows, and on the cupola of the twin bell towers. PAULINE continues walking, holding JAVIER’s hand but she stops at the side door, which happens to be open. It faces a dilapidated wall of a restaurant-bar. The crown of the tree of the establishment looms over to their side and provides a mushroom-shaped space of shadow. PAULINE raises three fingers to JAVIER, who is definitely way taller than her.

 

PAULINE

You can only enter if you promise to honor the three commandments.

JAVIER

(curious) What commandments?

PAULINE

(her hands are very animated and she moves constantly)

Don’t make any noise. If we’re discovered, we will be in trouble.

JAVIER

That’s an easy one.

PAULINE

(raising one finger to her mouth and whispering)

Shh! They will hear us.

 

JAVIER keeps observing her antics, especially her adult-like attitude, a poor imitation that is nevertheless very endearing.

 

PAULINE (CONT’D)

Don’t ask me anything. I know nothing.

JAVIER

(nodding) And the final one?

 

PAULINE hesitates. She looks down at her strap espadrilles. She finally looks her age, an urgent necessity to quickly grow up.

 

PAULINE

Don’t take Yuzu away from me.

 

14\. INT. GROUND FLOOR. BAROQUE CHURCH. MOMENTS LATER.

JAVIER and PAULINE tiptoe in order to avoid any sort of noise. The air inside is warm, not stiff, but the frankincense smell makes JAVIER’s stomach curl. The interior is larger than it seems from the outside. At the central altar in the sanctuary, YUZURU wipes with a white cloth the tabernacle. He is careful with it but he is clearly more interested in the contents it lodges.

PAULINE pulls JAVIER behind a large column, enough to hide them both as she hears STEPS. YUZURU looks at their direction and JAVIER gets a quick glimpse of him before PAULINE kicks him on the shin and he recoils further into the narrow cover of the pillar. He has no idea why they are hiding.

YUZURU continues and he now stares at the golden chalice, studying the inscriptions with a meticulous attention. He pours sacramental wine into it and brings it to his lips. The first sip is tentative, enough to only wet his lips. He licks them. He bites his lower lip as he smiles. He drinks more wine. JAVIER notices his Adam’s apple bobbing with each gulp and the waxing bliss on his face.

The sun rays penetrate through the stained glass. YUZURU basks on the red and blue refracted lights and those colors turn him almost into an apparition, a creature out of this world.

FATHER SHEM enters the sanctuary through the opposite side. He is a man in his mid-forties, of tall stature, almost imposing. His hair is brown like JAVIER’s but a good amount of white hairs contrast with his all black cassock. His steps are light but enough for YUZURU to put down the chalice.

 

YUZURU

Father. You came back early.

FATHER SHEM

Did you try it?

YUZURU

(hesitating) Yes. A little.

FATHER SHEM

Pure?

YUZURU

Yes. (He licks his lips as if he didn’t want to let the taste fade away) I’m sorry.

FATHER SHEM

_Keep your servant from willful sins, they rule not over me._

YUZURU

_Then I will be blameless, innocent of great transgression._

 

FATHER SHEM smiles compassionately at YUZURU and extends both his hands to him. YUZURU takes them and plants a kiss on each.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

Forgive me Father.

FATHER SHEM

There’s nothing to forgive, my beautiful boy.

 

JAVIER observes the scene with apprehension, his eyes witnessing something he shouldn’t have seen in the serenity of the church. His phone vibrates which scares PAULINE. Her startling made her move away from the hideout.

 

FATHER SHEM/YUZURU

(in unison) Pauline!

 

PAULINE prepares to run away but YUZURU calls her again.

 

YUZURU

Wait! Don’t go!

PAULINE

(shouting) I don’t want to go back! I won’t!

YUZURU

(walking towards her)

Didn’t you say we we’re going to be together?

PAULINE

(trembling) They will take me away.

YUZURU

I won’t let them take my princess.

FATHER

You can’t stay here Pauline. Your mother-

PAULINE

(crying) Dead! Dead! She lied! (more tears) You all lie!

 

PAULINE suddenly grabs JAVIER’s arm and pulls him towards her as if he was the only trustworthy person in the moment. JAVIER is speechless. FATHER SHEM is surprised by his presence, unlike YUZURU who seems pleased and overjoyed.

 

YUZURU

(to himself)

Mr. Stranger.

PAULINE

(looking at YUZURU but holding JAVIER’s arm)

Please.

YUZURU

(in a very soft tone)

Come here.

 

PAULINE doesn’t move, confused about what she should do. YUZURU crouches in front of her and hugs her. She is initially reluctant but embraces him soon with the same candor, finally letting go of JAVIER’s arm. JAVIER’s eyes meets YUZURU’s, who is kneeling right in front of him. His upward gaze is intense, almost arrogant, like he knew JAVIER was hidden there all the time. His lips are crimson red, tinged with alcohol. JAVIER tries to avert his gaze but finds himself even more locked into it.

For a very brief instant, PAULINE’s thin arms around YUZURU’s neck are like a serpent resting peacefully on his shoulders.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

I’m so sorry Pauline.

PAULINE

(amidst her tears) Yuzu... Yuzu... Yuzu...

FATHER SHEM

I was looking for you this whole morning.

 

PAULINE shakes her head continuously. YUZURU stands up but her grip on his waist is strong and unbreakable.

 

YUZURU

Isn’t there any other way Father? She could be with me.

FATHER SHEM

She’s a minor Yuzuru. It’s the law.

 

JAVIER doesn’t know why he spurts the next words but he feels the urge to. Maybe it’s because PAULINE is a child or because he used to cry the same way with LAURA. This is also the first time that he hears Yuzuru’s full name and not the shortened variation.

 

JAVIER

She is going to stay with me.

 

Everyone looks at him, inclusive PAULINE whose breathing has subsided into a calmer state.

 

JAVIER (CONT’D)

I’m... I’m her uncle. Her mother and I weren’t very close but she trusted me. It’s in the blood she used to say. I must apologize for all the distress.

 

JAVIER swallows hard. His palms are sweating and the frankincense is finally a tranquilizer and not the initial nausea inducing chemical.

 

JAVIER (CONT’D)

I want Pauline to stay with me. (looking at her) If she wants.

 

The approval he is looking for is not from her. PAULINE looks at YUZURU. He doesn’t say a word but pats her head and the touch is warm. She leans in it and nods affirmatively to JAVIER.

 

FATHER SHEM

(not fully convinced) A child is not a crossword puzzle on a newspaper Mr.-

JAVIER

Fernández.

 

It’s the first time we learn of JAVIER’s surname. He is not comfortable enough to reveal his forename.

 

FATHER SHEM

Mr. Fernández. (He notices the rosary) I hope you understand-

JAVIER

(interrupting) I do. Even the commandments.

 

JAVIER and PAULINE share a smile. It’s only theirs. A secret from YUZURU too. This thought made him quite thrilled, to know that he could have something that was a mystery for Yuzuru, just how he was an enigma thrust into his life without permission.

 

FATHER SHEM

The time will come when everything will become clear. But for now, there is a soul awaiting guidance. I’m so sorry for your loss.

 

JAVIER nods, the most appropriate response he can deduce. His loss, her loss, their loss, who knows whose loss? YUZURU mutters something to PAULINE and she reluctantly follows FATHER SHEM. She leaves with a final ‘thank you’.

 

15\. INT. LEFT AISLE. CHURCH. IMMEDIATELY AFTER THE CONFRONTATION.

This is seen from JAVIER’s perspective/eyes. There are rows and rows of empty, varnished benches, adorned with bouquets of fresh daisies. We see statues of angels, some wingless and solemnly crying, some sternly staring back with a condescending I-know-your-sins attitude. Most are real human size, if not bigger, their shadows looming over in a menacing tension. The focus shifts to the colorful spots on the velvet carpet from the stained-glass panes. These depict episodes from the gospel that JAVIER knows well but he doesn’t have time to relive them as he hurries to follow YUZURU, who is walking towards the room in the corner. He follows in silence. He needs answers but he doesn’t ask questions.

 

16\. INT. STAIRS TO THE MEZZANINE FLOOR. CHURCH.

They walk up the spiral steps. The wood creaks as they climb. The room is very dark and JAVIER almost falls from a missed step. He still stumbles and cuts his ring finger in the handrail but luckily there is not splinter.

 

YUZURU

You’re quite the liar, Mr. Stranger.

JAVIER

What did you expect me to do? To leave her alone when she reached out for me?

YUZURU

You know nothing. About her. About us.

JAVIER

Maybe I want to know more.

 

YUZURU stops and turns around. They are of the same height but on the upper steps, he looks much taller. He lifts both his feet and balances only with the grip on the handrail. The whole structure shakes slightly and he might fall forward any moment. JAVIER instinctively opens his arms to catch him in case he does.

It would be one hell of a painful fall for both. Literally and metaphorically.

 

YUZURU

Why are you so interested?

 

JAVIER doesn’t answer. Not to someone who can see right through his lies.

 

17\. INT. MEZZANINE FLOOR. CHURCH.

It’s almost some sort of balcony that oversees the communal area below. An organ with huge pipes is in the middle just below another extremely large cross. YUZURU sits in front of the wind instrument and presses down a random key. The sound reverberates throughout the whole church. JAVIER’s whole body shivers, as if that key had been hammered directly on his eardrums.

 

YUZURU

A prayer for the departed.

 

YUZURU plays AVE MARIA by Schubert in a distinctively morose and listless pace, each single note held longer than usual. The song is reduced to a sequence of wails and laments. It’s not an offering to the dead but a cry of help from YUZURU.

JAVIER presses down a key, breaking the musicality and the song altogether. Yuzuru doesn’t look annoyed, just puzzled.

 

JAVIER

Did you know her?

YUZURU

She used to come for the music.

JAVIER

Play something... (he ponders) happier. For her.

 

‘For yourself’ is what he wants to say but he doesn’t.

 

YUZURU

I don’t take requests.

 

YUZURU plays again and it is certainly more cheerful this time. Even the tempo. The chords to the HALLELUJAH chorus from MESSIAH by Händel are repetitive but each iteration is different. It’s loud and soft, it’s rushed and then seductively bewitching.

Not the song but YUZURU. His fingers caress the same combination of keys but his body sways with the melody. He shifts on the stool, thrusts forward and retreats backward immediately after, his eyes closed, his teeth biting his lower lips until it’s vivid red, his legs opening wider and wider, even though pedaling. The hymn ends on a high note and a moan of the same intensity.

YUZURU doesn’t play music. He feels it in his bones.

JAVIER is terrified at the ferocity but also at the sensuality the thin and frail body siting at the organ emanates.

 

YUZURU

They say it was suicide.

JAVIER

(still shaken from the just finished song)

What?

YUZURU

Pauline’s mother. Such an obedience. What a waste of life.

 

JAVIER finally connects the loose breadcrumbs left by fate. Young woman, suicide, news on the TV. Was she the same person he had miraculously forgotten?

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

I never talked to her. She used to talk to me.

JAVIER

(suddenly feeling guilty)

Did she ever mention someone? A friend? A lover?

YUZURU

(smirking) She never rambled about you, _Javier._

 

For those paying attention, Javier has not yet introduced his name so far. He doesn’t pay attention too.

 

JAVIER

My colleague says we used to sleep together.

YUZURU

(playing a few keys on the lower octaves)

Maybe you were.

JAVIER

I don’t know.

YUZURU

Does it matter?

JAVIER

She’s dead.

YUZURU

(repeating himself) Does it matter?

 

YUZURU stands up holds JAVIER’s hand, leading him to the railing overlooking the sanctuary and the rows of praying benches.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

What do you want Mr. Stranger?

 

JAVIER looks down. It’s not particularly high and he doesn’t have acrophobia but where they are standing gives him a vertiginous sensation. He is glad YUZURU is holding his hand. He can still feel the ecstatic pulse on his fingertips. He interlaces their fingers for no apparent reason besides the desire of wanting to do it.

 

JAVIER

What can you offer?

 

YUZURU lets go of the hand and stands behind JAVIER. JAVIER feels exposed, naked, even fully clothed, and anxiety creeps through his pores. He relaxes when YUZURU’s hand slides down his spine and up again, resting between his shoulder blades.

 

YUZURU

A leap of faith.

 

And he pushes JAVIER forward. There is no time for him to grab the railing and he topples over, falling to the ground floor. He closes his eyes to welcome the impact.

 

18\. BLACK/DARKNESS

Everything is dark. Nothing can be seen. Only sounds can be heard. The sound of raindrops against the window, the sound of a piece of wood splitting under fire, the sound of a coffee mill grinding beans, RIVERDANCE, a woman crying, HALLELUJAH, YUZURU moaning, YUZURU’s voice saying incoherent things. Did he die?

 

YUZURU (O.S.)

Open your eyes.

 

19\. INT. GROUND FLOOR. CHURCH.

 

YUZURU (O.S.)

Open your eyes.

 

JAVIER slowly opens his eyes. The rush of light is too strong and he squishes them hard again. He wishes he hadn’t. The pain on his lower body is excruciating that tears pour without warning. He tries to move but a single twitch of muscle is enough to send another stabbing agony to his lungs, constricting them, not allowing him to breathe. He opens his eyes again, the tears burning his irises, and he sees red.

 

YUZURU

Give me your hands.

 

JAVIER notices that YUZURU is kneeling next to him and that he too has tears running down his cheeks.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

Give me your hands. Let me save you.

 

JAVIER lifts only one, his left arm dislocated at the shoulder. He wonders why YUZURU is crying but that sight of him in distress was even more beautiful than before. Maybe he’s really an angel.

YUZURU kisses his hands, like he did to FATHER SHEM, but slower, one palm at a time. The caress is remarkably tender.

 

JAVIER

(barely audible) Why are you crying?

 

It’s all black again.

 

20\. TOTAL DARKNESS. LOST IN TIME.

It’s all completely black. JAVIER is floating, levitating in all the dark surroundings, or lack of it. He is no longer in pain. This is all seen through his eyes. His hands appear, barely visible, only a contour. He waves them without difficulty and his legs too crisscross whatever space he’s in. Perhaps this was the real after life people talked about. Maybe he would find her here too and so he could finally ask who she is. Or was.

But she is not here. What he sees though is a pair of golden eyes. He still can’t see the face clearly, but a body embraces his and he returns the same gesture. He feels a pair of lips on his. The golden eyes kiss him and he does the same. Why it has to be so dark he wonders. He wants to see and not be blind.

The other body continues pressing down on him, needy, rummaging his nakedness. JAVIER feels himself responding to it, adrenaline and ecstasy replacing his blood.

And then it’s gone. The sexual urge and the golden eyes. And the vanilla trail.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> O.S./V.O. - Off Screen/Voice Over


	4. Chapter IV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Of decaffeinated adventures and vanilla pancakes, broken glass and first kisses.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's never enough to remind people that this is strictly a work of fiction. It is a work of my imagination and since it is an AU, I have the liberties to shape the world I want it to be. 
> 
> This chapter came out longer than I had expected. Blame the stress from exams. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

21\. INT. SUBWAY CAR. DAY.

JAVIER is sitting with PAULINE near the junction of two cars. It’s less crowded than before. He finally checks his phone – it’s almost half past nine, a few missed calls and more than 30 unread messages. He clears the record without sparing a glance at them. There is a certain irony to it. He is the adult but the one behaving like a child, unwilling to admit he did something wrong.

He leans back on the seat, his head bumping into the locked glass panel full of scribbles in white ink from correction pens. It doesn’t hurt at all but he hisses anyway, as if the memory of the fall before was imprinted in all his muscles and it still boiled at the surface of his skin. He literally hears and smells the following – the milliseconds before the impact, the bones moving out of their joints and cracking, shattering so easily, the blood, viscous and pungent, spurting from wherever there was an opening.

A FLASHBACK OR A DREAM WITH EYES WIDE OPEN

JAVIER wakes up, extended on the floor of the church. YUZURU is gone. He looks around, utterly confused. His body shows no sign of any injury and he can move freely, even perhaps better than before. His hands are slightly wet, only on some spots. He brings them to his lips – salty. YUZURU was crying he remembers.

Were this saltiness his tears? He licks them.

BACK TO THE PRESENT

JAVIER is staring at the young girl sitting in front of him, his teeth biting his lower lip, still tasting the trance. She winks at him, to which he blushes for the suggestive nature of his gesture and he lowers his eyes to his own leather shoes. PAULINE holds his hand, sensing something in the silence.

 

PAULINE

Yuzu will come back. He likes me. And you.

 

JAVIER smiles. It’s genuine but also uneasy. _He almost killed me_ , he thinks, and it’s clearly written on his face. He squeezes her little hand nonetheless.

 

PAULINE (CONT’D)

You saw it, didn’t it?

 

JAVIER lingers about the answer but their stop is announced as the car screeches and halts. PAULINE pulls him out, she jumping on her espadrilles and he carefully watching so she won’t fall on the platform.

22\. INT. UNDERGROUND SUBWAY STATION. DAY

JAVIER and PAULINE talk a lot as they go through stairs and long corridors. There are a few musicians with open guitar cases, only a few coins in them, and large advertisement posters on both sides. They don’t pay attention to any of them. Instead, they ramble about cats, their favorite food, the best ice-cream flavor, how PAULINE hates math. JAVIER learns that she does go to school but the institution is closed at the moment for renovations.

As they stand still on the ascending escalator, PAULINE one step ahead so she could appear to be taller, JAVIER notices two men, probably his age, happily talking and holding hands, oblivious to the condescending stares of passersby.

YUZURU was holding his hand too. And kissing them.

He’s not trying to eavesdrop but the couple’s voices are loud.

 

YOUNG MAN #1

Are you okay with us going?

YOUNG MAN #2

You said you wanted to see her.

YOUNG MAN #1

I don’t want you to be jealous.

YOUNG MAN #2

You don’t stop talking about this _Lady Fox_ since that night.

YOUNG MAN #1

Which night?

 

They all step out and they head in the same direction. JAVIER feels like he’s prying into an intimate conversation. They could be more discrete if they actually cared about it.

Which they don’t.

 

YOUNG MAN #2

When you almost came just by watching her. Your sister told me.

YOUNG MAN #1

You’re jealous.

YOUNG MAN #2

You bet I am.

 

Both men suddenly stop in front of JAVIER and PAULINE bumps into them. They apologize for their stunt and quickly run to the nearest public washroom. The accessible one. JAVIER can deduce a make-out session. He had tried before too. PAULINE’s hold on his fingers reminds him he should not be thinking of sex right now. They leave the station.

23\. EXT. STREET IN FRONT OF POLICE FORCES. DAY.

It’s a comfortably hot day. JAVIER lifts his hands to block the sun from his eyes. He has some difficulty adjusting to the brightness after the dimly lit subway walk. His stomach suddenly groans. Both he and PAULINE can hear it, even with the cacophony of the steps of other people and the fluttering tree branches of nearby trees. He goes for the packet of cigarettes in his pocket but lets them go when PAULINE laughs. He blushes a little.

 

PAULINE

Are you hungry?

 

Her stomach makes the same noise, if not louder.

 

JAVIER

(chuckling) Do you want to eat something?

 

PAULINE nods yes very enthusiastically and they enter the closest café.

24\. INT. RUSTIC STYLED CAFÉ. DAY.

PAULINE finds an empty table and just requests for something sweet. JAVIER lines in the queue, observing her as she sits on the wooden chair, her feet dangling from its height and readjusting her dress to cover her tanned knees. She waves at him, unabashedly and innocently happy, and JAVIER wonders if this is what YUZURU likes the most about her – a contagious ability to cleanse one’s soul with her smile.

He receives an incoming message. Two actually.

 

RAYA (MESSAGE)

Should I call INTERPOL to find you?

BRIAN (MESSAGE)

I hope you’ll have the decency to tell me why you’re so late. This is not you Javier. Tracy is even more worried than I am.

 

JAVIER would sure bring RAYA to a kickboxing session later and beat him to purée but for now he ignored him. He calls Brian. He still wanted his job. He loved it. He can’t afford to lose it now that he has to take care of a child.

A child. Not his child. Why did he care so much?

 

JAVIER (ON THE PHONE)

Brian, I’m so sorry. I’m not running away. I’m sorry.

 

BRIAN’s voice over the phone is calm and composed. He only asks where he is right now. JAVIER senses the worry and the relief in his words. He blushes further from shame and guilt.

 

JAVIER (ON THE PHONE)

I’m sorry. I just need to feed my... my niece. You can yell at me all you want later. Just give more time.

 

Surprisingly, BRIAN agrees and tells him to eat properly. He cuts the line and it’s already his turn to order. The waitress is a young girl, probably a university student. She has noticed PAULINE and says something along the lines of how cute she looks. Probably for some tip.

 

WAITRESS

And lucky to have such a handsome father.

 

JAVIER opens his mouth to disagree but decides not to. He just looks at the menu while she waits for his order in front of the touch screen monitor.

 

JAVIER

A strawberry milkshake with yogurt.

WAITRESS

And chocolate on top?

JAVIER

Yes, please. And... (he scans the menu again, not finding anything particularly sweet)... what do kids like to eat for breakfast?

WAITRESS

(Taken aback by the question)

How about pancakes? Most children love them and you can choose one topping for free (she gestures at the different options).

JAVIER

Then I guess it’s pancakes. Banana and cinnamon.

WAITRESS

And for you?

JAVIER

Just coffee. Plain.

 

She inputs all the items and gives him the bill.

 

JAVIER (CONT’D)

Sorry. Could you make that decaffeinated?

 

He pays and sits next to PAULINE. She has made a few cranes with the paper napkins. Three is the exact number. Two big ones and a small one.

The waitress comes with his order and PAULINE literally beams with joy at the sight of the sugar saturation she will get. She slurps loudly on the straw of her milkshake while JAVIER adds a packet of brown sugar to his bitter choice. Decaffeinated surely tasted the same as normal coffee. PAULINE cuts a square of her pancake and offers it to JAVIER. He bites from her fork. It’s banana, cinnamon and vanilla syrup.

He promised BRIAN to meet him soon. But he can’t rush PAULINE and he truly enjoys breakfast for the first time. Maybe this is why YUZURU likes being with her.

When they finish eating, PAULINE kisses JAVIER’s cheek and they leave, holding hands.

25\. INT. ENTRANCE. POLICE FORCES. DAY.

JAVIER hesitates before going through the main doors but he takes a deep breath and does so. He lets PAULINE clock in his card, amusing at her figure trying to reach the machine on her tiptoes. The security staff on duty is not approving of the action but he allows it anyway since JAVIER still needs to scan his fingerprint.

They continue to the elevator and, once inside, he presses number 4 – ‘criminal investigation department’. PAULINE tries to decipher all the departments but it’s clear that she can’t read. The trip is quick.

On the chosen floor, JAVIER’s desk is the furthest away from the elevator’s door so he is doing the walk of shame. He was always the subject of gossip. RAYA is the first one to approach him.

 

RAYA

Did you lose your way here? Or did aliens abduct you? There must be some sort of signal on another planet.

JAVIER

Please. I know you’re angry.

RAYA

Fuck you. (He looks at PAULINE and coughs to clear his throat) Couldn’t you have replied to my message? Just one?

JAVIER

Who are you now? My mother?

RAYA

I’m not the one playing _uncles and fathers_.

 

JAVIER massages his forehead, his face frowning at the consequences of his rash decision back then. PAULINE pulls his sleeve, she herself intimidated by the grown-up, almost sterile environment of that place.

JAVIER is conflicted. He barely has his life sorted out and now a child – but could he just abandon her? And Yuzuru too? He finds himself ruffling her blond hair.

 

JAVIER

I’m not right. But I’m not wrong too. I need her.

RAYA

A substitute? She looks like that woman.

 

Javier is grateful that Brian shows up that moment or he might have punched RAYA for the insinuation. A substitute for whom? She is just a child.

 

BRIAN

Javier. In my office now. Alone. (He walks away)

RAYA

You better go. (He takes a deep sigh) Don’t worry. She will be safe here. The vipers only talk but they won’t do any harm.

 

JAVIER looks at PAULINE who nods in agreement and sits on his chair, feet dangling like before. She doesn’t say much but she is not scared of RAYA’s presence. His seat is also the closest to the window so she stares outside, counting the number of cars in the main avenue lining up at the junction behind the red traffic light.

 

JAVIER

Thank you.

 

RAYA punches him lightly on the clavicle.

26\. INT. BRIAN’S OFFICE. CID. POLICE FORCES. DAY.

The office is organized despite a few Manilla envelopes and files with mug shots and other visual evidence clipped on them, sprawled over BRIAN’s desk. The blinds on the glass pane of the door are closed no one can pry on his work. There are two mini cacti next to his telephone. JAVIER always thought that his office resembled a psychiatrist room more than anything. It even had an armchair on the corner, which he sat on now, legs apart and elbows on his knees.

 

BRIAN

Do I need to ask questions? This is not an interrogation.

 

BRIAN, 56, is a man worn out by time and yet his appearance refuses to show so. He has dark grey hair bordering black, most probably from dying the white ones that stubbornly found their way out on his receding hairline. His cheeks are full, distracting one from the noticeable wrinkles at the corner of his eyes. He looks serious and stern, but also affable and authentically concerned about his subordinate.

JAVIER fidgets on the leather covering, the packet in the pocket of his pants digging further into his groin.

 

JAVIER

(taking the packet out)

Mind if I smoke?

BRIAN

Go ahead. Your insurance won’t cover any burnt stain on my couch.

 

JAVIER nods as to say _I’ll be careful_ and picks up the ashtray underneath the seat. BRIAN didn’t smoke but he kept the round recipient for JAVIER. One can deduce how many times he had been summoned to his office.

JAVIER lights one white stick and inhales quickly. The smoke might not even have time to reach his lungs. It wasn’t the taste or the smell that he enjoyed the most, but the sensation that he could control how fast the cigarette would be burnt and consumed. It was one of the few things he knew he could dictate the pace with which it would be depleted and eventually destroyed, crumbling to ashes, at his very will. He observes the orange flame eat the paper and the mixture of tobacco and toxins.

 

JAVIER

I feel strange.

BRIAN

(pointing at the cigarette)

Not your usual batch?

JAVIER

They all taste the same. (He takes another drag) What doesn’t kill you-

BRIAN

It would take more than a drug to kill you.

 

JAVIER smirks and puts out the cigarette only half consumed. He reclines in the seat and BRIAN does the same.

 

JAVIER

One night and everything is different.

BRIAN

It’s not just one night Javi. It’s never just one night.

JAVIER

Raya told you about her.

BRIAN

(shaking his head) You’re an open book and I’ve read all the pages already.

JAVIER

Even the ones I haven’t written?

BRIAN

Especially those.

 

JAVIER moves to sit in front of BRIAN’s desk. Being closer to his mentor gave him a sense of safety. It also assured him that no one else could hear the rest of their conversation.

 

JAVIER

She’s dead.

BRIAN

Did you kill her?

JAVIER

(rising from his chair)

 _No!_ No- why? Why would I do it?

BRIAN

Calm down Javi. I don’t doubt you. Never did.

JAVIER

(his hands reaching for another cigarette but he forfeits the idea)

I killed no one. I don’t even know who she is!

BRIAN

Not even the name?

JAVIER

No name. No face. Nothing. It’s like those futuristic movies where you lie in an operating table and they flash ultraviolet lights until you have an epileptic shock and then a knife goes into your brain... (he winces at the thought)... red pill, blue pill, I took the blue and (he snaps his fingers) everything is gone!

 

JAVIER sits again, legs crossed, an unnecessary defensive posture. He feels suffocating.

 

BRIAN

(after a few minutes of silence)

Why don’t you take a week off?

JAVIER

(confused) What? I’m not crazy Brian.

 

A week off was synonym of suspension. It all depended on his superior’s report.

 

BRIAN

It will do you good. There is more to this, isn’t it? I can’t afford to have you wandering between dreams and reality.

JAVIER

This is not a dream! Nothing is-

 

Wrong? Delusional? Surreal? He almost bites his tongue. He can’t finish that sentence.

 

BRIAN

(massaging the bridge of his nose, finally showing he is as much affected by the whole situation)

And a child Javi? You suddenly show up with a kid.

JAVIER

She has nowhere to go.

 

He had nowhere to go too. Maybe that’s why he had taken a liking to Pauline.

 

BRIAN

Take the week Javi. For you. And for her.

 

JAVIER falls further into the seat. It wasn’t a suggestion. It was an order.

 

BRIAN (CONT’D)

You’re more than a son to me Javi.

 

And BRIAN the father he never had.

 

JAVIER

Only one week. (he stands up, ready to leave)

BRIAN

Your gun. On the desk. I can’t have you hurt yourself.

JAVIER

(hesitant) I’m not going to shoot myself.

BRIAN

It’s the protocol then.

 

JAVIER reluctantly retrieves the gun holstered at his left calf and puts it on top of the Manilla envelopes. His leg feels lighter without it. He feels lighter without it.

27\. INT. CRIMINAL INVESTIGATION DEPARTMENT. POLICE FORCES. DAY.

JAVIER leaves BRIAN’s office and the commotion outside is expected. Not an uproar but his colleagues are all around PAULINE, some charmed by her shyness and others returning to their own work stations after spying for some inside intelligence. He can hear some of them mentioning ‘an illegitimate daughter’ and ‘a precocious attempt at forceful parenthood’, if that meant anything at all.

Why did everyone had to talk about him? He doesn’t pay attention as he closes his eyes to briefly forget about all the noise, and he steps on the tail of a cat that had strolled between his feet. The poor pet yells and JAVIER literally jumps. He immediately checks whether he has done any serious damage and to give a good amount of patting and caressing as apology. It’s an Egyptian Mau, slim and elegant. JAVIER is taken aback by its golden eyes.

One of his colleagues comes promptly to their rescue. She is SONIA, 26, another of his close friends, her appearance one of handsomely beauty.

 

SONIA

Did she bite you Javi?

JAVIER

(perplexed) Bite? It’s a cat, not a dog.

SONIA

This one only uses teeth, not claws.

 

SONIA picks up her pet and it curls in her arms, the tail hanging limply over her arm.

 

JAVIER

I might have broken something. (he tries to check again but the cat just dives deeper into her chest)

SONIA

He’s much stronger than you think. He pretends to be hurt and there you go, enslaved forever.

 

JAVIER laughs at her comment. SONIA puts it back to the travel carrier and locks the metallic hatch.

 

SONIA

Please don’t tell BRIAN about this incident. (she joins her hands as if praying) He needs to go to the vet and you know how chaotic my schedule is. Please.

JAVIER

I’ll pretend I never saw anything.

 

JAVIER goes to PAULINE, exchanging a few words with RAYA, explaining the situation and promising to tell him everything soon. RAYA doesn’t press for more, clearly showing his knowledge about these arrangements. PAULINE is eager to leave and he too surprisingly.

As they walk to the elevator, JAVIER notices SONIA’s cat stretched in its box but intently staring at him with the golden eyes, accusing and threatening. The elevator doesn’t come. He opts for the stairs.

28\. MONTAGE. MOMENTS SCATTERED AMONG THE CITY. DAY.

Music cue: NOSTALGIA – YANNI

\- In a hospital ward, all the doctors, nurses, and miscellaneous staff recognize YUZURU and they announce his visit to the inpatients. They all seem fervently waiting for him to enter their own assigned rooms. When he chooses one of them, there is a sense of disappointment and despondency. YUZURU meets a young boy, bald, the skin too yellow and broken over the neck and exposed arms. The parents are crying but they thank YUZURU again and again. Even the young boy praises him for his kindness. YUZURU puts a hand to his forehead and mutters a few words, inaudible to all except to the young boy. He never opens his eyes again. YUZURU cries.

\- An alley in a quiet part of the city, behind restaurants and between residential buildings. An informal dumpster, never illuminated by the sun and home to flies and cockroaches. A favorite spot for shady businesses. A stray dog, exhausted from labor lies against a worn out mattress. Three newborn puppies are sucking the teats for milk. One of them is left alone, weak and still covered in amnion. YUZURU gently bring the puppy to its mother. It will survive.

\- Later at a coffee shop, YUZURU orders a simple latte – decaffeinated. He lets the silkiness of the milk slide down his throat as he licks the foam from his lips. The bitterness, the warmth, the adult, mature taste of JAVIER. He is walking on a street but he quickly runs to the nearest park. He hides in the shadows of a tall, thick tree in the quietest corner, impossible to be seen unless one wanted to be found. And he didn’t want to. He opens the fly of his pants and frees his manhood from his underwear, taking a sharp intake of air as the cool breeze hits the sensitive skin of his cock. He massages the tip gently, a few strokes until his hands are slick with pre-cum and he bites the collar of his shirt to avoid calling Javier’s name too loud. He brings the paper coffee cup to his erection and crunches the sides, still warm, around his member. He was violating the preferred decaffeinated of his Mr. Stranger, who was no stranger anymore. He comes, shooting his semen into the cup. Into Javier.

\- YUZURU arrives at an entertainment club, the exterior reflecting the decadent and luscious nature of the establishment. He looks at his clock and realizes it’s still too early. He throws the crushed coffee cup in the non-recyclable waste and enters the building by its rear door.

29\. INT. KITCHEN. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. EVENING.

JAVIER and PAULINE had spent the whole afternoon in the _Retiro_ park. It’s the first time he spends one entire day dedicated to someone else, chasing butterflies and birds, rowing boats and riding on bicycles (he riding and she commanding like a chevalier and he the horse). They are now in the kitchen, JAVIER flipping pancakes while PAULINE shamelessly steals raw batter occasionally.

 

JAVIER

(pointing at her plate)

Don’t you get tired of these?

PAULINE

(bringing her plate)

They’re my favorite. And Yuzu’s.

JAVIER

You know everything about Yuzuru.

PAULINE

(grinning) Not everything. But most things.

 

They sit at the table. PAULINE scoops a spoonful of orange blossom honey on her stash and a huge dollop of Chantilly cream. She eats heartily and impatiently. She helps to wash the dishes and the flour and eggs wreck at the counter. A yawn escapes her lips as she dries a bowl. JAVIER tells her to go take a shower and sleep afterwards.

He has had other women in his apartment but never a child and he finds himself unsure of what to do.

30\. INT. JAVIER’S BEDROOM. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. NIGHT.

He lends PAULINE his longest T-shirt and explains every single detail of his bathroom to her. PAULINE finds his clumsy actions funnier than any cartoon on the TV. While PAULINE takes a shower, he sits on his bed and calls his sister LAURA. The call is through at the second ring.

 

LAURA (V.O.)

Javi? You never call me this late.

JAVIER

Hey Laura, how do you take care of a kid?

LAURA (V.O.)

Excuse me?

JAVIER

Please don’t ask questions, but I have this little girl-

LAURA (V.O.)

Am I an auntie now? What will mamá say?

JAVIER

It’s not what you think. She’s a friend.

LAURA (V.O.)

A child?

JAVIER

Please Laura. You used to look after me.

LAURA (V.O.)

I still do.

JAVIER

(strained) _Yes_. She has no one to go to now. And my hands are tied.

LAURA (V.O.)

Untie them then. You knew about the job when you jumped into this.

 

He knew nothing. He still knows nothing, except PAULINE’s sugar addiction. LAURA scolds him over the phone and advises him to use the week off he has to observe, make mistakes and learn from them. This somehow reassures him.

 

LAURA (V.O.) (CONT’D)

Are you really taking care of a child?

JAVIER

(slightly annoyed) How many times do I have to repeat myself?

LAURA (V.O.)

You’ve changed.

JAVIER

I’m still your brother.

LAURA (V.O.)

That will never change.

 

They exchange a few more words about their parents, how he should visit them soon and a reminder to eat properly. He cuts the call.

PAULINE comes out of the bathroom, her hair still wet and dripping, and JAVIER instinctually grabs a towel and dries the blond strands as she sits on his lap. His T-shirt is a dress for her, covering her knees. She rolls out of his ruffling touch and jumps on his bed, up and down, the pillows almost falling to the floor.

 

JAVIER

You’ll ruin my springs.

PAULINE

(stopping) Can I sleep with you?

JAVIER

Only if you don’t snore.

 

PAULINE lies down, hands extended on the side, pretending to be a statue, and holds her breath. Javier laughs at her unconvincing imitation. He tries to tickle her, but she sees right through him and she draws her arms in front of her chest in a big ‘X’.

 

PAULINE

Only Yuzu can do this.

 

MONTAGE. PAULINE’S MEMORIES. THESE CHANGE AT THE RHYTHM OF A FLICKER OF A FLAME OF A CANDLE.

\- Pauline enters the church from before. It’s the first time she went there. She is running away from home. In the middle of the two row of benches, YUZURU sleeps peacefully on the red carpeted floor. Seen from above, he is at the center of the cross-shaped architectural design of the interior. She doesn’t dare to wake him up.

\- PAULINE runs away from home again and to avoid being caught, she hides in the confessional. To her surprise, YUZURU opens the small screen. He asks for her name, her favorite color of crayon, what she likes to play the most, and she is drawn to his laughter. She answers his questions just as she asks him many more.

\- PAULINE brings a book about angels, mostly pictures, and asks YUZURU to read it for her. She is trying to see which one resembles YUZURU the most.

\- PAULINE and YUZURU eat pancakes on the church’s altar. They hide under it, the white cloth camouflaging both their silhouettes. They try not to giggle as FATHER SHEM replenishes the wine and communion wafers in the tabernacle.

\- There is the chirping of a sparrow. A pained cry in the silent church. YUZURU holds the injured animal, unable to flap its broken wings. When he releases it, it flies around before reaching for its freedom outside.

\- PAULINE is going back to the church but she catches a glimpse of YUZURU and a woman dressed impeccably from head to toes. She pushes YUZURU against the side door, harsh and forceful, as she calls him _monster_ while he laughs unrestrainedly.

\- PAULINE asks YUZURU why he is a monster, that she doesn’t understand it. YUZURU tells her he will never be a monster for her.

BACK TO THE PRESENT

JAVIER is listening very attentively to what PAULINE has been telling him. They are both lain in bed, a light blanket up to her shoulders. She is nodding off and visibly trying to make an effort to stay awake.

 

JAVIER

Yuzuru will find you?

 

PAULINE has closed her eyes, her blond hair draped over the pillow.

 

PAULINE

(almost mumbling)

He always finds me. I’m his angel.

 

She falls asleep. JAVIER leaves the bed lamp on in a faint, warm yellow light.

31\. INT. KITCHEN. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. NIGHT

JAVIER fixes himself a glass of water. He adds a few ice cubes to it. He never enjoyed the lukewarm piquancy of tap water. The cubes are extremely cold, gelid, and he chokes on one of them, coughing desperately while cursing under the spasms for his own stupidity as he empties the contents of the glass in the sink. He almost throws up the contents of his own stomach as well. JAVIER calms down and recovers his breath. If he grips the glass any tighter, it will break.

 

YUZURU

Are you okay?

 

The sudden extra voice in the room startles him and he drops the glass on the floor. It shatters into pieces of different sizes. One shard flies over to YUZURU’s feet. How could have he stealthy entered his home without he noticing it?

An uncomfortable sense of being watched creeps to JAVIER’s nerves, which only accentuates his impotence.

 

JAVIER

(visibly controlling his breathing)

How did you get in?

 

YUZURU picks up the broken shard near his feet and puts it down on the table. Transparent glass that refracted a rainbow on the line of fracture. There is a small petal on his hair. Real or fake, JAVIER can’t tell. It’s gold.

 

YUZURU

You left the door open.

 

JAVIER is pretty sure he had locked it. Perhaps. Maybe. He is not certain anymore.

 

JAVIER

Pauline is sleeping. You came for her, I assume.

YUZURU

(tapping his fingers on the surface on the table)

Yes.

JAVIER

She told me. About you.

 

JAVIER bends down to pick the broken shards and YUZURU soon joins him. He smells of expensive perfume, delicately suave, and JAVIER moves a little closer, attracted by that scent. YUZURU’s ears are red and his eyelashes are impossibly long. JAVIER averts his gaze, feeling suddenly too self-aware and conscious of another male body next to his own. He quickly grabs all the remaining pieces and throws them into the dust pan.

 

YUZURU

I only have her.

 

They are both standing with their backs on the granite counter, at least a person’s distance between them.

 

JAVIER

Why can’t she stay with you?

YUZURU

Because... (he pauses for a second, pressing his lips shut)... it’s too dangerous.

JAVIER

Dangerous?

 

YUZURU only nods. He takes small steps around the space between them. He is clearly not going to reveal anymore what ‘danger’ entails.

 

YUZURU

Can I see her?

 

JAVIER guides YUZURU to his room. YUZURU does not enter and only peeks through the narrow gap of the open door.

Did he really want to let YUZURU enter his personal world?

YUZURU mutters a quick _thank you_.

 

JAVIER

Stay. Pauline would like to see you.

 

32\. INT. LIVING ROOM. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. NIGHT.

JAVIER finds fascinating the duality in YUZURU as he looks at the stranger he knew nothing of except for what PAULINE has told him. He had that most vulnerable eyes and his shoulders sagged when he had the opportunity to see his sleeping beauty, as if blocks of worry had finally been lifted from his shadow. Now sitting across him on his sofa, there is a new iron-clad filter around him that JAVIER finds even more alluring. He wants YUZURU to go away and to stay. To knock down that barrier and to help him build a sturdier one. He would be lying if he said he wasn’t fearful.

Maybe that’s why he was welcoming PAULINE in his life. Because wherever she was, YUZURU would be too.

 

YUZURU

Are we just going to look at each other until dawn?

JAVIER

I don’t know. I don’t know who you are. (beat) You tried to kill me.

 

YUZURU chuckles, confident, knowingly pretentious, neither confirming or refuting that last statement.

 

YUZURU

But you still want me here.

 

JAVIER hesitates, finding his laughter to be slightly irritating. Especially the way it pierced directly his core.

 

JAVIER

I want answers.

 

About the woman who had died. About his involvement in all this. About his dreams. About his life. About the golden eyes. About why he is here.

 

YUZURU

(looking at his own hands)

There are many ways to kill. And many ways to die. (he looks at Javier) You want me here.

JAVIER

Pauline wants you. You are the world to her.

 

YUZURU sits closer and grabs JAVIER’s wrist, firm but not tense. He massages the skin there, feeling the pulse in the radial artery, as if he was pressing directly into JAVIER’s heart.

 

YUZURU

You want me.

 

JAVIER tries to retreat his hand, the fear of being swallowed by darkness and falling into an abyss re-emerging again, but YUZURU won’t let him. The younger man knows well what his quickened pulse means.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

Didn’t you feel alive?

The moment of impact, the electricity on his brain, his lungs almost exploding from the blitz of oxygen, his heart leaping out of the ribcage from excitement. He remembers yes, that moment when his survival instincts took over his mind, freed him from the trepidation and brought him beyond death.

JAVIER touches YUZURU’s arm and the latter purrs like a leopard. A big, wild feline.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

I want you.

 

JAVIER kisses YUZURU, slow and unhurried. It’s just the contact of two mouths, in leisure motion and tentative.

It’s a very sweet kiss.

JAVIER doesn’t close his eyes but YUZURU has his shut, even when they part. YUZURU licks his lower lip and he smiles shyly, as if he too suddenly remembered something very important to him.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

It’s the same. It’s _you_.

 

This time, YUZURU is the one to initiate the kiss, needier and seeking JAVIER’s lips with charging urgency. JAVIER loses himself in it.


	5. Chapter V

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Of misadventures in the church and pancake counting, wet dreams and Lady Fox.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear all, this update came earlier because my frustration has reached new levels and I'll be completely immersed into my exams so real life is giving me the red light for writing in the next week and so. 
> 
> Note 1: This chapter is the one so far with the highest number of religious references. I do not intend to offend anyone and their beliefs. This is for the sake of a creative pursuit. There might be a triggering moment and I have highlighted it in the text. 
> 
> Note 2: This is a work of fiction, set in an alternative universe. This work does not reflect the people mentioned whatsoever.

33\. EXT. FOREST. NIGHT.

It’s the same forest JAVIER has seen previously in the other dreams, overseeing the city and eerily quiet. It’s becoming a recurrent dream and it is as if he is watching the reels of a movie unroll in front of his eyes.

There is a dead body close by – expected. It’s a woman. Her eyes are wide open, each orb almost falling out of its socket, a trail of white foam leaking from her mouth to the dirt and her neck violently strangulated. She is dressed to perfection, not a single injury visible in the rest of her body. It’s ELIZA.

For a second, JAVIER seems to recognize her, but we never known if this is what his eyes mean. He lowers himself and closes her eyelids, letting her rest in peace. JAVIER continues forward into the darkness, which does not scare him but leaves him uncomfortable with the sensation he’s being observed. He is. A voice from behind calls him.

 

GOLDEN EYES

Is it still not enough?

 

JAVIER turns back but the presence is gone. He looks forward and the pair of golden eyes are mere inches apart from his. The surrounding darkness has materialized further and it’s becoming a human silhouette, still undistinguishable though. JAVIER takes a step closer.

 

GOLDEN EYES

Stupid human. (sharp purr) But you’re not even that.

JAVIER

(somehow shocked) Not human?

 

The golden eyes are almost on top of him but JAVIER’s posture does not falter. A pair of hands, which he can’t see but he thinks it’s a pair of hands, runs all over him. It’s a presence that tenses and relaxes him at the same time. He leans further in, surrendering to the caresses. He lies down. No, he is being lain down by the golden eyes, gentle, inviting him to come home, trying to melt and join as one being only.

 

JAVIER

Yuzuru...

 

At the sound of that name, the golden eyes erupt into a fit of hysterical screams, so loud and the screeching so high, JAVIER thinks his eardrums will rip apart.

 

GOLDEN EYES

I’ll kill him! In front of your eyes so you’ll never forget! I’ll kill him!

 

The screams don’t stop and he just wants them to end. Everything around him dissolves like aquarelle in water.

34\. INT. JAVIER’S ROOM. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. MORNING. DAY 1 OF WEEK OFF.

JAVIER wakes up screaming, though not as loud. He sits immediately on his bed, his pajama top clinging to his body in a layer of sweat and he runs to the bathroom, throwing up nothing but air, saliva and bile. His throat is dry, burning from the regurgitated acid. His eyes are bloodshot, though not really red – the sight of a demon. He turns on the tap in the basin and plunges his head down, letting the calm water wash away his nausea.

JAVIER returns to his bed, sitting on the edge. He then realizes PAULINE is not sleeping next to him. A new wave of fear infiltrates his blood. He throws the blanket away, to the floor, naively thinking she might be hiding under it. PAULINE comes from the living room and at the sight of him sick, flushed and weak, she hugs him. With JAVIER sitting and she standing up, they are finally of the same height.

 

PAULINE

Did you have a nightmare?

 

JAVIER nods and she pulls him tighter. He lets himself be spoilt by her embrace. He should not transfer his own problems onto her tiny shoulders but in this moment, she seemed stronger than he ever was.

 

PAULINE (CONT’D)

If you close your eyes and count ten pancakes, the dream will go away.

 

JAVIER laughs but he does what she says. When he closes his eyes, the darkness still sends a shiver to the extremities of his limbs.

 

PAULINE (CONT’D)

One pancake with caramel.

 

Her voice soothes him and JAVIER tries her technique.

 

JAVIER

(coarse voice) Two pancakes with orange jam.

PAULINE

Three pancakes with green tea ice cream.

 

JAVIER doubts that will taste delicious. They continue counting until ten, the possible combinations becoming weirder and more absurd. He does feel better after and PAULINE releases him.

 

PAULINE (CONT’D)

We always count pancakes when I’m sad.

 

We. PAULINE and YUZURU. JAVIER wonders if he is a member of their secret pact. A friend? An ally? Someone they can trust?

 

JAVIER

Yuzuru was here last night.

 

A TRACE OF JAVIER’S MEMORY

It’s the kiss JAVIER and YUZURU shared last night. JAVIER was the first one to reach for his lips but YUZURU soon returns to claim his, even more passionate, pushing him further into the couch, drinking from his tongue, sucking the air out of his mouth, depriving him of all his senses so he could only focus on the kiss and nothing else.

JAVIER turns his face to the side, breaking the kiss as YUZURU’s lips brush his jawline. He tries to resume the contact but JAVIER holds him by the neck. He has both hands on his Adam’s apple. The protruding cartilage is so fragile he could crush him right now. He grips firmer, pressing down harder – he could kill him anytime.

YUZURU smirks and throws his head back, giving him better access. JAVIER constricts him with a bruising force, the thought of breaking him exciting him. He only relaxes his grip when YUZURU has his mouth open, trying to maximize the intake of air, almost suffocating. JAVIER kisses him, supplying him all with the air he wanted.

To kill and to save – _what a thrill_.

BACK TO PRESENT

 

PAULINE

I know. But I still want to see him.

 

JAVIER nods yes and tells her to go to the kitchen and think what she wants for breakfast. He quickly takes a shower, quenching his growing erection, and meets her there.

35\. INT. KITCHEN. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. MORNING.

PAULINE takes a sip of her hot chocolate as JAVIER fixes a lemon marmalade and peanut butter toast for her. He pours hot water on his instant coffee. Not his favorite but it would do. The drink scratches the insides of his sore throat and it barely settles on his upset stomach. He doesn’t bother to eat.

 

JAVIER

(pouring the coffee down the sink)

Where would you like to go?

PAULINE

(finishing her toast)

To the church. It will be fun.

JAVIER

Fun?

 

She grins widely as if knowing some secret JAVIER wasn’t aware of, which was probably the case. He gives her a napkin to wipe off her chocolate moustache.

36\. INT. NAVE. CHURCH. DAY.

It’s in the middle of a mass service. PAULINE and JAVIER are seated at the back in an empty bench. PAULINE stands on her tiptoes to try to get a glimpse of YUZURU but the people in front of her are too tall and block her view. And old lady on the side gives her a disapproving look but PAULINE ignores it.

The church is not full and yet there are quite a lot of people. Javier notices YUZURU next to FATHER SHEM, dressed in all white, a sharp contrast to his black hair. YUZURU notices him too and for a second, even with all the people and benches between them, he feels closer to YUZURU than ever. During the sermon, PAULINE can’t stop whispering to JAVIER.

 

PAULINE

This part is so boring.

JAVIER

Just wait a little longer.

PAULINE

Look, (she points at the same woman who was eyeing her) she’s knitting a scarf. Yuzu doesn’t like olive green.

JAVIER

It might be for herself.

PAULINE

They always make things for Yuzu.

 

PAULINE continues picking on random people in the service, saying that the man two rows in front of them has a head like a bowling ball, with the tiny holes and everything, how the girl dressed in orange in the choir had her song booklet on the contrary, how the other acolyte next to YUZURU was moving so much because he was almost pissing on his pants.

 

PAULINE (CONT’D)

Do you think Father Shem will fall when he finishes the speech?

 

JAVIER is trying hard to suppress his laughter as he imagines and visually searches for all the episodes PAULINE tells him. When FATHER SHEM returns to the altar, he kind of wishes to see him trip in the lectern. Pity he didn’t.

Somehow the service has become much more enjoyable with PAULINE’s company. At the communion time, she pulls JAVIER to go with her.

 

PAULINE (CONT’D)

Let’s see Yuzu.

JAVIER

Father Shem won’t let you take anything.

PAULINE

That’s why you have to go too. It’s just a train dance.

 

JAVIER really laughs and puts both his hands on her shoulders as she walks in front of him, animated, almost dancing. When it’s their turn PAULINE just steps to the side, exchanging a wink with YUZURU, while JAVIER takes the wafer in the mouth. The eyes YUZURU shoots at him are ones of jealousy. He doesn’t know why.

By the end of the ceremony, PAULINE and JAVIER remain in their place as everyone else leaves. JAVIER picks up a platinum card in the floor in front of him. It has a serial number and LOTUS written on it. No one comes back to claim it so he shoves it in his pocket.

 

PAULINE

C’mon. Now it’s the best time.

 

She pulls him again to follow her. She knows every corner of that church.

37\. INT. INNER CHAMBER. CHURCH. DAY.

They both enter the inner chamber on the back without even knocking. Yuzuru is finishing changing his white alb for his T-shirt and jeans. JAVIER catches a glimpse of his naked back and torso, pale, slender, ribs protruding and pink nipples. He swallows hard. PAULINE runs to YUZURU, hugging him by the hip. He stumbles backwards, his arms caught in his shirt. He soon returns the hug and even twirls her in the air.

 

YUZURU

I miss you princess.

PAULINE

I miss you too Yuzu. So much. Why didn’t you talk to me last night?

YUZURU

You were sleeping already.

PAULINE

I won’t sleep tonight.

YUZURU

Don’t give trouble to Javier.

PAULINE

He is my knight too now. He can make pancakes.

YUZURU

With vanilla?

PAULINE

(nodding) And ice-cream (she raises three fingers) on each one.

YUZURU

Your teeth will fall out.

PAULINE

(punching his thigh)

No, they won’t! (she flashes her teeth)

 

PAULINE is truly spoilt when with YUZURU. JAVIER delights at the sight of them together. He wishes to be part of it.

 

PAULINE (CONT’D)

Javi had a bad dream today. I saved him. Are you proud of me?

 

YUZURU looks at JAVIER for a second and bites his lower lip, as if he knew exactly what he had dreamt.

 

YUZURU

Then you will have to be always there for him. So his bad dream won’t come back.

 

PAULINE nods her head vigorously. She runs to JAVIER, who had stood at the door, and pulls him in. She lines in front of him, just like before when they were waiting in the conga line.

 

PAULINE

I want to try one.

 

Yuzuru ruffles her hair, to which she protests, and he grabs a small jar from a nearby cabinet. It’s full of communion wafers and he picks the largest one and raises it in front of her.

 

YUZURU

Take this as a symbol of my flesh and blood, so we may never be apart.

PAULINE

(extending her hands)

Amen.

 

She looks at the extremely light, round-shaped, almost carved out of a sheet of paper cracker, as if examining something alien, seen for the first time. She bites it and lets a small piece dissolve on her tongue. Her face says it all. It’s very bland.

JAVIER is surprised when YUZURU raises one for him too, though of smaller size.

 

YUZURU

Take this as symbol of my _soul_ , so we may never be apart.

 

JAVIER has no time to extend his hands when the wafer is already at his lips. He opens his mouth, slowly, and darts his tongue out to take the foreign object in. YUZURU doesn’t let go of it. His fingers and JAVIER’s tongue meet, the younger man’s pupils slightly dilated, two solid black marbles. Javier notices the bruise, the reddish, purple area on his neck, below his Adam’s apple. It’s the mark he had left yesterday.

It makes him guilty, proud, and aroused.

 

PAULINE

(finishing her wafer)

Can I stay with you today Yuzu?

 

JAVIER remembers the ‘danger’ YUZURU had told, not knowing now whether to allow this or to stop her. Stop her? With that authority?

 

YUZURU

You should ask Javi.

 

PAULINE turns to JAVIER, looking hopeful for a positive answer. What JAVIER wants is for the three of them to stay together. He doesn’t say that though.

 

YUZURU

(guessing what JAVIER is thinking)

It’s fine. It will be fine.

 

38\. INT. LIVING ROOM. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. AFTERNOON.

JAVIER is back home, alone. He lied to both PAULINE and YUZURU about a meeting with LAURA, he suddenly not comfortable with being in the church anymore and feeling as if he was disturbing and splitting a secret bond between the two of them – two strangers who had barged into his life.

He drops his house keys at the coffee table and when he sits, a hard object presses into his groin. He shifts around until he takes out the card he had found earlier. LOTUS. A very famous club, well-known for its opulence and glamour. It is one of the most coveted places at the moment. It was random luck that he had got the card. Why not enjoy it? It was also a way to make up to Raya. He calls him immediately.

 

RAYA (V.O.)

Hey Javi, enjoying the parenting experience?

JAVIER

Wouldn’t trade it for anything.

RAYA (V.O.)

I still can’t believe you got one week off. You lazy ass. _Cabrón_.

JAVIER

That’s why I’m calling. Make me less of a _cabrón_. (he flips the card between his fingers) Are you free tonight?

RAYA (V.O.)

Depends on the program. You know, free entertainment.

JAVIER

What if I say Lotus?

RAYA (V.O.)

(sarcastic laughter) Very funny. I almost believed in you.

JAVIER

I’m not joking.

RAYA (V.O.)

(dumbfounded) Are you serious? I swear I’ll pluck you like a chicken if you’re lying.

JAVIER

Do you want to go or not?

RAYA (V.O.)

How come you always have the best?

JAVIER

Life’s unfair.

RAYA (V.O.)

 _Vete a freír espárragos_. (Go fuck yourself)

 

JAVIER laughs. He can’t imagine what he would become without RAYA’s friendship. It is said that people who share the same name are connected by fate. JAVIER doesn’t believe in folk tales. Perhaps only this time. They agree a time to meet and he cuts the call. He turns on the TV, hoping it would make time sprint.

The different channels have boring programs that he ends up skipping:

\- An afternoon talk show with a new band currently rising to stardom with their hip-hop music.

\- A rerun of _Gone With The Wind_ , dubbed in Spanish.

\- A cooking segment in an eat organic and healthy choices show.

\- The afternoon news with emphasis of the murder of a young girl followed by the suicide of her father.

JAVIER leaves the TV on a music channel that he doesn’t pay attention to. He had not slept enough last night because of the nightmare, so he’s dozing off now. His eyelids are heavy. He closes his eyes. It will only be for a few minutes.

 

**JAVIER’S DREAM – TRANSPORTED TO ANOTHER REALM**

 

We are transported back to the church, now empty but the organ is playing. Not a song but dramatic notes. JAVIER seems confused as to why he is there. He sees YUZURU far in the sanctuary and he goes to meet him. The closer he gets, the clear the picture becomes.

He sees the same naked angel with the large python encircling his body. JAVIER stops halfway, in the middle of rows of benches. YUZURU lays himself in the altar – a lamb for sacrifice.

The enormous snake roams through his forehead, his dark hair, his earlobes, the bruised patch of skin in his neck. It continues down his collarbones, his armpits, his perky virgin nipples. Its long teeth graze through the tendons of his thin arms, his wrists, joining them as if tying into submission, the muscles of his waist and navel, leaving thin trails of blood. YUZURU gasps for air, his lips curved into a lustful smile, as he turns his head to face JAVIER.

JAVIER hears a voice. It’s his but not his at the same time.

 

JAVIER’S VOICE

Go. Move Javier. Don’t you want him?

 

He does. He doesn’t. Yes, he does. No, he doesn’t. Not like that.

 

JAVIER’S VOICE

Like what? Defenseless? Crying? Begging? Waiting to be impaled?

JAVIER

Stop.

YUZURU

(in a high tone)

_Javier._

 

JAVIER is trembling all over. He takes small steps, closer, even when he’s shaking his head, telling himself no, that it is all a dream.

 

JAVIER’S VOICE

That’s it. Good boy. He is waiting for you. Only you.

 

Another low note on the organ and another cry from YUZURU. The python slides through his inner thighs, its tongue reaching and retracting along the length of his manhood, wrapping on the shaft. Its tail travels down the coccyx, the perineum and teases the tight ring of muscles of his entrance, slightly in but immediately now, preparing him for JAVIER.

JAVIER is already next to YUZURU, his own voice of reason gone. The python registers his presence and stops caressing YUZURU. It encircles JAVIER now, its scales scratching the nape of his neck and its enormous body constricting his chest. It looks directly at JAVIER, the golden eyes intoxicating. It releases him and goes away.

JAVIER moves to the altar, between YUZURU’s legs and he observes the sacrifice the heavens gave him. A distressed angel, hair wet with sweat plastered on his temples, globules of tears in his eyelashes, chest heaving up and down, precum leaking and running down his hips to the marble surface of the altar. JAVIER touches his knees, opening him further apart and YUZURU moans his name. He is so sensitive already he doesn’t dare to kiss him, afraid he will break apart.

 

JAVIER’S VOICE

Break him. Break him more. You’ve been waiting for this.

 

JAVIER lowers his pants, just enough for his hardened cock to be freed from inhibitions and he penetrates him without waiting anymore. YUZURU cries, the sound ripped from the depths of his throat and echoing in the church. JAVIER keeps him steady by the hips, pounding again and again into that warmth, easy, already slick, slippery and prepared. YUZURU’s pants resonates in his ears, the pleasure lacing in each quenching clasp around JAVIER’s erection, each _more_ every time he thrust inside, deeper until he can’t come out again. YUZURU is all the prayer he needs. His rosary burns on his heart.

 

**BACK TO REALITY**

 

JAVIER wakes with a thrusting movement upwards to the air. He is sweating all over and tries to recover his breath, as if he had just finished a marathon. He opens the flier of his pants and touches the front of his briefs.

 

JAVIER

Fuck.

 

They are damp, wet, his semen coating his fingers. Another brush through his manhood and he whimpers from overstimulation. And frustration. He runs to the bathroom, throwing himself under the cold shower, cleansing the last remain of his own release.

He pours himself a shot of whiskey when he finishes his ritual of purification, and he drinks it in one go, the alcohol sliding down easily his esophagus to his stomach – just like how easily he slid inside YUZURU.

He sits on the couch again, his fingers instinctively reaching for a cigarette and the lighter. He takes a long drag as his hands still tremble from his orgasm. The cigarette tastes horrible and he puts it out promptly. He leans back, looking at the ceiling.

_Why did it have to end?_

39\. INT. BURGUNDY PEUGEOT 206. EVENING.

LOTUS is a prestigious entertainment club, coveted by most and a favorite spot when one wanted to impress a date. Both JAVIER and RAYA are dressed in suits, though without a tie. This is RAYA’s car. He is driving, in hopes of bringing a woman home. JAVIER is trying his best to ignore the incident of this afternoon, and yet, he is not particularly talkative. Maybe RAYA won’t notice it.

 

RAYA

How long haven’t we gone to a ‘hunt’?

JAVIER

(chuckling) A hunt? They just come to me.

RAYA

That’s sick. (JAVIER punches his leg) But you sure are honoring our high school wishes.

JAVIER

You still remember them?

RAYA

What? Graduate without cheating, find true love in a different bed every week, purge the evil from the world? I only failed one so far.

JAVIER

Two. Profe García caught you with a white paper.

RAYA

It was your idea. And we both had to repeat his long philosophy exam the week after.

JAVIER

Because I begged him.

RAYA

Because your mother begged him.

JAVIER

Yours too.

RAYA

Mine hit me with a slipper that day.

JAVIER

And I a mop.

 

They both laugh at their idiotic past, common for many of their age.

 

RAYA

Do you remember Valentina?

JAVIER

(keeps laughing) Please don’t. Are you still holding a grudge against me?

RAYA

Nah. But she was my girlfriend.

JAVIER

You almost threw me out of the window of our classroom.

RAYA

We were so stupid.

JAVIER

You still are.

RAYA

You should be careful because it’s contagious.

 

JAVIER would have never thought that reliving the past was so nostalgic. He touches the rosary on his chest. It’s still burning. One longs for the past, but there is no YUZURU there.

 

RAYA (CONT’D)

Introduce me to Pauline one day. She seems adorable.

JAVIER

She is. (he smiles heartily)

RAYA

But kids can be such a headache.

JAVIER

Pauline is special.

 

40\. EXT. LOTUS CLUB ENTRANCE. EVENING.

Once they arrive, JAVIER shows the card he has obtained, hopefully not being a fake one. The security staff, the typical men in black, scans the card and the change of attitude is immediate. It must be his lucky day because he is not asked to have his ID checked. He inclusive offers a valet parking service, which they gladly accept.

 

SECURITY

Enjoy your evening, Mr. Shem.

 

It was a VIP card. It really must be his lucky day.

 

JAVIER

You heard him. Enjoy and don’t ask anything.

 

RAYA air zips his lips close and they both enter through the darkness.

41\. INT. LOUNGE. LOTUS CLUB. EVENING.

It is a quiet club, dimly lit in tones of red and decorated with loosened scrolls of velvet, drawn in exquisite floral patterns. A small band, piano and cello, and the lead singer grant a live rendition of Norah Jone’s SUNRISE. One of the attendants guide JAVIER and RAYA to the table closest to the stage and she opens a bottle of champagne, brut, from 1991, courtesy of the house.

 

ATTENDANT/HOSTESS

Please enjoy this petty selection. It tastes even better from the lips.

 

She winks at both of them before going away. Raya is taken by her beauty but JAVIER is almost laughing.

 

RAYA

Did she assume we are-

 

JAVIER only nods and really laughs. He drinks a sip from the long flute. Aromatic and bold. He takes another sip and notices the same couple he had seen in the subway. They share a brief kiss before the lounge goes silent and the lighting is reduced to a minimum, except for the stage. The shiver of anticipation is palpable.

LADY FOX appears and the audience erupts into cheers. She has long silver hair that almost touches the floor, her dress a hybrid between a robe and a kimono, crimson with dragonflies, as if they were drowning in a pool of blood. It matches her lips, red and plump like smeared ripe cherries. She wears a mask, covering half her face, tassel on the side, point ears and nose – a fox.

She dances barefoot in silence, light, levitating, each step playing music on its own. She is alone but she fills the space with her movements, precise, sharp, then fluid, melting into the monotones of the piano. She sways across the stage only belonging to her, her dance one of sensuality and freedom.

Her eyes never leave JAVIER’s the whole performance. Neither JAVIER’s leave hers.

When the music stops, no one applauds but a woman in the back yells a number. Soon others join, raising their offer, like in an auction. The sums are immense and JAVIER doubts if the salary of his entire life could cover that.

Although JAVIER and RAYA only observe and stay quiet, LADY FOX approaches their table. Everyone goes silent and they have become the center of attention. LADY FOX kneels in front of RAYA and kisses him on the lips, all the time looking at JAVIER.

It’s not the sweet kiss he had with YUZURU. It’s a sterile one, even when her tongue invades RAYA’s mouth, who willingly opens to her, clearly enjoying. JAVIER suddenly feels very uncomfortable and shifts in his seat. Her eyes are dark like YUZURU’s, with a hint of gold, piercing his core. She retreats from the kiss, licking the trail of saliva from RAYA’s lips.

JAVIER feels the urge to escape and stands up. LADY FOX pushes him back down, her foot on his crotch, revealing the black lace stockings attached to a garter belt. She leans forwards, whispering so only he can hear.

 

LADY FOX

Don’t go.

 

Her voice is extremely familiar, the high but still velvety timbre, like a leopard’s purr. She does back to the stage and this time, two other dancers join her. The crowd cheers again, even louder than before.

LADY FOX holds the female dancer, her hand running from the dancer’s ankle, up to her knee, between her thighs, and it settles between her breasts. The male dancer brings her a saber. LADY FOX looks at JAVIER, smirking, daring him to look away. He doesn’t.

She pierces the female dancer through her heart. JAVIER feels as if the blade had cut into him instead. It excites and sickens him at the same time. LADY FOX grabs the blade, her hands bleeding and as she murmurs a few words to herself, she pulls out the saber. There is no injury on the female dancer, as if nothing had happened.

The crowd breaks into hysterical cries of joy, pleasure and same even chant her name. JAVIER wonders if it’s another angel.

It can’t be YUZURU.

 

RAYA

What was that? Is she even human?

 

JAVIER is back from his trance. The discomfort has not subsided. Only increased.

 

RAYA (CONT’D)

But damn, that kiss. Do you think she’s interested in me?

JAVIER

(low tone) Maybe.

RAYA

Are you okay? You look pale.

JAVIER

(hesitating) Yes. It’s nothing. I want... I need to go home.

RAYA

What? The show just started.

JAVIER

(he feels suffocating)

Sorry.

RAYA

It’s Pauline right? You suddenly remembered you have a kid now.

JAVIER

(lying) Yes. I need to check on her.

RAYA

A man of responsibilities. You’re finally growing up. Do you want me to drive you home?

JAVIER

No. Stay. Enjoy the night. (he points with his head to a woman leaning on the bar, looking intently at them) I’ll take a taxi.

 

And JAVIER walks away, wishing he had not come at all.

42\. EXT. STREET. NEARING MIDNIGHT.

JAVIER doesn’t take a taxi. He walks instead, following the street to wherever it led him. A young boy, probably not even 18, approaches him, asking whether he wants to have some crystal. He refuses. Another woman walks beside him, asking if he is looking for some fun. JAVIER politely tells her to disappear and to choose another street for her business. He does not know where is going, watching cars pass by and guided by the stars in the sky and the neon signs of bars and restaurants. He ends up walking to the church where he had been in the morning. He doesn’t know why he is there but he tries the side entrance and it’s open.

43\. INT. NAVE. CHURCH. IMMEDIATELY AFTER.

JAVIER sits on the nearest bench. He prepares to light a cigarette but FATHER SHEM stops him.

 

FATHER SHEM

I trust you to respect the house of the Lord.

 

JAVIER returns the white stick to the packet. He wanted to be alone and now he is not. He prepares to leave.

 

FATHER SHEM

Do not fall for that boy’s charm.

JAVIER

(halting his steps)

Yuzuru knows what he really wants.

FATHER SHEM

He does. You don’t. You are just lost. Do you think you can save him?

 

Save him? From what? The evil of the world, if there was any? From himself and his twisted mind who wanted him sprawled on the altar begging to be entered?

 

JAVIER

Isn’t he an angel?

PAULINE

Javi!

 

PAULINE runs to him from behind and hugs him. His face softens immediately and he twirls her in the air, just like how YUZURU had done before. PAULINE doesn’t look tired at all despite the late hours. YUZURU walks to him, standing a few inches away.

 

YUZURU

Father Shem. Javier is innocent.

FATHER SHEM

He will not do it. He will falter.

YUZURU

You don’t understand.

FATHER SHEM

My beautiful boy, (he extends both his hands as before waiting for YUZURU’s kiss) don’t be foolish.

 

YUZURU stays where he is. He refuses to take those hands. For the first time, he looks visibly distressed.

 

PAULINE

(unaware of what is being discussed)

Javi, let’s go home. The three of us.

 

JAVIER kisses her on top of the head, a kiss on her blond hair. He agrees. It was their home now.

 

JAVIER

Yes, let’s go home. The three of us.

 

YUZURU does not say a word but he smiles. He turns his back to Father Shem and they leave.

44\. EXT. OUTSIDE OF THE CHURCH. MIDNIGHT.

PAULINE jumps down the steps, the espadrilles echoing with each impact on the rock pavement.

 

YUZURU

Thank you.

 

JAVIER shakes his head, both hands on the pocket of his pants. Both of them watch PAULINE twirling, her dress spreading around her. She runs to them, seeing that they do not move from where they are.

 

PAULINE

Home. I want to go home.

JAVIER

Yes, my princess.

 

JAVIER holds her hand, finding nothing wrong between them. In them. He extends his other hand to YUZURU. YUZURU seems surprised and reluctant to hold his, but he concedes. When JAVIER grips firmer, YUZURU winces in pain. It’s the first time we see YUZURU reacting to pain. JAVIER feels a very familiar burn in their touch. He looks at both their palms. There is a cut across YUZURU’s hand. Both their hands are stained in blood.

 

JAVIER

_Lady Fox._


	6. Chapter VI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Of silence and secrets, big cats and mind reading, foxes and flying.

45\. EXT. OUTSIDE JAVIER’S APARTMENT COMPLEX. AFTER MIDNIGHT. DAY 2 OF WEEK OFF.

On their way back to JAVIER’s apartment, PAULINE asks YUZURU to carry her for she is tired. JAVIER volunteers instead and piggybacks her. She soon falls asleep, her face pressed on his shoulder. She is not heavy but her breathing is erratic and JAVIER grips her legs tighter so she won’t slip and fall.

PAULINE has a ladybug shaped side bag and it hits JAVIER’s thigh every step he takes. YUZURU has a handkerchief tied around his palm to stop the bleeding. Both he and JAVIER had made sure PAULINE did not notice the cut.

There is a heavy curtain of pregnant silence between them. Both men do not want to be the first one to speak, as if the serenity of the moment would be broken by their words.

46\. INT. JAVIER’S BEDROOM. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. NIGHT.

JAVIER puts PAULINE to bed, a blanket covering her body until the neck. She is sleeping soundly. JAVIER sits on the edge of the mattress, his hand parting away strands of her blond hair that had fallen over her eyes. She is at her most defenseless state in her sleep and JAVIER feels the urge to protect that innocence so she won’t disappear from his life. Because if she disappears, YUZURU will too. He kisses her forehead and leaves his rosary next to her pillow. It should safeguard her from nightmares. If not, they could always count pancakes.

47\. INT. KITCHEN. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. NIGHT.

When JAVIER goes to the kitchen, YUZURU is staring at nothing, looking at an existential emptiness surrounding him. He looks like a lost boy, a dog without owner, a ship without mast and its sail, an angel thrown out of heaven. It’s the first time YUZURU truly looks human, fragile and vulnerable. Unlike with PAULINE, JAVIER is delighted at that sight, at the thought that YUZURU could crumble like a tower without foundations. He licks his lips just imagining him on his knees, on the floor, over the table, over the counter, pieces of him scattered everywhere.

JAVIER approaches him and puts a hand on his shoulder. YUZURU is startled but he doesn’t shy away from the touch. He doesn’t lean on it too though.

 

YUZURU

Father Shem, he will-

JAVIER

(interrupting) You should check that cut.

 

JAVIER grabs the wrist of YUZURU’s injured hand. YUZURU looks reluctant to let him continue and tries to pull away. JAVIER’s grip is not strong but firm. He takes away the silk handkerchief, some of the fibers soaked in red and he throws it on the table. The cut is not too deep, also not shallow, but it has stopped bleeding. It is a precise cut, no side indentations, done by a very sharp blade. YUZURU’s hand looks like a drop of crimson gouache spread on a clean canvas.

 

JAVIER (CONT’D)

It will get infected if you don’t tend it.

YUZURU

Take care of it then. (he offers his hand) Take care of me.

 

JAVIER pulls his injured hand under the cold jet of water in the sink. It washes away the dry conglomerates of blood, a cascade of red going down the gasket. YUZURU hisses at the pain and he bites his lower lip, a mixture of agony and pleasure invading him as the water attacks his exposed muscle and nerves. JAVIER notices the paradox of emotions in him.

 

YUZURU

(very unconvincingly) Please stop.

 

JAVIER doesn’t. He presses on the cut with his fingers, bruising further the fragile hand. He is enticed by the control he’s exerting on YUZURU’s body and by the willingness he’s suggesting. When he finally turns off the faucet, YUZURU’s lips are slightly swollen but his eyes are submerged in life, a glitter of gold in them. JAVIER kisses the wound, hoping for a miracle too.

He tortures but he soothes too.

The cut does not heal though.

 

JAVIER

Why don’t you heal yourself?

YUZURU

Pain makes me alive.

 

JAVIER swallows hard, not expecting that answer. It excites him though.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

(smirking) Do you want to hurt me?

 

JAVIER releases his hand, the truth in that question too frightening for him to acknowledge.

 

JAVIER

Will you let anyone hurt you?

 

YUZURU sits on the dining table, shaking his head. He kisses the palm of his own hand. The cut does not heal.

 

YUZURU

Can you hurt me Javi?

JAVIER

Is that what you want?

YUZURU

It’s what you will do.

 

JAVIER is again close to YUZURU, their bodies almost touching. YUZURU opens his legs to better accommodate JAVIER who is both aroused and trying to suppress his elation of the imminent danger. The danger of hurting YUZURU and to love it so much he will not want to stop.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

You will hurt me.

 

JAVIER kisses him, holding him by the neck as before, the purple bruised patch of skin still there. It is sweetly addicting, like no other pair of lips he has touched before. It is as if in his whole life he was waiting for this power.

 

YUZURU

(amidst kisses and mingling of their breath)

And I will want you to hurt me more.

JAVIER

(breathless) _Yes._

YUZURU

More. More. _More_.

 

Javier is lost in the chant of their desire. Whereas he had sex as a physiological need, it is the first time he desires someone beyond any rational explanation. His instincts commands him like a string marionette, unbuttoning YUZURU’s shirt, diving for direct physical contact with the angel that only belonged to him.

 

YUZURU

(panting) Hurt me.

JAVIER’S VOICE

Hurt him.

YUZURU

Hurt me more.

JAVIER’S VOICE

So you can kill him.

 

JAVIER opens his eyes and he steps back at the intensity of the moment. This was wrong. No, he doesn’t want this. He notices YUZURU’s eyes have turned gold, possessed. He can see scars on his chest, delicate cuts in serpentine patterns, like the ones made by the python at the altar. From the dream.

Is this a dream too? Was that really a dream? Was his whole life a dream?

When he looks at YUZURU again, his eyes are black obsidian shards again, and the same ravished, fragile boy he lusted for. JAVIER feels sick, sick of desire, of his uncontrollable will to break him, of his sanity betraying him.

 

JAVIER

Who are you Yuzuru?

YUZURU

(standing up)

Who do you want to know? Who do you want me to be?

 

JAVIER is bound to the same spot as YUZURU walks behind him, licking his earlobe, hands all over his torso.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

Who is Yuzuru? The angel? The murdered? The monster? Lady Fox?

 

YUZURU’s hands drop to JAVIER’s navel and they brush past his crotch, feeling the hardened erection through the pants. His body his shivering. So is Yuzuru’s.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

(his voice is honestly breaking)

I want to be _your_ Yuzuru.

 

JAVIER is taken by those words, the panic of not being able to pin YUZURU down and fuck him to oblivion rising again. He steps away, both hands gripping on the chair in front of him securing him in one piece.

 

JAVIER

Pauline is sleeping.

 

YUZURU presses JAVIER against the chair, straddling him. He kisses him again and again, his tongue invading his mouth, violating the palate, the sides, under his tongue, until saliva spills. He licks the wet trail, just as he had done to RAYA in Lotus and JAVIER succumbs to his jealousy and desire once more.

 

YUZURU

She won’t wake up.

 

He retrieves the blood-stained handkerchief and ties it around JAVIER’s eyes, blindfolding him. The smell of blood is still fresh, metallic and uncannily exhilarating. He can’t see anything and that only makes his other senses sharper.

 

JAVIER

Wait, Yuzu-

YUZURU

(putting a finger on his lips)

Shh. You’ll wake up Pauline.

 

JAVIER keeps quiet, his body static and fixed in that position, losing coordination with his eyes closed, his mind in a foggy darkness. A darkness in which he is not sleeping. YUZURU doesn’t move either. He watches JAVIER draw long inhalations, the air travelling down his throat to his lungs and going up again, expelled in expectant but uptight puffs.

He moves closer, still not touching with his hands and yet his lips are so close to JAVIER’s. For a while, there is only silence and they share the same air, the oxygen from his body being sucked directly by JAVIER’s parted lips and he drinking of the one sitting under him.

JAVIER can smell again the strong and expensive perfume. And underneath it, vanilla. He tilts forward, welcoming more of that stirring aroma. He darts his tongue out and he licks Yuzuru’s chin, up his jawline and cheek.

YUZURU distances himself again as if testing JAVIER, looking for the right moment to snap his sane judgment. He runs a hand through the hazelnut locks, caressing the scalp, down the back of his head, the nape, the collarbones.

JAVIER is visibly suppressing a moan and he swears he can imagine the smirk in YUZURU’s face.

 

YUZURU

(whispering) I can hear you Javi. So loud. So _hard_. I could come right now.

 

JAVIER lets a groan escape his mouth, unable to contain anymore. YUZURU puts a hand on the lips, muffling any possible sound, JAVIER’s warm breath exciting him the same way.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

I finally found you Javi. (he rubs their clothed loins together) You’re so much better than I’ve dreamed.

 

JAVIER moans against the hand, the soft hand tarnished with a cut that he would heal if he could. Which he can’t, so he licks it. He has surrendered to YUZURU’s ministrations and holy words. He is fully clothed, only his flier open, but he feels more naked than ever.

When YUZURU guides him in, sitting on him, without preparation and warning, they both gasp for the primal pain of carnality, of flesh on flesh. Yuzuru lets go of the hand on JAVIER’s mouth and his whole body tenses around JAVIER’s cock, deep buried in him.

It hurts. JAVIER is hurting YUZURU. It feels so good. He takes off the blindfold. Tears are streaming down YUZURU’s face – an angel with clipped wings, forever punished.

So beautiful.

YUZURU tries to move, to lift himself. JAVIER holds him by the hips, the nails digging into his bones, seizing him in that position, filling him up to the core, inch by inch.

 

YUZURU

(gasping for air)

Javi-

JAVIER

Be obedient Yuzu. You’ll wake up Pauline.

 

YUZURU nods yes. Just there, both their bodies are joined, their sensitive balance almost broken. It was better than any woman, any man, anyone JAVIER has been with before.

Who was YUZURU to have this power over him?

They both reach their climax even without much more stimulation, the contact of their erections enough to bring them to the edge. They are both in another realm, YUZURU collapsing on top of him, more mentally than physically exhausted, his eyes glimmering in gold, drown in tears.

If there was danger, JAVIER knew not what. He is also the one to recover first.

 

JAVIER

Yuzuru.

 

There is no response. His body is limp.

 

JAVIER (CONT’D)

Yuzuru.

YUZURU

(whispering) Why? (beat) Why didn’t you-

 

JAVIER removes himself from YUZURU, earning him a pained whelp, and he takes the younger man into his arms, carrying him to his room. He doesn’t want to talk. He is actually afraid of what they might say while still basking in the afterglow.

48\. INT. BATHROOM. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. NIGHT.

JAVIER sheds his clothes, his pants and shirt smeared with both his and YUZURU’s semen. He then cleans YUZURU, warm water and chamomile lemon soap. YUZURU is still fazed, his slender body twitching from the orgasm. He notices though the satisfied look in JAVIER’s face when he sees his own release leak out of his swollen sphincter.

 

YUZURU

(weakly) Why didn’t you kill me?

 

JAVIER wants to take his own semen and paint YUZURU’s lips with it like lipstick and have him suck his fingers so he would not spurt stupid assumptions.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

They all wanted to kill me.

 

They? His past lovers? The people who had fucked him? Those who had called him a monster?

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

You can grant their wish.

 

JAVIER bandages the wound in YUZURU’s hand. His clothes might be too large for his slim figure but there is no other option now. His scent was on them. This thought of possessing him even now after their bodies had been detached after their climaxes was threatening to wake his arousal again.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

You will one day. (beat) And I’ll finally be free.

JAVIER

Shut up.

 

He picks up YUZURU again, who is smiling pitifully at him.

49\. INT. JAVIER’S ROOM. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. NIGHT.

JAVIER puts YUZURU to bed next to PAULINE, who has her back to them, like he did with her too. He parts his hair of shades of the night. YUZURU breathes peacefully, on the verge of falling asleep. He kisses him, soft at first, but when YUZURU responds to it, he presses him further into the pillow and mattress. It’s harsh and it robs him of air.

JAVIER doesn’t say a word when they part but he hopes the message was clear – he won’t grant him any wish.

When JAVIER leaves the room, PAULINE turns to YUZURU and snuggles closer to him. She is coiled in a fetal position, knees to her chest while her fingers are clutching his shirt. She is crying.

What JAVIER and YUZURU don’t know is that she has witnesses their make out session.

50\. INT. KITCHEN. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. NIGHT.

JAVIER can’t fall asleep. The sex was good, too good he thought he would stayed forever and ever embedded in YUZURU. Even the angle of his open legs was perfect to accommodate him from the head until his ass slapped his balls. He shivers thinking of it. The kitchen still smells of their bodies mingling, of their sweat, of vanilla. JAVIER leans on the counter, lighting a cigarette. He takes a single puff and then he observes the orange fire consume the stick, the white wrapping paper and then the brown dried and crushed tobacco leaves. They all turn to ashes, slowly falling to the sink like snowflakes over a lake. There is a single drop of blood in the stainless-steel basin. He puts out the cigarette on it.

51\. EXT. FOREST. NIGHT

It’s the dream we are already used to. In the same line, JAVIER is also aware of how it will unroll. He has control this time, he tells himself. This is a dream and he can control it. He will not see the same corpse because that woman has already departed. And he is right. Instead, this time, it’s a skeleton, no traces of muscles and skin on it. It’s a small skeleton, too small to be of an adult. Mouth agape, empty eye sockets, a series of broken ribs and a cracked skull. It is a dreadful sight even for a collection of bones.

 

GOLDEN EYES (O.S.)

Come, come! Come play with me.

 

JAVIER enters the forest, crossing the line he has done so many times already.

 

GOLDEN EYES (O.S.)

Come! I want to play!

 

JAVIER runs further into the darkness, seduced by that voice.

 

GOLDEN EYES (O.S.)

Faster! Faster! Play with me Javier. Let’s play!

 

JAVIER stops running, realizing he’s been tricked by that voice. He’s been running but he hasn’t moved from where he is, the skeleton still there on the ground. He is recovering his breath when the GOLDEN EYES throw his rosary at his feet. They have gained a much more concrete form, not just the presence around him.

 

GOLDEN EYES

You are no fun Javier. Yuzuru would play with me.

 

The GOLDEN EYES have taken a much more human shape though looking like a huge cat too. A hybrid with a feline. Not human, not animal.

 

GOLDEN EYES

You took him and made him yours. Do you have any idea what you have done?

JAVIER

Did you read my mind?

 

The GOLDEN EYES circle him, like a predator checking its prey before devouring it. It purrs at JAVIER’s touch.

 

GOLDEN EYES

No. You’re the one to let me in.

JAVIER

You don’t exist. This is all a dream.

GOLDEN EYES

Just because the human eye can’t see, it doesn’t mean I don’t exist.

JAVIER

I can see you.

GOLDEN EYES

You’re special Javier.

JAVIER

You are a-

GOLDEN EYES

A monster? (It laughs) I am. So are you. And the boy you fucked at that altar.

 

JAVIER observes the GOLDEN EYES walk in front of him, stepping on the skeleton, trampling further the bones into powder. There is something very intimidating in the way they despise life.

 

GOLDEN EYES (CONT’D)

Tell me, was it good? Was Yuzuru tight enough? Did you come inside him? Did you force into him until he was crying?

 

JAVIER doesn’t answer but he imagines the described scenario.

 

GOLDEN EYES (CONT’D)

(screaming) DID YOU!?

 

JAVIER flinches, reduced to a boy being scolded for committing the heaviest of sins. His rosary burns the ground below his feet.

 

GOLDEN EYES (CONT’D)

Do you want him Javier? Do you love Yuzuru?

 

When JAVIER doesn’t answer again, they jump onto him, tackling him to the floor, gnawing on the neck, on the same spot he had strangled Yuzuru. It hurts.

 

GOLDEN EYES (CONT’D)

You will never leave.

 

They lick the wound on JAVIER, sucking on the bruised flesh. JAVIER moans.

 

GOLDEN EYES (CONT’D)

I love everything you hate Javi. And I will destroy everything you love.

 

52\. INT. JAVIER’S ROOM. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. RIGHT BEFORE DAWN.

It is very early in the morning, the sun still not up in the sky. PAULINE is already awake, observing YUZURU who is also awake but pretends to be sleeping. We get the feeling that this is not the first time she watches YUZURU sleeping out of curiosity. She removes the pillow case and puts it around YUZURU’s neck. She pulls the covers of the bed of her side and wraps those around YUZURU too. He looks like a cocoon.

 

YUZURU

(eyes still closed)

What are you doing?

PAULINE

Protecting you from the cold.

YUZURU

But I’m not cold.

PAULINE

I like it when you do this.

YUZURU

I like it the best when you can’t escape.

PAULINE

Ha! This is my revenge!

 

PAULINE jumps to YUZURU, the weight of her body falling on his. He instinctively contorts at the impact and hisses in pain. She is not heavy and she is not the source of pain. Shit, his back is sore from the rough sex and he can still feel JAVIER inside him.

 

PAULINE (CONT’D)

Sorry. Did I hurt you Yuzu?

YUZURU

(controlling his breathing)

No. I’m fine.

PAULINE

(after a moment of hesitation)

Did Javi hurt you last night? He made you cry.

 

YUZURU clenches his injured hand feeling the bandages there. He takes it out and brushes PAULINE’s hair, playing with the strands, curling them, as her head rests on his chest, on top of his heart. So it still beats.

 

YUZURU

(staring at the ceiling)

Javi will never hurt you.

 

PAULINE gets up and leaves the bed. She goes to her ladybug bag but ponders whether to open it or not. YUZURU sits the best he can, wrapped in the sheets and keeping the grimaces and groans to a minimum. He watches her back, her bad posture, her shoulders round.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

Pauline? What’s wrong princess?

 

She turns to him, the mask of the fox in her hands.

 

PAULINE

Is this what is hurting you?

YUZURU

Where did you find this?

PAULINE

(gripping the mask harder)

Why do you have this Yuzu?

 

YUZURU is sure he was always careful around her. He couldn’t drag her into this mess and into this world of sick, rotten people.

 

YUZURU

Give it to me Pauline.

PAULINE

(refusing)

Mommy loved it so much.

YUZURU

Please.

PAULINE

Mommy always asked you to dance for her. Because of this?

 

PAULINE is becoming noticeably upset. At finding the mask, at her memories of her mother, and at YUZURU’s lies.

 

PAULINE (CONT’D)

She didn’t let me see you.

YUZURU

Eliza will never hurt you again. Or me.

PAULINE

But this will.

 

She is crying, tears falling down her cheeks. She feels betrayed, alone, but a surge of determination seizes her.

 

PAULINE (CONT’D)

If I destroy this, no one can hurt you anymore.

 

She storms out of the room, barefoot, taking only the mask with her. YUZURU tries to stop her but tumbles over the sheets. The front door of the house closes.

When JAVIER comes, YUZURU is on his feet, hair disheveled and his hand bleeding. The bandages are already red. JAVIER too is still recovering from his own dream.

 

JAVIER

Yuzuru-

YUZURU

(in panic)

Pauline! Find her! Find her Javi. Please!

 

JAVIER grabs YUZURU by the shoulders, stopping his erratic movements. His eyes are sanguine, wild, like a beast being captured.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

They will hurt her! Let me go! You have to find her Javi!

 

53\. EXT. ON THE STREET. DAWN.

JAVIER is running around his residential area, the block of apartments desert in the early hours of the day. There are no cars and the traffic lights seem to change at their own will, alternating their colors randomly. There are stray dogs and beggars in the quiet alleys but PAULINE is nowhere to be seen.

He stops, hands on his knees, sweat running down his back and drenching his shirt. To be honest, he doesn’t know much about PAULINE, where her school is, where her house is, where she goes to play. Nothing. The same with YUZURU. But he cared about her. And she could be in danger. The ‘danger’ YUZURU had mentioned to him.

The church. No, that would be too far, wouldn’t it? She was there though last night, and the day before, and probably now. JAVIER runs again, the muscles of his core heavy and cramping. He had to hurry.

54\. INT. CHURCH. DAWN.

JAVIER enters through the side door again as if he knew all the corners of that place as his own home. There is no one on the sanctuary or on the nave, complete silence, except for the cracking wood of the benches. The stained-glass panels made the place darker in hues of blue and red and it was uncharacteristically cold.

He falls to his knees, overrun by fatigue but it is then that he hears PAULINE’s voice, distant and muddled. He looks around, she is not there. He walks to the altar and looks up. PAULINE is standing over the railing on the top floor. YUZURU is there too. It looks like a déjà vu.

ON THE TOP FLOOR

PAULINE has her back leaning on the railing, the fox mask still in her hand. Her feet are bleeding, scratched by the concrete pavement and pierced by glass shards and splinters. They are covered in dust and soil, dirty and lacerated. It is as if she doesn’t feel the pain or has suppressed it.

 

YUZURU

Come here Pauline. Please.

PAULINE

There’s no angel missing here. I looked at all the paintings but no angel is missing Yuzu.

 

YUZURU doesn’t dare to approach or touch her, as if he would contaminate or corrupt her with his whole being.

 

PAULINE (CONT’D)

Why is there no place for you Yuzu?

YUZURU

Let’s go home Pauline. Nothing else matters.

PAULINE

Is it because of this? (she lifts the mask, her hand trembling)

YUZURU

You’re hurt Pauline.

PAULINE

You can heal me Yuzu. Like the butterfly. Like mommy. Like Javi.

YUZURU

Don’t make me do this.

PAULINE

(sobbing again)

Why!? Why not me?

 

The mask slips her hand and falls to the ground floor. The impact resonates throughout the church. PAULINE looks down, the tiny shattered pieces terrifying and intriguing her at the same time. If only she could pick them up again. If only she could fly.

 

PAULINE (CONT’D)

You are not an angel Yuzu.

 

YUZURU shakes his head, telling her she was wrong. We get a glimpse of another facet of YUZURU’s vulnerability, different from the one he has shown JAVIER. This one is of remorse, of guilt, of trying to compensate for the pain he has brought her.

 

PAULINE (CONT’D)

You are a monster.

 

And she turns around. She could fly to the shards of the fox. She jumps.


	7. Chapter VII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Of angels, monsters and memories - another side of the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear readers, here comes a chapter from a different POV from the usual one. I hope it provides a few more answers.
> 
> Note 1: This is a work of fiction and it's never enough to say that this is all a product of my frustrated, twisted mind.
> 
> Note 2: There might be some references to child abuse in this chapter. Read with caution if you're uncomfortable with it.
> 
> Note 3: I'm not trying to write porn, though sex is a major theme in this story.
> 
> ENJOY <3

55\. MONTAGE. MEMORIES FROM YUZURU. TIME IS UNKNOWN, SAND IN AN HOURGLASS. PART 1

 

\- ‘Angel’

 

\- YUZURU stumbles across a man who was shot on the side of his abdomen. It is an ugly wound and he is already delirious with fever, eyes barely open. He threatens YUZURU with a knife, though his hands are shaking so much he drops the blade. YUZURU heals him and goes away. The man keeps mumbling through his hallucinations, calling him a monster.

 

\- ‘Monster’

 

\- YUZURU is seen feeding a pair of black swans, apparently lost in their journey towards the spring of a river. One has a lacerated palmate. He is seen healing it by a YOUNG GIRL, her hair full of feathers, who introduces herself as a bird breeder. She asks YUZURU to do the same to her. He refuses. She insists, saying she needs a miracle. He pretends to give her one. She pretends to believe in it.

They meet occasionally, she becoming paler and paler, still a myriad of feathers in her head, by the same riverbank.

 

GIRL WITH FEATHERS

There are no miracles in this world.

YUZURU

(throwing a pebble in the water)

There no angels in the world too.

 

She gives him a long, red feather.

 

GIRL WITH FEATHERS

There are. They just lost their wings. Won’t that make them humans?

 

She seems to be able to pluck quite a few feathers from her hair to make a tiny bracelet. She also gives it to YUZURU. He leans forward and kisses her on the lips, gentle, feeling the life in her draining as she breathes. She is not flushed and smiles, ear to ear, as tears fall from her cheeks.

 

GIRL WITH FEATHERS (CONT’D)

Now I believe in miracles.

 

\- ‘Angel’

 

\- A pair of twins stay after a mass contemplating one of the stained-glass panels. The one with two angels, one with a sword and the other a scepter. From far, they look just like them.

 

YUZURU

They’re always together. Like an extension of each other.

TWIN #1

We too. We can’t be separated.

TWIN #2

We share our blood, our bodies, our souls. _Everything_.

 

Later we see YUZURU in their home, extravagant and upscale but homely and cozy, full of personality. The three of them have sex, the twins lavishing YUZURU with attention, behind, in front, inside, on the outside. As one of the twins bites the other too briskly on the neck, it draws blood. In the haze of their pleasure, YUZURU heals him, much to their surprise. It makes them think he could be the light above the angels in the glass panel. They penetrate YUZURU deeper, with more want and lack of control.

YUZURU enjoys the bliss of their touch but his moans are empty and missing, absent of the distress and ache he so much needed.

He doesn’t pursue this arrangement anymore. Yet, one of the twins keeps coming to the church at unexpected times, alone, seeking for YUZURU’s attention. YUZURU reluctantly agrees to be with him. This twin drives him to the outskirts of the city, a viewpoint where no one goes.

 

TWIN #2

I missed you so much Yuzuru. You said you wouldn’t leave. You called my name that night. Didn’t you miss me?

YUZURU

I want to go back.

TWIN #2

(kissing YUZURU’s fingers, worshipping them)

It is because of him, isn’t it? Another one like me. The same face, same nose, same lips. I’ll kiss you differently Yuzuru. I’ll suck you until your cock dries like he can’t. I’ll make love to you my way. Only me now Yuzuru.

 

YUZURU kisses him and the twin melts in his seat, his hands on the steering wheel. He almost comes when YUZURU traces his teeth, behind them, the roof of his mouth, his lower gums, with his own tongue. YUZURU stops the kiss immediately when he feels a hand on his neck.

 

YUZURU

Now drive me back home.

TWIN #2

(shaking with anger)

You’re thinking of him, aren’t you? We are not kids anymore. I’ll leave him. He can survive without me. I don’t need him anymore. Is this what you want Yuzuru? I will not share you anymore. You’ll be only mine. Does this make you happy? To be only mine?

 

The next time YUZURU sees him, his eyes are glistening like glass shards, his face swollen, his neck horribly bruised in dark purple shades, the contour of the different fingers clearly visible. His brother is next to him, face down, but also bloated like a balloon. They both sleep peacefully in the river, drowned.

 

\- ‘Monster’

 

\- YUZURU runs back to the church, disgusted with himself, as if he would vomit all the water the twins had drunk. FATHER SHEM has just finished wiping the feet of the man in the cross when YUZURU comes in, frightened, bewildered. YUZURU falls to FATHER SHEM’s feet, hugging both his knees, asking for forgiveness. FATHER SHEM extends his hands and YUZURU kisses them.

 

\- ‘Angel’

 

\- YUZURU is seen lying outside, on the alley at the back of the church, his head next to a bunch of abandoned kittens. Their nails are not sharp enough to dig into his skin as they move their paws over his ears and forehead. YUZURU falls sleeps next to them. Cats don’t betray others like humans do.

 

\- ‘Monster’ -

 

YUZURU is performing as LADY FOX in Lotus. ELIZA is in the audience and she is totally infatuated. It’s not the first time she comes. When the performance ends, ELIZA goes to meet her idol in the dressing room.

 

LADY FOX

I wonder how much you have paid to see me.

ELIZA

You’re worth every penny.

LADY FOX

I’m not here to entertain you.

ELIZA

I love you.

LADY FOX

They all do. All my fans. All my patrons. All of them who sat next to you.

ELIZA

I don’t care who you are. The one I love is Lady Fox.

LADY FOX

A lie. You love a lie. The _Nightingale of Inferno_ loving _Lady Fox_. The prey after the predator.

ELIZA

I’m flattered you know who I am.

LADY FOX

Hardly.

ELIZA

That’s enough for me. I’m not looking for romance.

LADY FOX

I can’t offer you anything.

ELIZA

You’re what I need. Lady Fox. You’re the monster I always yearned for. You’re all the parts of me that I’m scared to look at in the mirror.

 

YUZURU takes off the fox mask and gives it to her. His face is still full of heavy makeup. ELIZA takes the mask and immediately inhales it, delighted in the perfume it exudes. She brings it down her chest, her navel, until it rests between her legs. She presses it against her sex, on top of her khaki pants. It is a very sensual dance and YUZURU is drawn to it.

 

LADY FOX/YUZURU

Leave now.

 

ELIZA approaches YUZURU and kisses him, sitting on his lap. Her desire is electrifying and he can feel the truth in her words from before. How much had she longed for this moment? He wonders if he will ever desire someone like that, with passion so seemingly leaking from her mouth. His erection is growing.

 

ELIZA

You are Lady Fox. No one else.

 

YUZURU and ELIZA have sex in her room. YUZURU is no longer dressed as the courtesan LADY FOX but ELIZA thinks he is and calls him so, even when she’s lying down, legs open. YUZURU doesn’t enter her though.

 

\- ‘Monster’

 

\- YUZURU is preparing to leave ELIZA’s house, she sleeping soundly, basked in her afterglow, when he hears the sound of some hard object falling. He thought she lived alone. His curiosity is intrusive but he follows it anyway and he sees a little girl, PAULINE, trying to reach a high cupboard on her tiptoes. She is innocent and pure, everything he wasn’t. She notices him but she doesn’t stop what she’s doing.

 

PAULINE

Are you mommy’s new boyfriend?

YUZURU

No. What are you looking for?

 

He approaches her, overseeing the inside of the cupboard. There’s nothing there.

 

PAULINE

I’m hungry.

 

He checks the other cupboards, finding nothing ready to eat except for a packet of flower and sugar, both new.

 

YUZURU

Do you have milk?

 

Pauline runs to the fridge and luckily there’s a small packet of strawberry milkshake. She gives it to YUZURU.

 

PAULINE

You’re kind. Mommy’s boyfriends never talk to me.

YUZURU

I’m not your mommy’s boyfriend.

 

He mixes the three ingredients, improvising a recipe.

 

YUZURU

Do you like pancakes?

 

Pauline nods vigorously and she stares at YUZURU, as if it was the first time someone cared about her.

 

PAULINE

Can I hug you?

 

YUZURU is already crouching, his fingers full of flour as she tugs him into the mop of her blond hair. She is warm. A warmth he had never felt before.

 

PAULINE (CONT’D)

I’m Pauline. People always make fun of my name.

YUZURU

It’s a gorgeous name.

 

She sneezes at the shower of flour as she moves her head but YUZURU only ruffles her strands even more.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

I’m Yuzuru. Don’t tell your mommy.

PAULINE

A secret between us?

YUZURU

Only us.

 

56\. INT. NAVE. CHURCH. EARLY MORNING.

BACK TO THE PRESENT.

YUZURU is on the floor, barely conscious, his head bleeding from an open cut. His arms are scrapped over, also bleeding. PAULINE is lying on top of his chest, completely unharmed. She is not sure what had happened. JAVIER has witnessed the fall though, YUZURU leaping right after PAULINE jumped, taking the flight for her, shielding her fragile body with his.

JAVIER hadn’t been quick enough to catch him. It scared him that they would plunge into the darkness as he did but he swears there were wings and YUZURU really did fly. It is a hauntingly beautiful image. Now kneeling next to him, he can still hear YUZURU’s breathing. Should he touch him or not?

 

PAULINE

(moving aside as her weight seems to be causing pain to YUZURU)

Yuzu! I’m sorry Yuzu. Please don’t die.

 

YUZURU smiles, his hand going for her hair but he misses it.

 

PAULINE (CONT’D)

You’re not a monster Yuzu. I was wrong. I’m sorry.

JAVIER

He’s going to be fine Pauline.

 

JAVIER lifts YUZURU from the ground, the blood staining his T-shirt, to bring him to the nearest comfortable bench. He is even lighter than before, more fragile, ready to disappear any moment in his arms. YUZURU nudges closer, his face resting at the crook of JAVIER’s neck.

 

YUZURU

(very low voice)

Where’s Pauline?

JAVIER

She’s here. You saved her.

 

PAULINE grasps YUZURU’s hand but he has no strength to reciprocate the gesture and his arms fall limp over hers.

 

YUZURU

Don’t let her go.

JAVIER

(bringing YUZURU tighter to him)

I won’t.

YUZURU

(whispering) You smell so good Javi.

JAVIER

Just be quiet before you hurt yourself anymore.

 

JAVIER stops as well as PAULINE as FATHER SHEM comes, clearly angry. Even YUZURU can feel it.

 

YUZURU

(on his last conscious effort)

This is a good chance to kill me Javi.

 

JAVIER’s body is warm. So warm. A warmth he will never have. He loses himself in it.

57\. MONTAGE. MEMORIES FROM YUZURU. THE HOURGLASS IS TURNED OVER. PART 2

 

\- YUZURU keeps coming to ELIZA’s place at her request. She enjoys his company and it satisfies her sexual fantasies, though all there is is an exploration of his body, just her hands and mouth, nothing further. YUZURU comes for PAULINE’s company and his attention is solely for her.

 

\- One night, ELIZA brings him home and PAULINE is nowhere to be seen. ELIZA is not her usual self, desperation leaking though her pores. She ties the fox mask around YUZURU’s eyes, kissing the object, worshipping it again.

 

ELIZA

Tell Lady Fox to be back. Throw away all the gentleness.

 

She applies foundation on YUZURU’s face, brushes gold powder and an apple pink blush to his cheeks like a doll. She finishes with her favorite strawberry, metallic lip gloss. She is extremely excited at her creation.

 

ELIZA (CONT’D)

You’re so beautiful. I would do anything for you.

 

She kisses YUZURU with wanton, trying to coax the same reaction from him. Their mingled tongues are showered in the sugary luster but YUZURU tastes something different mixed in it.

 

YUZURU

Where were you earlier?

 

She shakes her head in negation. YUZURU invades her mouth again and he moans at _that_ taste. It is not hers. And it cradles him like a drug. He pushes her to the bed, his lips tracing her neck, searching for more. She smells of jasmine flowers but also of sweat that is not hers and musk. He licks her nipples, between her breast, and the scent is even stronger. It makes his knees weak.

 

YUZURU

Who were you with earlier?

 

ELIZA is lost in her world, her mind fogged with the renewed passion of her Lady Fox. YUZURU continues down, he spreads her legs apart and licks her labia. YUZURU finds himself moaning from the back of his throat, consumed by the remnants of the other person in her.

For the first time, he enters her and he cries with craving and fervor. Not because she’s inviting him and enticing him with her appetite, but because he can feel that aphrodisiac, the semen of the stranger that was in her now blending with his own hardened cock. It’s too much. He wants that stranger and that stranger only. It’s frustrating. It gnaws the insides of his stomach and jolts his erection like no one before.

He disjoints himself from ELIZA, brushing her hand away callously as he leaves her room.

 

\- ELIZA insists for LADY FOX to forgive her, that she will never be with _him_ again, a fling for her boredom and YUZURU is disappointed at that. He wants that taste, that essence and only that. She showers him in caresses that are annoying and devoid of any affectionate response from him. Even her bedsheets, in its sophisticated patchouli veil, is revolting to him. Just then, he hears a kick coming from the wardrobe and he diverts his gaze to it. It moves again.

 

ELIZA

(pressing his hips between her inner thighs)

Don’t go.

YUZURU

Release me.

ELIZA

(she moves aside)

Please don’t go.

 

YUZURU stands up, fully dressed, only his zipper open and his shirt wrinkled with ELIZA’s pulling fixation. He walks to the wooden closet and tries to open it. The door is locked from the outside. He can hear the sobs of a child – PAULINE. He rummages through ELIZA’s dressing table and finds a small cooper key. Luckily it fits. Inside, PAULINE is coiled in the confined, claustrophobic partition, her face completely red from crying. The lower part of her dress is wet, a smell of urine in the air. YUZURU immediately holds her to him.

 

PAULINE

(exhausted) I was so scared. So scared. So dark. It was all dark.

YUZURU

(patting her head)

It’s alright. No one will hurt you again. No one.

 

He lifts her, a child, a baby in his arms, damaged.

 

ELIZA

She is a mistake. She doesn’t deserve your love.

YUZURU

I will never forgive you.

 

\- YUZURU is playing with PAULINE in the park, amazed at her smile and courage. A street artist plays RIVERDANCE and he lets the pagan prayer sink to his bones, moving his feet in an offering to the sun to grant him the same tenacity. He notices a man, sat on one of the benches around the central fountain. Devilishly handsome, hair wild in hazelnut locks and staring intently at him. Another fool. He approaches him, convinced he is like all others, all the others.

He wishes he hadn’t gone over. His chest hitches for a split second as he watches the stranger take another sip of his coffee. He sits next to him, pretending that he was not affected by his presence. It’s caffeine but also _that_ sweet scent, so enticing that seized his spine and made him ache for more. Mr. Stranger.

 

YUZURU

So you trust fate?

JAVIER

You don’t?

YUZURU

_Maybe._

 

Maybe fate did exist. And miracles. And redemption.

 

\- YUZURU is playing RAINDROPS PRELUDE by Chopin in the church when ELIZA comes and sits next to him. He ignores her, his mind and heart with Mr. Stranger.

 

ELIZA

Won’t you call Lady Fox for me? I’m sorry.

 

YUZURU keeps playing, each note louder and more dramatic.

 

ELIZA (CONT’D)

It’s jealousy. I was jealous. What does that child have that I don’t? How has she seduced you? She is a monster. She should have never been born. But Lady Fox won’t mind. Lady Fox only loves me.

 

When she holds YUZURU’s hand, he presses down on the keys with such a force that the chords resonate though the walls. He looks at her directly in the eyes.

 

YUZURU

Do you love me?

ELIZA

 _Yes_. Yes, more than anything. I don’t need anyone else.

YUZURU

Would you do anything for me?

ELIZA

Yes. Anything. Anything you want.

 

YUZURU opens his arms. She lunges into him. YUZURU kisses her on the lips, eager, with the hunger that she always wanted.

 

YUZURU

(whispering to her ear)

I want you to die.

 

He leaves her in the stool like a piece of worn out cloth as he leaves.

 

\- YUZURU tries sacramental wine, undiluted, from FATHER SHEM’s chalice. If he’s a monster, it should kill him. He takes a tentative sip. IT should burn his throat, rip his liver apart, twist his gut until they torn and shred, and melt his bones. It doesn’t. He’s fine. He keeps drinking. Why can’t it kill him?

 

58\. INT. FATHER SHEM’S CHAMBER. CHURCH. MORNING.

BACK TO THE PRESENT.

We see FATHER SHEM’s attending to YUZURU’s cuts, the cloth in his hands already crimson and the clerical collar drenched in his own sweat. YUZURU sits in FATHER SHEM’s armchair as if not feeling any pain at all. His inner turmoil seems to be the true source of his misery.

 

FATHER SHEM

What are you thinking my beautiful boy?

YUZURU

There is no fate. If there was, I wouldn’t be here.

 

FATHER SHEM bandages YUZURU’s arm, his fingers skillfully treading the cotton gauze and strips around the elbow meticulously.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

Where is Pauline? Where is Javier?

FATHER SHEM

They left. I told them to leave.

YUZURU

Where?

FATHER SHEM

Where they will not find you again.

YUZURU

(wrenching his arm away in anger)

I’m not your god.

FATHER SHEM

No. You’re a lost lamb who needs guidance to the light. You’re here to save people from their darkest wishes and to banish those who escaped hell back to it. My martyr.

 

YUZURU stands up and walks to the door but FATHER SHEM blocks his way.

 

FATHER SHEM (CONT’D)

Where do you want to go? To them? To Javier? (he extends his hands, palms facing up, like before, expecting the kiss YUZURU always gave him) You won’t find him.

 

YUZURU refuses again and walks past FATHER SHEM. The latter grabs him by the loose bandages and pushes him to the wall, their bodies pressed together, the impact on YUZURU’s head registering a sharp pain. FATHER SHEM forces his palms to meet YUZURU’s lips, one after the other, feeling the air exhaled through YUZURU’s nose on his skin. YUZURU bites him, his canines tearing deep down his muscles.

 

FATHER (CONT’D)

What has changed my beautiful boy?

YUZURU

You’re _sick._

 

YUZURU can feel FATHER SHEM’s erection through his cassock. The older man steps back, proving YUZURU the escape route he wants.

 

FATHER SHEM

(smirking) I will never act upon what my body wants. I do not desire you, my beautiful boy.

 

YUZURU looks defiantly and walks quickly to the door, his hands trembling as they hold the knob.

 

FATHER SHEM (CONT’D)

But you Yuzuru, you only know how to destroy. Fate exists and this is yours. You’re not the spider in the web. You’re the dragonfly with one wing eaten and he will soon come for the other one. Miracles exist Yuzuru, but you will never have one.

 

YUZURU walks out, never looking back.


	8. Chapter VIII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How can one distinguish what is real and what is a dream?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear readers, I'm finally done with my exams (yay!) but now dreading for the grades to come out. I'm currently on a mini holiday so this chapter was written in the airport and during my flight. I've also decided that it is almost time to finish it so I'm closing this plot soon, in two more chapters. 
> 
> The usual disclaimers apply. This is a product of my deprived mind and it's completely fictional. Stress the fiction part.

59\. EXT. STREET. LATE MORNING.

JAVIER and PAULINE are walking along a street unseen so far. It is far from the center of the city. It has been a long walk, but none has bothered with checking the time and hopping into buses just to see the facades of houses passing by. JAVIER looks occasionally at PAULINE, her lace shoes kicking a few pebbles on the pavement, covering them in dirt, her hand adjusting the sleeves at every opportunity. JAVIER is dying to light a cigarette, to inhale the nicotine-filled smoke until he stifled to confirm that he was indeed alive. He doesn’t though, and he throws the packet, half full, in the nearest trash can. Throw it away, like he had done with YUZURU when he left him in the church, in the hands of FATHER SHEM. JAVIER stops walking and looks at his own hands. They are clean, perfectly smooth and hydrated. No, there’s YUZURU’s blood on them.

 

FATHER SHEM (IN A FLASHBACK)

You can’t wash them clean anymore. There is no worst sin than the one you’ve committed.

 

JAVIER wakes from his trance when PAULINE interlaces her fingers with his. She looks very tired, still marks of tears on her cheeks, her eyes and nose red.

 

FATHER SHEM (IN A FLASHBACK)

What are you going to do Javier?

 

JAVIER lifts PAULINE in a piggyback ride, just like before. She hugs his shoulders and his waist as well with her legs. JAVIER holds tight to her as he resumes the pace.

 

PAULINE

Will Yuzuru still want me?

JAVIER

Were you not scared when you jumped?

PAULINE

If I could fly, I could be an angel and save Yuzuru.

JAVIER

(leaning his head to meet her embrace)

You saved him. He will come back to you. Like you told me once.

PAULINE

(reticent) Are you not scared of me?

JAVIER

(smiling) You’re the prettiest date I’ve ever had. And the smartest. And the funniest.

 

They walk in silence, though less suffocating and the uneasiness dissipating in the beats of the traffic lights. PAULINE guides JAVIER through different corners and small gardens, pointing at random directions. JAVIER recognizes the neighborhood though.

 

PAULINE

(yawning) I’m tired.

JAVIER

(his back starting to feel sore)

Would you like to meet my sister?

PAULINE

You have a sister?

JAVIER

Her name’s Laura. She lives around here. We could get some hot chocolate and you could sleep a little.

 

PAULINE slides off his back, looking worried but she can’t suppress another yawn. JAVIER is caught in it as well and does one of his own. They both laugh. They are completely oblivious to the people around them. They sit in the nearest fountain of a park.

 

PAULINE

(playing with the water)

How about Yuzu? Will he be alright?

JAVIER

I promise I’ll find him. And then we can go home. The three of us.

PAULINE

Will you make Yuzuru happy? He is alone. He has no one.

JAVIER

(tying her hair into two pigtails)

He has you.

PAULINE

But Yuzu needs you. He told me that he needs you.

JAVIER

(turning her to face him directly)

We will always be together.

 

PAULINE extends her pinky finger and JAVIER meets hers with his in a shared promise. Their own pact. They resume their walking, now aiming at a clear direction. They are so lost in their giggles that they notice too late a large Great Dane, collared and with a leash, running into their path. It must have escaped its owner. PAULINE screams at the sudden looming figure but JAVIER is quick enough to move in front of her as the dog tackles him to the floor. Its golden eyes are locked in his throat and it growls as it readies to sink its fangs into his flesh. Luckily the owner arrives in time and she pulls the dog by the leash, immediately restraining it.

 

OWNER

Mizpah! What are you doing? Bad boy!

 

The dog tries to assault JAVIER again but she pulls again, with even more strength. She is out of breath but there is still enough energy stored in her body to subdue the dog. It soon sits, tail between the legs and ears down. It doesn’t look menacing anymore. JAVIER gets up with the help of PAULINE who dusts off the dirt in his pants. JAVIER’s palms are scratched but they don’t bleed profusely.

 

OWNER (CONT’D)

I’m so sorry! Mizpah is never aggressive, especially to children.

JAVIER

No one’s hurt, that’s what is important.

OWNER

But your hands! If you would like to go to a doctor-

JAVIER

Your dog was probably frightened by something on the way here.

 

The owner off the dog apologizes some more before walking away, her face disturbed and scowling the dog.

 

PAULINE

Are you okay Javi?

 

JAVIER nods yes, that it was only a few abrasion scratches. He looks at the bruises. It is a delicate cut pattern, corroding the skin of his palm that didn’t look like an accident. And it is in the same hand as YUZURU’s cut. _Coincidences_. JAVIER leads PAULINE to LAURA’s apartment.

 

PAULINE (CONT’D)

What does Laura look like?

JAVIER

(ignoring his injury and shoving his hands into his pockets)

She is _Olivia_ , but with long hair and a laughter like a lion’s roar.

PAULINE

Olivia?

JAVIER

 _Snow White_ then. But with a tan and wearing pants.

 

PAULINE laughs at his description.

 

JAVIER (CONT’D)

She hasn’t found her Prince Charming yet, but don’t tell her I’ve told you this.

PAULINE

Will she be angry at you?

JAVIER

She will. Then she will turn into a witch with eyes spitting fire.

 

PAULINE looks as if she is plotting a mischievous plan. JAVIER is relieved to see her be the child she should be.

 

JAVIER (CONT’D)

If you tell her I called her a witch, you’ll not have pancakes for a month.

PAULINE

(raising her voice)

That’s mean! Javi is mean!

 

JAVIER laughs heartily, even when his hand stings.

 

60\. MONTAGE. THROUGHOUT THE MORNING AND AFTERNOON. THIS SWITCHES BETWEEN YUZURU’S PERSPECTIVE AS HE LEFT THE CHURCH AND JAVIER’S POINT OF VIEW AFTER PAULINE FALLING ASLEEP IN LAURA’S HOME.

Music cue: LOST IN LAS VEGAS – Two Steps From Hell

 

\- YUZURU is seen walking down the steps of the church. He takes one last look at the building, still feeling the presence of FATHER SHEM on his back. A group of middle aged women pass by, conspicuously eyeing him for his rough appearance, and he just smiles at them falsely. YUZURU runs away, a breeze against his damaged skin, painful like knives just sharpened. He could care less about the pain. He keeps running.

 

\- JAVIER is seen walking out of LAURA’s place, hands in his pockets still, his way of hiding the injury. He looks up to the sky, to the clouds that were starting to gather. He too starts running. - YUZURU is standing in front of JAVIER’s main door. He tries to open it but it is properly locked. He curses under his ragging breath. He rings the bell. The chime of a recurring nursery rhyme is extremely annoying and it plays until the end. No one answers the door. He tries again and again. Still, no one opens the door. With his hands drawn into fists, YUZURU hits the door, pleading it to open and let him in, as a child already punished enough for misbehaving. He continues to pound harder until a neighbor appears and threatens to call the police for his vandalism. YUZURU apologizes and leaves.

 

\- JAVIER is back to the church, certain the YUZURU is still there, in the arms of FATHER SHEM. It angers him just to think of YUZURU kissing those pair of hands in submission. He goes in but neither men are there. He instinctively goes to the mezzanine floor and looks down from the railing. The broken fragments of Lady Fox’s mask are still there, disseminated around, never to be assembled again. He looks at the empty altar, remembering how YUZURU gave himself to him. He feels the pressure of YUZURU’s palm on his waist, pushing him forward.

FATHER SHEM (IN A FLASHBACK)

What will you do?

 

\- YUZURU is back to the beginning, to the fountain of the fallen angel. The same street musician is there, this time playing CALON LÂN, in his acoustic guitar. The usual skaters, people in their jogging sessions, and uniformized white collars are there. Except JAVIER and PAULINE. He looks again at the statue – it mocks him of his arrogance and his naivety for believing that he could for once break the cycle. YUZURU splashes water on it just to shut up these voices in his head.

 

\- JAVIER is back home. He sees a piece of bloodied bandage at the door and he searches frantically for his keys, believing YUZURU must be inside. He is not. There isn’t a single presence in the house, not in the kitchen, not in the bathroom, not in the sofa nor at the dining table. He throws his keys away to a corner, furious and desperate for the missing angel. His bed still smells of vanilla and he buries into his bedsheets, pressing his body down into them. He is calling YUZURU’s name like a chant.

 

\- YUZURU is walking aimlessly through the streets, echoing JAVIER’s earlier state of indifference, of defeat and resignation towards something one really wants but can’t have. In every father and daughter he sees, every laughter a sister shares with her brother, and every affectionate prank between a primary school girl and her best male friend, YUZURU longs for PAULINE and JAVIER to magically materialize in front of him.

FATHER SHEM (IN A FLASHBACK)

You’ll never have a miracle.

YUZURU’s head shakes in denial but his heart agrees with it.

 

\- JAVIER is walking back to LAURA’s apartment, thinking of what to tell PAULINE. She will be devastated to know that YUZURU suddenly vanished and that perhaps he wouldn’t come back. No, he will. No, he won’t. He will come back for PAULINE. But he won’t come back for him. No, he will find them. He will find PAULINE and spoil her all she deserves. He will be back and take PAULINE away. Far away. Somewhere he can’t find them again. JAVIER stops on a small bridge connecting the two shores of a river. YUZURU and PAULINE. Could he really let them go? Yes, he could. And he would do it. He will continue with the life he had, drinks and debauchery. A white swam swims below the river, snorting loudly, which catches JAVIER’s attention unexpectedly.

 

61\. EXT. RIVERBANK. LATE AFTERNOON

JAVIER betrays immediately his own resolve and he walks hastily to YUZURU who is lying down by the dry shore of a low tide. He has his forearm over his eyes like someone who forgot their shades and is too sensitive to light. JAVIER sits next to YUZURU, their knees drawn to his chest.

 

YUZURU

I thought you wouldn’t walk down here.

JAVIER

I thought I would never find you again.

 

YUZURU sneers at that, not at JAVIER but at himself.

 

YUZURU

Perhaps it would have been better.

JAVIER

(shifting his sitting position)

Perhaps.

YUZURU

Don’t touch me.

 

But JAVIER already has his hand on his forearm, a confirmation that he is really there. Yuzuru turns his head away, so their eyes won’t meet.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

Where’s Pauline?

JAVIER

(holding Yuzuru by the chin and jaw)

She’s safe. She’s waiting for you.

YUZURU

(relaxing in the touch)

She tried to fly. I will put her in danger again.

 

JAVIER caresses YUZURU under the chin, feeling the swallowing motion at his fingertips.

 

JAVIER

She trusts you. And you can heal people.

YUZURU

(shaking his head)

I’ll never heal her.

JAVIER

Why?

 

YUZURU is quiet. He closes his eyes and shakes his head again.

 

YUZURU

(eyes still closed)

It would only bring her misery.

JAVIER

You can’t change her mind.

 

YUZURU picks up a small pebble at his elbow, he sits and he throws it away to the water. The swan is frightened and swims in the opposite direction, leaving them alone.

 

YUZURU

No one deserves such misery. Why live if you can only suffer?

 

JAVIER picks up a stone of his own and throws it to the same spot as YUZURU’s. He thinks it’s the same spot.

 

JAVIER

How about you?

 

JAVIER once again seeks for eye contact.

 

JAVIER (CONT’D)

You’re allowed to suffer?

YUZURU

Stop.

JAVIER

Heal me. (he extends his hand)

YUZURU

Why are you doing this?

JAVIER

Because you asked me to grant you a wish.

YUZURU

It’s enough Javi.

 

JAVIER grabs YUZURU’s hand and brings his fingers to his lips, mimicking the kiss of life from YUZURU.

 

JAVIER

Heal me. Heal me until you can’t anymore. Because then-

 

JAVIER kisses YUZURU, tempted by his pink lips in denial, not the angel or demon who first pulled him in. YUZURU too is hungry for the kiss, returning it as soon as JAVIER’s lips has touched his. He wants his smell, his scent, his essence, his energy fill him in the same awe and exasperation as when he first met him inside another’s body. JAVIER pulls away first, his expression serious and determined.

 

JAVIER (CONT’D)

(voice is low) Because then I will kill you.

 

YUZURU trembles in excitement.

62\. INT. JAVIER’S BATHROOM. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. EARLY EVENING.

YUZURU looks at himself in the mirror, his hair growing long enough to hinder his eyesight. He still has the mark on his neck that JAVIER has carved in him, in faint shades of rose. He tears the bandages on his arms, revealing the abrasion cuts and dark bruises, dark crimson and lavender. They illustrate perfectly how truly beaten, broken and damaged he is. JAVIER comes in, new bandages and disinfectant in his possession. He looks at YUZURU from behind, both their faces in the mirror. YUZURU doesn’t turn around.

 

JAVIER

Does it hurt?

YUZURU

(shaking his head)

Father Shem is used to them.

JAVIER

Did you have sex with him?

 

YUZURU looks down at the basin and continues shaking his head. JAVIER can’t see it but YUZURU’s expression is one of relief.

 

YUZURU

He doesn’t trust you.

JAVIER

I haven’t given him a reason to trust me.

YUZURU

He knows I like you.

JAVIER

Do you?

 

YUZURU turns around but JAVIER gestures him to revert back to the original pose.

 

JAVIER

Look at the mirror. I want to see your back.

 

YUZURU obeys, his eyes meeting with JAVIER’s in the mirror. He feels exposed but also stirred by JAVIER’s fascination for him. He could ask him to complete the canvas and cover him in even more wounds.

 

YUZURU

Do you think I’m a dragonfly?

JAVIER

Caught in a spider’s web?

 

YUZURU nods yes, his body moving slightly at the chilly draft. JAVIER touches one of the cuts in his shoulder blade in a feathery manner, almost tiptoeing with his fingertips. The abrasion cuts did look like wings, spread out and caught in the silk cobweb, holding him hostage.

 

JAVIER (CONT’D)

Not a fly, definitely a dragon.

 

YUZURU smiles, giving JAVIER permission to continue ripping apart the protein fibers spun around him. He reaches his arms to touch JAVIER but he diverts the motion and pushes him against the cold porcelain sink.

Thrust from one web to another.

 

JAVIER (CONT’D)

Don’t move.

 

YUZURU’s bruises are no wings anymore but a large serpent coiling around him, protecting him from further harm. JAVIER kisses the tattooed snake’s head at the nape of YUZURU’s head, its tongue swirling to the crook of his neck, the scaled body trailing his armpit and the side of his ribcage, the depression between each rib. JAVIER traces the serpent, a path on YUZURU’s arms and back, a game of labyrinth until he finds the lost treasure. His hands rests just right on the coccyx, at the base of his spine, where the snake’s tail is. If YUZURU’s jeans were not in the place, he would have plunged further down.

They are both hard, one from touching and the other from being touched. JAVIER rubs himself on YUZURU, earning him a low grunt.

 

JAVIER (CONT’D)

You’re hurt so you can’t have more. It would only injure you further.

 

YUZURU is having none of that warning so he reclines back, half of his weight on JAVIER, he himself rubbing against his erection as he drops his head back. It rests next to his ear, the warm puffs of air sending shivers down his spine.

 

YUZURU

(whispering) Touch me.

JAVIER

Heal me.

YUZURU

_No._

JAVIER

Heal me _Yuzu_ and I’ll make you come. Let me give you what you truly want.

 

YUZURU reluctantly kisses JAVIER’s bruised palm, the taste of lemon soap and blood mixing with his saliva. JAVIER feels a surge of life enter his veins, straight to the ending of all his nerves and he moans at that vigor and zest that shakes him from the core. He is harder than ever.

 

JAVIER (CONT’D)

(whispering at Yuzuru’s ears)

_Good boy._

 

YUZURU nods, anticipating what might possibly come. JAVIER’s hand, now healed, descends to the waistband of YUZURU’s jeans and pulls down the zipper. The briefs are wet already, the red crown protruding through the underwear, swollen and sensitive.

 

YUZURU

(panting) Will you... grant me my wish?

 

JAVIER plunges his hand inside the stained fabric, grabbing YUZURU’s manhood with a painful grip. It’s slick, slippery and pulsating in his fingers.

 

JAVIER

 _Yes_. I’ll kill you Yuzuru. (his hands descend further, cupping the balls and returning to the tip in not so gentle, rough strokes for the lack of freedom) So you can reborn again.

YUZURU

(biting his lips to suppress a moan)

A new life?

 

JAVIER continues to caress YUZURU’s sex, languidly slow going up but impatiently quick going down. It’s a torturous pace but YUZURU’s irises are full blown with lust and JAVIER loves to see him writhe and beg, as if all his existence depended on him alone. It empowers him. He wants that power. He will hurt him. And then love him. He will break him. And then pierce him back together. He will be the predator and not the prey.

 

JAVIER

A new _Yuzuru_.

 

YUZURU comes all over JAVIER’s fingers and his abdomen, a loud moan escaping his parted lips. The mirror reflects them both slightly blurred, cheeks flushed and drowned in ecstatic bliss. YUZURU’s eyes are glistening gold with unshed tears.

JAVIER plays with his semen, warm, almost scorching, coating YUZURU’s chest with it until he brings it to his lips and YUZURU eagerly accepts them in his mouth, tasting his own saltiness.

 

JAVIER

Do you taste good Yuzuru?

 

YUZURU nods only, unable to speak with JAVIER’s fingers pressed on his tongue, saliva running down the corners of his mouth. JAVIER thinks he is defiling and angel and that divine punishment will befall soon.

63\. EXT. FOREST. UNKNOWN TIME.

For the first time, JAVIER returns to the dark forest clear of any corpse, skeleton or sign of death. He walks surely into the void, crossing the line willingly between what he should do and what he wants to do. The darkness is gelid and forebodingly silent, but he is not hesitant.

 

JAVIER

Come out. I know you’re there.

 

The silence continues. Nothing moves. Time is still.

 

JAVIER (CONT’D)

I’ve made my choice.

 

A presence is suddenly there, behind JAVIER. It feeds on his insecurities, on the vestiges of fear and the residual doubts.

 

GOLDEN EYES (O.S.)

Have you?

JAVIER

Stop hiding. Come out.

GOLDEN EYES (O.S.)

Will you finally play with me?

JAVIER

I will not kill you Yuzuru.

GOLDEN EYES (O.S.)

But you have already.

 

The GOLDEN EYES finally appear fully formed and without a veil. It’s a huge leopard, black, blended into the darkness except for its pair of golden eyes. What horrifies JAVIER is the moment the big feline morphs into a slender silhouette, sculptured limbs and the smile of the devil – it looks exactly like YUZURU.

 

JAVIER

(disturbed) You’re not him.

GOLDEN EYES

I am what you want me to be.

 

The doppelganger approaches JAVIER. The closing steps taunt him, mock him for his naivety. It grabs hold of JAVIER’s hand, the one which was healed by YUZURU, to its chest.

 

GOLDEN EYES

(pressing JAVIER’s hand into his sternum)

See? It beats for you. I’m alive.

JAVIER

You’re not real.

 

It kisses JAVIER, chaste, a brief touch of lips.

 

GOLDEN EYES

Do I taste like Yuzuru?

JAVIER

_No._

 

It does. The same vanilla and plump softness. This is a dream. He needs to wake up.

 

JAVIER (CONT’D)

I will not let you harm Yuzuru.

GOLDEN EYES

(laughing) Fate can’t be changed. You will not save Yuzuru.

 

64\. INT. BEDROOM. LAURA’S HOUSE. MORNING.

JAVIER wakes up in a bed and in a room he recognizes as not being his. It’s not the same firmness of his mattress, not the same linen of his sheets, and the leaf fractal wallpaper is foreign to him. He sits, looking around, trying to find something that can anchor him. PAULINE comes in excited that he had woken up and jumps to the bed, hugging him.

 

PAULINE

Javi! How much longer are going to sleep?

JAVIER

Were you waiting for me?

PAULINE

Of course! You promised you would play with me.

JAVIER

(confused) Did I?

PAULINE

You can’t go back on your promise or all your hair will fall out!

 

JAVIER laughs. Perhaps PAULINE had finally found a place where she’s safe. Still, JAVIER knows this is not his house.

 

JAVIER

Where are we?

 

LAURA comes in this moment, clearly annoyed and upset, a few ironed shirts in hangers in her arms.

 

LAURA

Are we amnesic now? Don’t think that pretending to be sick will get your laundry done next time.

JAVIER

I was in my place just now.

LAURA

Well, you’re here, aren’t you? This is your place until I kick you out.

 

Despite her harsh words, LAURA checks if he’s still feverish.

 

PAULINE

This is your house Javi. We have always lived here.

JAVIER

(even more confused)

Where is Yuzuru?

PAULINE

Who is Yuzuru?

LAURA

You’re being delusional. I’ll bring you a cup of lemon tea. It should wake you up for real.

 

LAURA leaves the room.

 

PAULINE

Who is Yuzuru, Javi?

JAVIER

He’s your most important person.

PAULINE

You’re the most special.

JAVIER

(raising his voice)

No! Yuzuru, Pauline! You are his angel, don’t you remember?

PAULINE

I’m your angel-

JAVIER

NO! (realizing he has scared Pauline) I’m sorry. You loved Yuzuru so much. He saved you when you fell from the church. He got hurt for you.

PAULINE

(shaking her head)

No, you’re wrong Javi. You’re the one who saved me when I fell from the cliff. Don’t your bruises hurt?

 

JAVIER looks over his two arms and they are covered in cuts and hematomas of dark mauve and magenta, exactly like the ones YUZURU had.

 

JAVIER

Why do I have these?

LAURA (O.S.)

Pauline!

PAULINE

I’ll bring you the tea. Wait for me.

 

JAVIER falls back to the pillow, eyeing the ceiling, as PAULINE runs to LAURA’s call. It was impossible for PAULINE to not remember YUZURU. YUZURU was just now with him. He looks at his hands. They are not injured and a slight white stickiness still in them – YUZURU’s semen. PAULINE returns to the room, a cup of citrus scented tea with her.

 

PAULINE

(sitting by the edge of the bed)

Here, drink this. It will help you remember.

JAVIER

(sitting)

Remember?

PAULINE

Yes, remember what you have promised me.

JAVIER

What did I promise you?

PAULINE

Here, drink.

 

JAVIER takes a sip of the tea. It is extremely sour and hot, it almost burns his tongue. He tries it to put it away but PAULINE holds the cup in front of him.

 

PAULINE

You must drink it while it’s still hot or it won’t be any good. Let me help you.

 

JAVIER takes another sip but the taste is horrible and the liquid corrodes his throat and esophagus as it slides down.

 

JAVIER

I don’t want it anymore.

PAULINE

(yelling) I said DRINK!

 

PAULINE forces the cup up to JAVIER’s lips and presses his jaws with an inhuman strength that he finds himself opening his mouth in pain. He is choking on the sour concoction, but PAULINE is looking feral, making sure he swallows and doesn’t spit it.

 

PAULINE

Drink! Drink! Drink!

 

JAVIER can’t breathe. He’s paralyzed. He faints as PAULINE looms over him.

65\. INT. JAVIER’S BEDROOM. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. MORNING.

JAVIER wakes up choking on his own saliva. He coughs a few more times until he’s sure he can properly open his eyes. He is in his own room, in his own bed, YUZURU peacefully sleeping next to him. Strands of his dark hair are draped over his eyes and he is coiled in a fetal position towards JAVIER. He looks around and he can’t see PAULINE. He takes a deep breath, swallowing a residual sour taste. He lies down again, his heart still beating erratically.

 

YUZURU

(eyes still closed)

A nightmare?

JAVIER

Pauline was there.

YUZURU

Did she look fine? Did she look happy?

JAVIER

She... (hesitating) she had forgotten about you.

YUZURU

(clinging to Javier)

It would be better for her if she had never met me.

 

YUZURU’s hand run up and down JAVIER’s arm, his fingers tracing serpentine patterns. JAVIER relaxes in the touch and he tries to close his eyes without being transported to another dream.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

Did you see me in your dream?

JAVIER

(shaking his head)

You weren’t there.

YUZURU

(agitated) Why? Why wasn’t I there?

 

YUZURU prop to his elbows and dives his lips into JAVIER’s neck, biting his Adam’s apple.

 

YUZURU

(muffled) Why? Why? Why are you letting me go?

JAVIER

I’m not-

 

YUZURU doesn’t let him finish the sentence and kisses him in the mouth, his tongue penetrating deep, reaching for the throat. He vaults himself to sit on JAVIER’s thighs, straddling him.

 

YUZURU

(merely inches away from JAVIER’s face)

What do you want Javier?

 

JAVIER opens his mouth to answer but YUZURU darts to the other side and licks his earlobe, eliciting a wave of arousal that washes over JAVIER. YUZURU strips off all his clothes and he smirks at the glow of lust in JAVIER’s pupils.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

Do you want me, Javi? On top of you like this? Do you want to watch me stretch wide for you? No... (he takes Javier’s hand) you do it.

 

YUZURU coats JAVIER’s index and middle fingers wet with his own saliva and guides them to him. He impales on them. He cries loud, unrestrained, unabashed, unlike all the other times.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

Are you not enjoying being inside me, Javi? Taking away this tightness, touching every part inside of me until they are not virgin anymore and branded as yours only so no one will claim me anymore.

 

JAVIER nods yes, watching the dance YUZURU makes as he lowers himself down further and further. Was this the new YUZURU, reborn from the promise between them?

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

(sliding off Javier’s fingers)

 _No_. You want to be inside my mouth. You want to violate my tongue and release all your essence in me. You want to watch me drink it, every single drop and have my tears on your hard cock when I choke and can’t breathe because you will fill all my mouth and I will not want you to leave me until all my face smells of you.

 

JAVIER gets harder with each syllable that YUZURU accentuates. He gasps when YUZURU crawls down the bed and takes him in the mouth, almost gagging. The way YUZURU yanks his pants down and pulls away the elastic band of his briefs in an impatient wrist turn excites him even more. Now he licks and sucks with such candor JAVIER thinks he will be dry even before he comes. He too clenches his fists so hard that they draw blood so it could ground him to reality and not to the realm the fog of pleasure threatened to take him. YUZURU notices that last stand of rationality and he is resolved to snap it. He releases JAVIER’s manhood, red and swollen, just like his lips. Saliva and precum is dripping from the corner of his mouth to his chin.

 

YUZURU

(massaging Javier’s clenched fists)

Stop. Don’t hurt yourself. _Hurt me_.

 

YUZURU guides JAVIER’s hand to his hair and his scalp, his strands of hair the finest Persian silk woven for him to tangle and play with.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

Put me back where you want.

 

JAVIER leads him down again. YUZURU teases, kissing the shaft lightly, puffing hot breath along the length. YUZURU keeps delaying satisfaction for JAVIER, grazing his teeth at the overly sensitive member, not hurting him, but putting him on the edge of coming and stalling when he’s almost at it.

 

JAVIER

 _Fuck_ Yuzuru.

 

Even though JAVIER has the reigns, it’s YUZURU who dictates his fate and reverses their roles, taking the lead, dominating and enjoying turning him into putty. One more lick, base to tip, tracing his balls and JAVIER shudders, coming with such strong spasms through his chest and lungs that he thinks a part of him is lost forever. JAVIER’s mouth is agape, eyes locked on the ceiling, as he hears YUZURU swallowing all the life he has spilled.

 

JAVIER

(recovering his breath)

_Fuck._

ELIZA

Yes Javi, like we used to.

 

JAVIER looks down, his fingers clutching a mop of long, dirty blond curls, messily pulled from its impeccable bun in an elastic. ELIZA lifts her face, freeing herself from JAVIER hold, her lipstick glossy lips mixing with his semen. She licks them clean and crawls over to him, until their eyes meet.

 

ELIZA (CONT’D)

Did you miss me, Javi?

 

Her long gel fingernails run up and down his pectorals, pinching his nipple. JAVIER is appalled, air not entering nor leaving his lungs as he tries to recognize the woman on top of him.

 

ELIZA (CONT’D)

Did you also forget me, Javi?

JAVIER

Where is Yuzuru?

ELIZA

Yuzuru, Yuzuru, you all want Yuzuru. All charmed by Yuzuru. All fucking Yuzuru.

 

JAVIER reclines deeper in the mattress, keeping as much distance as he can from that woman that repulses him.

 

ELIZA (CONT’D)

Why so cold Javi, when we just made love?

 

She guides his hand, the one just healed by YUZURU, between her legs. It’s warm and wet, his own essence leaking and dripping between her thighs. JAVIER tears away from her sex but she catches his wrist immediately and pins it to the pillow, next to his ear.

 

ELIZA (CONT’D)

Where do you want to go Javi? Do you want Yuzuru?

JAVIER

You’re mad. Release me.

ELIZA But I am Yuzuru, Javi. Can’t you feel it?

 

ELIZA presses down on JAVIER, moaning in the same voice as YUZURU’s, as she rubs both their manhood together. There’s a faint scent of vanilla that’s not her perfume and JAVIER pushes her aberration away with his free hand.

 

ELIZA (CONT’D)

(in Yuzuru’s voice)

Why are you leaving me Javi?

JAVIER

You are not Yuzuru!

 

ELIZA knees JAVIER in the solar plexus and he coughs at the sudden lack of air by the contraction of his muscles, closing his eyes at the horrid pain. She holds him by both hands, knocking him down. When JAVIER recovers his vision, ELIZA is wearing LADY FOX’s mask, her long golden hair down like a horse’s mane.

 

ELIZA

Is this the Yuzuru you want?

JAVIER

 _No_. (drawing another sharp breath) No. NO!

 

JAVIER tries to wrestle away from her. The more he fights, the stronger she gets, as if the mask was feeding off his exasperation.

 

ELIZA

 _Good_. (she kisses his forehead in mocking affection) Very good, Javi. (beat) Because I’m the only one who will have Yuzuru. Not you. Not Pauline. _No one._

 

At that moment, someone pounds on the bathroom’s door. JAVIER can hear a child cry.

 

PAULINE

Javi! Help me Javi!

 

The screeching screams from the bathroom are excruciating and panic invades JAVIER. He needs to save PAULINE.

 

PAULINE

(screaming) No more please! Javi! Help me Javi! JAVI!

ELIZA

Who are you going to save? Yuzuru or Pauline?

JAVIER

You will never have Yuzuru.

ELIZA

(harsh voice) Yuzuru is MINE! I am Yuzuru!

 

JAVIER manages to free himself in ELIZA’s momentarily lapse of anger and he digs his fingers straight into her neck, locking his grip around her throat. She laughs as she asphyxiates, the mask never falling from her face. Her body soon falls limp on the bed. JAVIER jumps immediately out of the mattress, tripping on his own loose underwear and pants. He curses at them, crawling to the door.

 

PAULINE

(crying) JAVI!

 

He opens the door. The bathroom is pristine clean. There is no one there. He enters it, looks around. PAULINE is not there. JAVIER returns to the room. The body on the bed no longer has long, golden hair. It’s short, dark, like a flower of the night. He takes a deep inhalation and holds his breath. He removes the mask. It’s YUZURU, lifeless eyes open and a trail of tears. His strangulated neck accuses JAVIER of his crime. JAVIER is disgusted at himself and he feel nauseous, so sick he might as well die there. He runs to the bathroom, head on the toilet as he vomits nothing but air and acidic juices like lemon concentrate. He looks at himself in the mirror. His eyes are golden, like two medals. He picks up his toothbrush and he stabs the mirror, again and again, as it breaks into tiny pieces.

Everything is dark again.


	9. Chapter IX

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Of lucid nightmares, impossible promises and gunshots. Javier is finally free.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear all, I apologize for leaving Shalom on the gloomy drawer but I promised a friend I would finish it and there is only one more chapter to go. Despite all the confusion with the plot (including myself), I really like this script, so I should apologize to Shalom as well.
> 
> Half of this chapter was written months ago and the other half this week. I apologize for the discrepancies between the style and for any incoherence. This chapter deals with possession, jealousy and even madness I dare to say. Are you finding it confusing? Don't worry, I am too (and I'm the author!).
> 
> Note: This is purely a work of FICTION. By chapter 9, this disclaimer should be like a tattoo already.

66\. INT. JAVIER’S ROOM. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. LATE MORNING.

JAVIER wakes up, his whole body drenched in sweat. He looks to the side, left first then right. YUZURU, PAULINE and ELIZA are not there. He is alone. He looks at his hands – they’re clean. He swallows hard a couple of times, his saliva easily sliding down his throat. There is no soreness or sour after taste. He hears faint footsteps and he jumps immediately into defense mode, pupils dilated, blood pumping into his temples and eardrums, hands drawn into fists.

JAVIER is truly frightened. His heart is beating at such speed that he thinks it might rip open his thorax, cartilage by cartilage, rib by rib, and tear his sternum into two, until he chokes in his own blood. He gets on his feet quickly and he quietly hides behind the door of his bedroom, ready to tackle the intruder in his house. The footsteps are louder. BRIAN had confiscated his gun but he could protect himself in hand-to-hand combat.

 

YUZURU

Javi, are you-

 

JAVIER grabs YUZURU from behind as he enters the room, his fingers gripping a handful of YUZURU’s dark hair while his other hand twists YUZURU’s wrists in a painful position behind his back. YUZURU yelps at the pain and tries to free himself from the excruciating grasp, only to have his head further pulled back.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

(between heavy breaths)

Stop Javi! What are you-

 

JAVIER doesn’t weaken his clasp. His eyes are feral, fueled by the nightmares he has had. YUZURU’s pulse is as frantic as his.

 

JAVIER

(at Yuzuru’s ear)

Who are you?

YUZURU

(still resisting)

It’s me Javi. Your Yuzuru.

JAVIER

I own no one.

YUZURU

I’m yours. You made me yours. You marked me.

JAVIER

You’re lying.

YUZURU

(trying to shake his head)

No. No, Javi-

JAVIER

(raising his voice)

You’re lying!

 

JAVIER pushes YUZURU down to the bed, his body falling to the mattress with a bruising force. He coughs a couple of times, the numbness on his wrist slowly dissipating. JAVIER looks down on YUZURU’s frame, certain he won’t be deceived by the slender silhouette. JAVIER is frightened but he also feels the rush of momentary power in him. It provides him a sense of safety. But it also makes him loathe himself, oh so much, for having resorted to the violence hurdle.

 

JAVIER (CONT’D)

Where is Pauline?

YUZURU

(not looking at him)

You left her with Laura. You told me.

JAVIER

Are you lying?

YUZURU

(voice muffled by the pillow)

No.

JAVIER

Is this another game? Another test? Another demon to exorcise?

YUZURU

No, no, no.

JAVIER

Is this another of Lady Fox’s tricks?

YUZURU

Please Javi.

JAVIER

Tell me!

 

JAVIER grabs YUZURU by the upper arms and turns him around so they are facing each other. JAVIER is crying without realizing it. He is no longer an uncontrolled beast but a lost child seeking for a truth he doesn’t want to hear. The crushing pressure of his embrace is such that some of the cuts in YUZURU reopen and the palm of his hands are stained with blood again.

 

YUZURU

Lady Fox is gone forever.

 

JAVIER releases YUZURU, the younger man still under him, wounded but not scared. There is urgency though emanating from his gaze, an increased veil of torment in his irises.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

(wiping a trail of tears in Javier’s cheek)

Lady Fox will not come back again Javi. Never again.

JAVIER

Why? Because... because I killed her?

YUZURU

No! Javi, you’re wrong.

 

There is a sudden change in JAVIER’s voice, of a restituted calmness and nuances of confidence.

 

JAVIER

I did. And that _woman_ too. I killed them both.

YUZURU

(shaking his head)

Stop Javi. You did nothing.

 

JAVIER stares for brief seconds at the crimson in his hands. The viscous redness soon morphs into a moving snake, a python of garnet scales that travel down his arms to his chest and navel, hugging him in obedience, in submission to its master.

 

JAVIER

I strangled her.

YUZURU

(sitting and holding Javier’s face with both hands)

Don’t go Javi. Come back. Come back to me.

JAVIER

Her tiny neck snapped at my hands. I felt every little bone crumble as I suffocated her. I watched her lips turn purple, her trachea crack under my own fingers.

YUZURU

(in desperation)

You are not them Javi!

JAVIER

(almost chuckling)

It felt... it felt so _right_.

 

YUZURU kisses JAVIER on the lips, needy and precipitous. It is sloppy and messy like trying to catch someone who has slipped down an abyss and would never get out from its infinite, bottomless pit. JAVIER kisses him back, the same fervor as before but more reserved, the flicker of a new found existence very much lit in his eyes.

 

JAVIER (CONT’D)

She deserved it. She was controlling you Yuzu and I didn’t like it. She was a whore, opening her legs for anyone enslaved to her charms.

YUZURU

She is gone Javi. Eliza. Lady Fox. Gone. Now it’s only us Javi. Only us.

JAVIER

(caressing Yuzu’s cheeks)

Even Raya. But you won’t kiss him again, will you?

 

YUZURU keeps shaking his head in negation. He is the one to feel the tingle of a dreaded _déjà vu_ creep through his veins. He runs his fingers through JAVIER’s hair, massaging his scalp, easing into the smell of musk, sweat and forest.

 

YUZURU

No, never again.

JAVIER

 _Good boy_. Now kiss me.

 

YUZURU complies. Their lips meet again in a powerful clash of magnetism. JAVIER thrusts his tongue inside YUZURU’s mouth, touching the palate and licking the sides and the frenulum, how YUZURU has done in their previous night. YUZURU tries to slow him down with his own fleshy organ but JAVIER holds him by the jaw, there, cutting all his movements.

 

JAVIER (CONT’D)

You are seeing someone else.

YUZURU

No one Javi. No one.

JAVIER

(pressing harder)

I can taste it.

 

JAVIER licks YUZURU’s lower lip, coating it with his own saliva, as he continues down the chin and then up to the cheek.

 

JAVIER (CONT’D)

Who is it?

YUZURU

It’s you Javi.

JAVIER

Me?

YUZURU

Yes. Only you Javi. Stop this.

 

JAVIER is back to YUZURU’s swollen lower lip, nipping on the sensitive skin, glowing as if wearing gloss. JAVIER drinks his own essence, nodding yes, that it was indeed him. A different _him_. Not the current him but a version he could discard easily.

 

JAVIER

(caressing Yuzuru’s earlobe)

You want me back.

YUZURU

I want all of you.

JAVIER

You don’t like this _Javi_.

YUZURU

Come back.

JAVIER (SHOUTING)

Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!

YUZURU

 _Javier_. Yes, come back.

JAVIER

SHUT UP!

 

For the first time, the snake attacks Yuzuru, chomping the sharp fangs into the back of his hand. As it draws blood, the reptile disappears into thin air, like ashes scattered in the desert wind. JAVIER feels as if a supernatural entity has lifted his body, taking with it all the jealousy that was boiling in him. YUZURU is again prisoner in his grip, willingly, although his eyes are drowning in hurt.

 

YUZURU

Are you going to be like the others Javi? Telling me you love me and then leave me?

 

JAVIER releases his restraining grip but YUZURU remains in the same position, not moving an inch.

 

JAVIER

Why are you not resisting?

YUZURU

I will accept everything you give me.

 

He closes his eyes, surrendering completely to whatever may happen. JAVIER leans forward and kisses him lightly in the forehead.

 

JAVIER

How do I know this is not a dream?

YUZURU (TREMBLING)

You’ll never know.

JAVIER

(touching Yuzuru’s neck, the same place where he had strangled Eliza)

I killed you in my dream.

YUZURU

Make it reality then Javi. You will never dream again.

JAVIER

_No._

YUZURU

You’ll never be free otherwise.

JAVIER

Are you free?

YUZURU

There are no miracles.

 

YUZURU lies down and JAVIER does the same. There is an infinitesimal distance between their bodies that neither seals. YUZURU raises his hand to the ceiling, opening and closing his fingers, as if trying to grasp something. He nudges closer to JAVIER and dives his nose to the crook of his neck, inhaling the scent of musk, sweat and pine.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

I want to protect you. I never wanted to protect them.

JAVIER

(tilting his head back to give Yuzuru more access)

Who will protect you?

 

YUZURU is silent and only shakes his head. He doesn’t want to hear the answer that no one will ever be able to provide him.

 

YUZURU

I fear nothing.

 

JAVIER’s phone rings. YUZURU flinches at the loud sound and lifts his chest to get it but JAVIER pulls him back for another kiss, unlike the hectic, desire-filled gravity. This is a promise from JAVIER, his own way of saying he will be his guardian. It is a slow-motion contact of lips, moist and virginal. It is the sweetest kiss they have had until now. The phone keeps ringing and there is a battle of wills. YUZURU tries to silence the machine and withdraw from the touch, so delicate and foreign to him, but JAVIER intensifies it, cutting all his escape routes. For brief seconds they are completely disconnected with the world, in the bubble they have created for themselves. The phone stops ringing.

There is perhaps a miracle for them. Or a curse in a voicemail.

 

LAURA (VOICEMAIL)

Pick up the damn phone Javier! I know you’re not sleeping. How could you have left a sick child with me Javi? Can you hear me? Stop being selfish!

 

They both stop at the mention of a sick child. YUZURU reaches for the phone immediately. He has no idea how to unlock it and presses the smooth glass surface with an escalating frenzy. He manages to return the call.

 

YUZURU (ALMOST SCREAMING)

Pauline! How’s Pauline?

LAURA (PHONE)

Finally– who are you?

YUZURU

What did you do to Pauline?

 

JAVIER holds YUZURU’s hand, the one with the electronic device and he nods before snatching it, both their hands in a mixture of sweat, blood and fear.

 

JAVIER

Laura, what–

LAURA (PHONE)

Do you have idea how many times I tried to call you? Do you have any idea how many times the child called for you? DO YOU?

JAVIER

Stop. Stop shouting. What happened? What happened to Pauline?

LAURA (PHONE)

(after a brief silence)

She is not breathing Javier.

 

The phone almost slips from his hand and he can see the alarmed gaze in YUZURU’s face. There was no way fate would play such a prank.

 

JAVIER

How is that possible? Is she sleeping?

 

YUZURU is already out of bed, wincing at the wounds as he walks back and forth. The puffs of air that leaves his mouth are desperate and he knows his punishment has finally started when JAVIER puts down the phone.

 

JAVIER

Pauline won’t wake up.

 

YUZURU dashes to the door that same instant, ignoring JAVIER’s pleas to wait.

67\. INT. LAURA’S ROOM. LAURA’S APARTMENT. LATE MORNING.

LAURA’s room is simple in its design, walls covered in plain beige wallpaper, a small double wooden bed and matching nightstands. The element that pops out is a picture of her and JAVIER, both in their adolescent years, a grin from ear to ear as they lift a large trophy of a sand sculpture competition, framed with a crack on the glass that runs from one corner to the other. YUZURU notices it but ignores the picture as he kneels on the floor, next to the bed, holding PAULINE’s hand. His voice is soft, like a lullaby and he smiles too.

 

YUZURU

Pauline. Pauline. It’s me. I came to bring you home.

 

PAULINE has her arms and legs stretched, her face like a porcelain doll. She is Snow White lying in the crystal coffin.

 

LAURA

She won’t wake up.

YUZURU

She will! She is my little girl. She will not leave me alone.

 

He presses down harder on her knuckles and wrist, but not a single a mark is left in them. He can’t feel any pulse in her either.

 

JAVIER

Yuzuru–

YUZURU (VISIBLY SHAKING)

She is being stubborn. I shouldn’t have spoiled her.

JAVIER

Yuzuru, Pauline is–

YUZURU (YELLING)

Pauline is not dead!

 

The sheer intensity of his voice frightens everyone in the room, including himself. He tries to swallow back the echo but he chokes on it. He coughs a few times, fighting for air as the muscles of his throat cramp his airpipe. JAVIER is next to YUZURU, rubbing his back in an improvised technique to drive away the panic. YUZURU jerks away from his touch and returns his undivided attention to PAULINE’s stiff body.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

Did I scare you? I’m sorry. I’m not angry. I could never be angry at you.

 

He pulls her limp body in a tight embrace. He rocks her back and forth, her name a mantra on his lips.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

I want to go home. Pauline wants to wake up in her bed. This is not her place.

JAVIER

(he touches Yuzuru’s shoulder blade tentatively)

Yuzuru.

YUZURU

You promised her, didn’t you? You promised us a home. Us, you, Pauline and I. The three of us. Didn’t you? Didn’t you, Javi? Just the three of us. No one else. Isn’t it? Isn’t it, Javi? Javi? Javi!

JAVIER (NODDING)

Yes, let’s go home.

 

JAVIER helps YUZURU to his feet, who is holding PAULINE tight to his chest. He never once looks at JAVIER and he walks out of the room as if he knew perfectly the architecture and blueprint of the place and without acknowledging either one of the Fernández siblings. JAVIER follows immediately.

68\. INT. JAVIER’S ROOM. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. NOON.

JAVIER tugs a light cover over PAULINE, fixing it just at her neck, so she won’t catch a cold, and together with her little satchel. Just as he picks it up, the string snaps and a small piece of paper falls from within, next to her pillow. It has only a word written in it – JAVIER’s name – in crooked letters and missing the ‘e’ vowel.

YUZURU is not in the room, JAVIER not understanding why he suddenly fled to the living room, but he is glad he did because he almost cries at PAULINE’s attempt to write his name and his hands refuse to check the pulse on her feeble neck, afraid he might have been too late when she called him in the dream.

A dream?

 

YUZURU (V.O. IN A FLASHBACK)

You’ll never know.

 

There is a smile in PAULINE’s face that he hadn’t noticed before.

69\. INT. LIVING ROOM. JAVIER’S APARTMEMT. IMMEDIATELY AFTER.

JAVIER needs answers, more than ever, and YUZURU is the only one who has them. He slips the paper note into the pocket of his pants and he expects YUZURU to be calmer, perhaps still in shock but in a more tranquil state of mind. PAULINE isn’t dead, is she? No, she is just dreaming. A deep winter sleep. Nothing sleeps forever.

 

YUZURU (V.O.)

(in slow, intermittent intervals)

Javi. Javier. Javi. Javier.

JAVIER

Yuzuru? What are you–

 

JAVIER sees YUZURU standing in the middle of the living room, completely naked, bare feet on the floor and a gun on his hand. The one that Brian had confiscated. The gun was a gift when he successfully passed the shooting and marksmanship examination in the academy. He liked that gun and he always had the impulse to take apart the slide and the barrel and assemble back all the pieces.

He doesn’t know, though, if the magazine is loaded or not.

 

YUZURU

This is what you saw the first time, wasn’t it?

JAVIER?

What?

YUZURU

This... (he slides the muzzle up and down his abdomen) ... wretched body.

JAVIER

(approaching Yuzuru)

Put the gun away Yuzuru.

YUZURU

Why? What harm will it do? Pauline has left me.

JAVIER

You can heal her. You have this–

YUZURU

Curse!

JAVIER

You can save lives!

YUZURU

It’s a killing curse! Why do I have this Javi? Why? I can’t bring back those who have left me. They all do. Everyone leaves me!

JAVIER

It’s not–

YUZURU

It’s the truth! Even you! Even you Javier. You will leave me. You want to leave me now.

JAVIER

I will not leave you Yuzuru.

YUZURU

(pointing the gun at Javier)

Stop this! You will pretend like the others, sweet promises and then what? Jump a building? Drown in the river? Tie a knot around your neck?

 

YUZURU’s hands are shaking but the grip on the pistol is firm. With each step forward from JAVIER, YUZURU takes one back like a cornered gazelle, until his back hits the wall.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

What if I pull the trigger? You killed Pauline! You killed her with your kindness! And now you want to take me too.

JAVIER

You know it’s not true.

YUZURU

What is the truth Javier? What are the lies? What is it that you want from me Javi? Love? Sex? Power? Control?

JAVIER

What do you want to give me Yuzuru?

YUZURU

(in a loss of words)

I–

 

Tears slide down Yuzuru’s face, leaving a glistening trail along his cheeks. He is trying to muster what words to say but a silence hangs in the room, except for the evaporation fan of the fridge and the occasional drops of water from a leaking faucet.

YUZURU seems to make a movement with his arms to put the gun down but as JAVIER takes another step, he presses the barrel onto his on temple.

 

JAVIER

(raising his voice)

Please Yuzuru! Don’t be stupid.

YUZURU

(laughing like a maniac)

Yes, I’m stupid. I’m a fool. A dog, a cockroach that eats dead flesh. (His eyes turn feral) I’m an angel Javi. I’m the devil! My heart burns when you read from that bible of yours and I fly when you sing hymns to me! Won’t you choke me, Javi, with your rosary? See what the cross does to me.

 

YUZURU continues laughing, the sound of his hilarity resembling a combination of torturous screams and the glees of an elated child.

 

JAVIER

You are an angel Yuzu. The kindest and the most beautiful one in the world. Pauline thinks so too.

YUZURU

Don’t you dare to say her name!

JAVIER

I’m sorry.

YUZURU

Don’t you–

 

There seems to be an ocean of emotions in Yuzuru that he can’t control and each wave that crashes at the shore takes something from it and leaves it forgotten in the depths of its bed.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

I’m a monster, Javi. I don’t know when I was born but I know who I am. I’m death’s favorite child! I know you can see the snake Javi. He can see you too.

 

His voice is tight, just like the enormous pressure on his jaws and teeth but his arm twitches from fatigue of the pose it is in and JAVIER takes the opportunity to hold YUZURU’s hand with the gun.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

He wants you Javi but I won’t let it. Run Javi. Run before it’s too late.

JAVIER

Let’s run together.

YUZURU

Javier–

JAVIER

Would you do that for me?

 

YUZURU nods and smiles gingerly, a pure black void on his irises. He doesn’t let go of the weapon yet but he lowers it, slowly, almost like in slow motion, his fingers always on the trigger while JAVIER’s hand hover over his knuckles.

 

JAVIER (CONT’D)

You won’t need the gun Yuzuru. Give it to me.

YUZURU (STILL SMILING)

As you wish.

 

The gun is at both their waist level and YUZURU pulls the trigger. It all becomes silent like a scene from a mute movie. The propulsion of the gun being fired is enough for YUZURU to release it and for it to drop on the floor. It all happens too quickly. JAVIER’s shirt takes mere seconds to be soaked in red and he falls to the ground.

70\. COMPLETE DARKNESS. BEYOND TIME AND SPACE.

It is completely dark, without a single source of light. There is nothing to hold one’s body intact and nothing to be grasped. It is a state of complete emptiness but also complete assimilation with the endless surroundings.

JAVIER tries to open his eyes but he can’t. His body is light and he doesn’t know whether he’s floating or whether he still has a physical body. He feels nothing.

Until a pair of hands plunge into his chest. Even in all the levity and immaterial phase, he can feel them twisting the sinews of his heart and the fingers, he thinks those are fingers, searching something in him.

It hurts. It hurts so much that he screams without limits, without worrying about the lack of air. His cries can be heard and they ricochet and amplify in this world outside of time. It hurts so much he hopes there is no afterlife, so he could disappear forever that moment.

There is a GUNSHOT. A bullet falls from JAVIER’s lips.

 

GOLDEN EYES (V.O.)

Don’t open your eyes Javier.

 

JAVIER can hear the voice but he feels nothing. No more pair of hands and no more pain too. Nothing.

 

JAVIER (GASPING)

Yuzuru?

GOLDEN EYES (V.O.)

Don’t open your eyes if you want to live. You’re too involved already. You have to make a choice.

JAVIER

What choice?

GOLDEN EYES (V.O.)

Being a monster is lonely Javier, but being an angel is even more. An eternity without love. Why didn’t you grant him his wish?

JAVIER

Yuzuru.

GOLDEN EYES (V.O.)

Why don’t you grant yourself your own wish?

JAVIER

My wish?

GOLDEN EYES (V.O.)

Why?

JAVIER

What wish?

GOLDEN EYES (V.O.)

You know what wish. To die in my arms. Choose Javier.

JAVIER

No.

GOLDEN EYES (V.O.) Choose Javier. So you can finally understand that there is no choice. You’re mine Javier. You always were.

JAVIER

No! Yuzuru–

GOLDEN EYES (V.O.)

I am Yuzuru.

JAVIER

No. I choose life. I choose to live! And I will save Yuzuru and...

 

JAVIER is certain there is someone else he needs to save. A girl. A small girl. A girl that can’t read but loves pancakes.

What was her name?

JAVIER opens his eyes.

71\. INT. LIVING ROOM. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. AFTER THE GUNSHOT.

A warm, cream light greets JAVIER’s eyes. He lies on the floor but he can feel all his limbs and inclusive move them. It takes a few seconds for him to adjust to the sudden clarity. His gun is next to his elbow, the magazine completely empty. He raises his head slightly and he sees strands of black hair over his exposed torso and a mouth that sucks his wound. When YUZURU looks at him, much paler than before, his lips and chin tainted with JAVIER’s blood, he genuinely smiles.

JAVIER feels no pain and he knows he is completely healed. He sits and looks around. He feels no bullet inside of him. He sees no bullet on the floor. There was no bullet to begin with.

 

YUZURU

You’re free now Javi.

 

JAVIER touches YUZURU’s cheek lightly, lingering in the authenticity of the caress and he kisses him. It is his own blood on their lips. He stares into YUZURU’s eyes. There are no traces of gold there.

The slip of paper with his name falls from his pocket.

 

YUZURU (REPEATING)

You’re free now.

JAVIER

Free? (he traces the writing on the paper) No, I need to save–

 

JAVIER tries to say the name of the girl but nothing comes out. He tries again to no avail.

 

YUZURU

There is no one else Javi.

JAVIER (IN PANIC)

There is. It’s–

 

There is no name again. He moves his mouth but no sound comes out. JAVIER stands up and rushes to his bedroom followed by YUZURU who walks calmly.

The bed is perfectly made. There is no one there.

 

JAVIER

She was here!

 

YUZURU sits on the bed, nodding. They both know that someone was there. Silent tears fall from Yuzuru’s eyes.

 

YUZURU

Who? Who was here Javi?

 

JAVIER falls to his knees, crumpling the piece of paper in the palm of his hand with his fingers.

 

JAVIER (SOBBING)

I can’t remember her name!


	10. Chapter X

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The grand finale - of remembering and forgetting memories, of vanilla on one's lips and the ultimate price to pay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear all, I swear that one of the worst pains out there is wisdom tooth pain because mine is literally killing me and I can't even speak or think properly. I know that it must be extracted but just the thought of going to the knife it scares to death. 
> 
> And well, because I needed something to cope with the pain, I finally managed to finish Shalom! This piece sort of had a hiatus in between but let me thank for all of those who decided to stick to it until the very end. It means a lot to me <3
> 
> Disclaimer: this is a work of FICTION! By this chapter, I hope this is self-explanatory. Also, profanity and religious references are not meant to offend anyone. Ideas for sake of the plot.

72\. INT. CHURCH NAVE. SOMETIME IN THE PAST.

The same church as always is empty and the orange sunset rays penetrate through the stained glass, changing the original color of each window. YUZURU is kneeling on one of the benches, directly in front of a statue of an angel with a huge sword. His head is down, resting on both his hands.

There is utter silence until FATHER SHEM arrives and sits next to YUZURU, who does not leave his kneeling posture to greet him. FATHER SHEM starts humming the first few verses of AVE MARIA.

 

YUZURU

(still not moving and with his eyes closed)

Stop.

FATHER SHEM (SINGING)

_Ave Maria, gratia plena._

YUZURU

Please stop.

FATHER SHEM

_Maria, ora pro nobis._

YUZURU

(raising his voice)

Please!

FATHER SHEM

Look at me.

YUZURU (SOBBING)

No. Please.

FATHER SHEM

(placing a hand on Yuzuru’s shoulder)

Look at me, my lost lamb. Everything will be fine.

 

YUZURU lifts his head but he has his gaze fixed on the angel. His eyes are red from the tears but it is a defiant look emanating from his dark pupils. He prepares to stand but FATHER SHEM grabs him by the jaw and forces him to look at the older man.

 

FATHER SHEM (CONT’D)

Look at me, my child, when I tell you to do so.

 

YUZURU nods and kisses FATHER SHEM’s free hand.

 

YUZURU

I am sorry father.

 

FATHER SHEM releases YUZURU and gently helps him to sit on the bench. He brushes away any dust on YUZURU’s knees and gives a light squeeze on his thigh.

 

FATHER SHEM

Were you praying?

YUZURU

(wiping away his tears)

There will never be enough prayers. _He_ will never take me back.

FATHER SHEM

Did you come for forgiveness then? For the two lives that you took?

YUZURU

I didn’t kill them. They were... they were brothers! (he rubs his biceps, embracing himself like a cornered gazelle) We... there was nothing with us. It was just...

 

YUZURU doesn’t finish the sentence, clearly uncomfortable. FATHER SHEM runs a hand on his dark hair.

 

FATHER SHEM

An orgy? Did the same faces also had the same pleasure on their tongues? (He taps the patch of skin behind Yuzuru’s ear) Murder and suicide, how thrilling is that?

YUZURU

(moves slightly to avoid the touch on his neck)

He didn’t know who he was anymore. He didn’t even recognize his own twin, the same split image. He was just... empty.

FATHER SHEM

My Yuzuru, (he traces Yuzuru’s shoulder blade), you have the gift of life, but you also steal memories.

YUZURU

(voice almost breaking)

I don’t want this. How long does _he_ want me here?

FATHER SHEM

Who are we to question _his_ ways?

YUZURU

Will I be alone until time ends?

FATHER SHEM

It’s your gift, my child. You can’t ever be with anyone.

 

YUZURU cries silently, his sob contained by his sealed lips. He pulls out a silver pocket watch that belonged to one of the twins and he throws it at the feet of the statue of the angel.

 

FATHER SHEM (CONT’D)

But I will always be here, Yuzuru.

 

FATHER SHEM raises both his hands to YUZURU and the younger man kisses each palm, wet kisses with his own tears and saliva.

 

73\. INT. JAVIER’S ROOM. JAVIER APARTMENT. IMMEDIATELY AFTER JAVIER’S OUTBURST.

 

JAVIER (SOBBING)

I can’t remember her name!

 

JAVIER walks to the edge of the bed and touches the mattress and the wrinkle-free sheets. He still can’t believe that there was no one there and he presses his hand further down to see if the physicality of the moment was real. He steps closer to YUZURU who is sitting just inches away and who holds him by his legs and pulls their bodies together, the face of the younger man resting on Javier’s diaphragm, just under the depression on the junction of his ribcage.

 

YUZURU

Who is she Javier? Who? Tell me.

JAVIER

She was with Laura. She did everything for you.

YUZURU

Yes. I remember.

JAVIER

She took the flight for you. She... she said you liked me. She was... she...

YUZURU

Yes. What is her name Javier?

JAVIER

This was her home. She wanted to be with you... and with me. She is...

YUZURU

(his tears soak a patch on Javier’s T-shirt)

 _Yes_ Javi. Who is she?

JAVIER (SHOUTING)

I don’t know! I can’t remember!

 

YUZURU holds JAVIER even tighter afraid he would just evaporate without warning. JAVIER tries to dislodge from him, grabbing YUZURU’s hair with increasing cadences of strength until the younger man cries in pain. It’s him who falls to his knees this time and their positions are inversed. YUZURU hugs JAVIER to his chest, the Spaniard’s face just above his heart, the mop of hazelnut curls brushing against his chin, the limp body locked between his thighs.

 

JAVIER (CONT’D)

Why can’t I remember her name?

YUZURU

(kissing Javier’s forehead)

I’m sorry Javi. I’m so sorry.

JAVIER

Tell me who she was. She liked pancakes.

 

YUZURU shakes his head and he keeps apologizing.

 

JAVIER (CONT’D)

Tell me. You know everything. Tell me why I can’t remember.

YUZURU

It’s only a matter of time, Javi, until you forget everything. Until it’s all gone.

JAVIER

No. No. No. I will remember.

YUZURU

We have defied fortune for too long, Javi. You will forget about (Pauline), just how you forgot about (Eliza) and (Lady Fox).

 

YUZURU says all three names but JAVIER can’t hear them. It is as if the names had been censored and each time YUZURU says them, JAVIER is met with complete and utter silence. YUZURU smiles, hiding his own pain for the flashbacks of all the others that underwent the same process of lapse of memory, and he kisses JAVIER’s ears.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

Forget Javi. Forget about (Pauline). Forget about what is bad and live your life.

JAVIER

Did you know she would disappear?

YUZURU

Yes. But I wasn’t ready. (He takes a deep breath). I am now. That’s why I must disappear too.

JAVIER

This is stupid.

YUZURU

You are free now Javier.

JAVIER

I don’t want to forget.

YUZURU

It’s not your choice!

JAVIER

I’ve made my choice. For me, for you, for...

YUZURU

(chuckling as tears keep falling)

What is choice but an illusion? We have been playing with fortune for too long already.

 

YUZURU places his hand on JAVIER’s until they completely match each other, thumb on thumb, index on index, life line on life line. Their sizes are different but they uncannily complement each other.

 

YUZURU

We are the same Javier.

JAVIER

The same?

YUZURU

We were created from the same breath.

 

YUZURU kisses JAVIER on the lips but instead of a gesture of affection, it is the simple exchange of oxygen between lungs. There is a sense of familiarity that JAVIER doesn’t understand why.

 

JAVIER

We are not brothers.

YUZURU

Stop thinking as a human.

JAVIER

What are we then?

YUZURU

We? We are monsters, Javier, monsters living in the depths of darkness in search of the light only to be burn by it. (He kisses Javier again). What one gives, the other must take back.

JAVIER

(shaking his head)

It’s impossible. This is not true. If you heal people... (he touches the place where the presumed gunshot wound was)... then I...

 

JAVIER looks at the empty bed again, beyond YUZURU’s body. No one is there. When he looks at YUZURU again, he sees ELIZA’s and PAULINE’s faces shifting one after the other, although he doesn’t recognize either of them. It is YUZURU’s voice that brings him back to reality.

 

YUZURU

Javi? Come back. There is nothing more to take.

JAVIER

(running a hand on Yuzuru’s cheeks)

Did I–?

YUZURU

 _No_. I was too brave, Javi, too bold and reckless because I had you. I played your part to perfection and now _he_ will punish me.

JAVIER

Who?

 

YUZURU points to the ceiling but his arms fall next to his hips, robbed of their strength.

 

JAVIER (CONT’D)

Won’t he forgive you?

YUZURU

(shaking his head)

Does this world ever worship monsters? Are there any prayers for those in hell? (His eyes become feral.) Burn, burn, burn. What have we ever done to not deserve mercy? It’s time, Javi. We rejected time and when the clock strikes twelve, it will slap us with the hands of fate. Our own fairytale. My own happy ending.

 

YUZURU falls back to the bed, arms spread to the side as if being crucified.

 

JAVIER

(standing up)

Are you too going to be nothing but a memory?

YUZURU

Yes. A name at first, a presence, and later just a remembrance. Until the time when you wake up one day and...

 

YUZURU raises his arms to the ceiling. He closes his fists as if grabbing air and opens his hands immediately after, letting whatever it was there slip through his fingers.

 

YUZURU (CONT’D)

It will all be gone.

JAVIER

Everything we had was real.

YUZURU

It was.

JAVIER

The dances, the songs, the leap of faith.

YUZURU

You really did fly.

JAVIER

The sex. I know you, your lips on mine, your inside, your tightness around my cock, your cries as I came in you. It was all real.

 

With each of JAVIER’s descriptions, YUZURU trembles a little, his body shivering at the vivid images of their love-making.

 

YUZURU (AROUSED)

 _Yes._ I can still feel you within me. _More_.

JAVIER

I gave you part of me.

 

YUZURU rolls in the bed to the side, a hybrid sound of crying and laughing produced by his vocal chords. He propels himself to sit with his elbows, legs open wide, and he gestures JAVIER to come closer. The Spaniard sits in front of YUZURU in the same way, his legs open on either side of his hips. YUZURU pulls him closer by the neck, both their clothed erections in contact.

 

YUZURU (WHISPERING)

I gave you _everything_.

 

YUZURU kisses JAVIER gently, the wet trail of tears meeting their lips. He gains access to JAVIER’s mouth with his tongue and he is so afraid he will drown in it he presses even harder.

There is so much in the kiss that JAVIER thinks he might faint. He can feel the taste of people he knows not who they are, the girl with feathers, the twins, Eliza, the nightmares of his choices, the dead gazelle, the leopard, the fox, the golden eyes. And then YUZURU. For the first time, JAVIER has the true taste of YUZURU, intoxicating vanilla, sweet and peppery, a child and an adult at the same time.

It is when they are finally parted, when YUZURU’s lower lip is swollen, glistening with their saliva, that JAVIER tastes the salty tears and another flavor. A much more bitter one, mint over smoked oak.

 

JAVIER

What have you done?

YUZURU

I returned what was not mine to have.

JAVIER

No. Please don’t. I don’t want to forget.

YUZURU

I’m giving you back your freedom.

JAVIER

(raising his voice)

Take it back. Take it back!

 

JAVIER does feel light-headed, a headache hammering his temples. He squeezes his eyes shut, a funny heat seeping through his veins, and he grabs YUZURU’s shoulders for support.

 

JAVIER (CONT’D)

Take it back. Take it back. Take it back.

YUZURU

(brushing away the hair that had fallen over Javier’s forehead and eyelashes)

What do you want me to take back?

JAVIER

(staring at Yuzuru fervently)

Me! Take it back. Take _me_ back!

 

YUZURU embraces him once again, their chest pressed together, as he caresses the ridges and valleys of JAVIER’s spine.

 

YUZURU

I cannot. I’m sorry.

 

JAVIER rests his head on YUZURU’s shoulder, suddenly feeling very tired. He fondles the younger man’s earlobe, still remembering that he loved that touch which would make him purr like a cat.

 

JAVIER

Take it back.

YUZURU

I don’t want to be a memory. But you won’t be able to face the punishment.

JAVIER

What punishment? From God?

YUZURU

(shaking his head)

Your own.

 

JAVIER is pliant under YUZURU’S grasp, who pulls him closer to the headboard and lays him on the pillows. There isn’t much strength left in JAVIER’s muscles and his consciousness is almost slipping away. He still seizes YUZURU’s wrist as the younger man prepares to leave.

 

JAVIER (BARELY AUDIBLE)

Take it back... please.

 

YUZURU kisses JAVIER for the last time. Not a kiss to wake up the sleeping beauty, but to suspend all the memories but this one.

 

YUZURU

Thank you, Javier, for loving me.

 

74\. INT. JAVIER’S ROOM. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. SOMETIME IN THE FUTURE.

 

When JAVIER wakes up at the sound of the alarm of his mobile phone, he stares at the single fluorescent light bulb on the ceiling that he hasn’t had time (and patience) to find a cover. A small black Labrador Retriever jumps to his bed and licks his face, much to his annoyance. He gets out of bed and goes to the bathroom, his pet following him.

JAVIER brushes his teeth without looking at the mirror but at his dog that insists on drinking the (clean) toilet water and he pushes his pet to the shower area, closing the glass panels so he can’t escape. He spits the foam and quickly shaves, all the gestures automatic and precise like a robot. He too soon enters the shower and the warm water washes both him and the black canine, the smell of the vanilla shampoo filling the air. It was the only scent he bought now, not that he didn’t like others, but it was the one he always felt compelled to have, as if he would remember something if he used it.

 

75\. INT. LIVING ROOM. JAVIER’S APARTMENT. IMMEDIATELY AFTER.

 

JAVIER prepares a mug of coffee for him and settles it on the small table in front of the TV, full of books about occult studies, a guide on the types of angels out there, recipes for witchcraft, and a highlighted newspaper editorial entitled _Where is Your Faith?_ , after he blow-dries his dog. He turns on the TV, nothing interesting but he leaves it with a volume that he can hear if his dog didn’t bark.

He fills one of the stainless steel bowls full of water and a drop of vitamins for his pet, and the other one with tricolor biscuits. He pops a red one to his mouth, not tasting bad but weird, especially when it mixed with the remnants of the toothpaste. JAVIER fixes two eggs, scrambled, and he almost turns on the toaster when he notices the red cross on his calendar on today’s date.

He checks what he has on his cupboards and he pulls out all the necessary ingredients for what he has in mind. Flour, eggs, sugar, milk, vanilla extract, baking powder. He whisks all of them and prepares pancake batter. As he pours the first scoop on the heated fry pan, the piece of news on the TV catches his attention.

 

NEWS REPORTER (ON TV)

... the 47-year-old chaplain was found dead, crucified this morning on the church of his own parish. Authorities believe he was victim of a...

 

JAVIER returns his attention to the stove as he smells something burning. He flips the pancake and it is almost completely black.

 

JAVIER

Fuck.

 

He throws this first one away, they are never perfect, and he keeps his eyes on the pan even though he keeps listening to the description of that case.

 

WOMAN NO. 1 BEING INTERVIEWED ON TV (CRYING)

He was such an honorable man! How could someone have done such atrocity?

MAN INTERVIEWED ON TV

Everyone loved Father Shem. It couldn’t have been a murder. Nonsense.

WOMAN NO. 2 INTERVIEWED ON TV (NERVOUS)

No. No. I don’t know anything. I never talked to that man. No.

NEWS REPORTER (ON TV)

... the police have already confirmed the possibility of torture and murder. We appeal for viewers’ discretion on the following images...

 

They are really gruesome and JAVIER almost loses his appetite. It was Father Shem, arms and legs extended like Da Vinci’s Vitruvian Man, numerous cuts on the limbs that were not hidden by his cassock. He doesn’t know if these were self-inflicted or not but it appeared that some of these were older than others, some inclusive with signs of having been recently healed.

JAVIER fetches his coffee and turns off the TV, choosing to ignore such gore cases now that he wasn’t a detective anymore. He finishes cooking his pancakes, a tower of these fluffy, golden cakes, too many actually. He drizzles three with maple syrup and strawberry jam and he packs the remaining ones in a plastic lunch box.

When JAVIER finishes his breakfast, he puts on the dishes on the sink, buckles the leash around his dog’s collar, picks up his navy blue trench coat and the pancakes, and he leaves home.

 

76\. EXT. SERIES OF DIFFERENT LOCATIONS. THROUGHOUT THE MORNING.

 

The following scenes are of JAVIER and his dog in the city as he goes to different locations, with excerpts of readings JAVIER has marked on the books from his coffee table.

Cue Music: Gregorian – Brothers in Arms

 

JAVIER walks down the street where his apartment is, a dog sand box at the end before an intersection. He lights a cigarette as his black Labrador finishes its necessities and smartly covers them with dirt. He greets his neighbors, old couples, a family of three, two twin sisters with different heights. He flirts with the new tenant across the café just around the corner but it is just a few phrases and innuendos. JAVIER has tried to recreate the passion he had once felt in the arms of a certain stranger, he surely knows he has, but he hasn’t been successful so far. He doesn’t know if he ever will. The tail of his dog hits his knee and he leaves this momentarily wishful lapse of time. They keep walking down the street towards the outskirts.

 

_Contrary to popular belief, angels are not celestial entities guarding one’s soul. Neither are they messengers in feathery, virginal wings, often depicted in mainstream media with golden locks and fair complexion. Angels have often been interpreted as being the opposite force to demons, entities summoned by devil and trying to persuade mortals to commit sins so their souls can be damned for eternity. In reality, angels are those who disrupt balance._

 

JAVIER arrives at the local cemetery, not a large one, but pretty much full majorly with tombstones of small sizes, some elaborately carved with names and motifs, others with only a picture and two dates. He walks to one of the further away aisles, to a gravestone that is under a willow tree, forever covered by the shadows of its characteristic falling branches. There is nothing written on the stone slab nor a photograph.

JAVIER opens the lunch box and places the cold pancakes on the soil on the ground, as he kneels. There are a couple of dandelions growing next to the grave and he smiles. She definitely loved this flower. He places a chaste kiss on the stone, followed by a lick from his black Labrador.

 

JAVIER

These are your favorite. I made them vanilla.

 

_The well-known myth of angels being warriors of heaven is, as the name indicates, just a myth, folk stories told from generation to generation..._

_There are a variety of the so called ‘angels’, figures of good, and in this category, there are those simply better known as ‘Rares’. These are angels that have crossed to the mortal realm on their own volition and are forever banished from both heaven and hell._

 

JAVIER arrives on the same park where we first met him. He sits on the same bench overlooking the same fountain of the fallen angel. A group of children are playing an improvised match of football. In order to defend a rather strong kick from one of the blue shirts, the goalkeeper of the red shirts throws himself to the side but instead of falling to the lawn, his knee is caught on the metallic fence and he cries loudly from the pain. The presumed coach quickly cleans the wound and puts a gauze.

 

COACH (SINGING)

Pain, pain, go away. Let my children play.

 

JAVIER doesn’t know why but he expects the wounded knee to be completely healed.

 

_Worse than not having god for forgiveness or the devil to be one’s compass, an angel without a home will forever be a wanderer, never free and alone. What a Rare chooses is a lifetime of solitude, alienated from love and affection._

 

The child stands up but the wound keeps bleeding. The coach forfeits the match and calls for the members to pack their stuff. JAVIER shakes his head. There were no such miracles as healing in this world.

A blue butterfly flies right in front of his eyes, settling on a nearby orange gerbera, and his Labrador starts barking in excitement. Instead of chasing it though, a LITTLE GIRL runs to the flower and she holds the butterfly between her closed palms. When she opens her hands, half of wing is crushed.

 

LITTLE GIRL

I killed it! I just wanted to play with it.

 

An older woman approaches the LITTLE GIRL, she fixes her frilly dress and she makes a sad face when she sees the butterfly.

 

LITTLE GIRL (SOBBING)

I didn’t mean to! I swear! I’m not a bad girl!

OLDER WOMAN

Don’t cry my princess. You are not a bad girl. It’s just the butterfly my baby. They are very fragile, like rice paper. Now, what is of nature we must return to it. How about we find another flower so it can rest?

 

JAVIER sees the LITTLE GIRL nodding and holding hands with the woman, which by now he assumes as her mother. Their smiles are contagious and JAVIER finds himself doing the same. There is something in that little girl that he thinks he recognizes, perhaps her blonde hair or the sky-blue ribbons on her dress, but he just doesn’t know what.

JAVIER walks to the fountain and submerges his hands on the freezing water. It is surprisingly clean and he brings some to his face, not drinking it though. He looks one last time at the statue of the angel, a serpent circling its feet, when he senses a presence behind him.

He swears he knows that voice. He just can’t remember from where.

 

VOICE

Hello, Mr. Stranger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for supporting this fic and for reaching this final line! *Cheers*

**Author's Note:**

> As I've said, this is my first time tackling a screenplay format, so feedback is much appreciated <3


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